Confused re. combined feeding, help!

Glowing

Hi,

I have a lovely 6 week old daughter who I have been exclusively breastfeeding up to now. She is not a bad sleeper really, tends to wake up once or twice a night (though twice is more usual). I'm really finding things tough going however with the constant feeding during the day and the nights, and am getting so drained. I'd really love my hubby to be able to help out a bit.

I've been considering replacing her last evening feed (11pm or so) with formula or ebm (though would be difficult to express an entire feeds worth of bm in one day) - so the hubby can help while I get a headstart on some sleep - but the advice i've been reading online is so mixed and there are so many opinions and confliciting advice.

Some people are saying that replacing even one feed will affect your whole milk supply - and that introducing one bottle of formula will negate the benefits of breastfeeding with regard to babys immune system. I'm just bamboozled at this stage. Would I be mad to mess with things now since the bfeeding is going pretty well - and best to let nature take its course? I suppose the hardest part is over now, should she start spacing out her feeds now?

Sorry for the brain dump, would love to hear your advice/experiences!

edellc

Glowing wrote: »

Hi,

I have a lovely 6 week old daughter who I have been exclusively breastfeeding up to now. She is not a bad sleeper really, tends to wake up once or twice a night (though twice is more usual). I'm really finding things tough going however with the constant feeding during the day and the nights, and am getting so drained. I'd really love my hubby to be able to help out a bit.

I've been considering replacing her last evening feed (11pm or so) with formula or ebm (though would be difficult to express an entire feeds worth of bm in one day) - so the hubby can help while I get a headstart on some sleep - but the advice i've been reading online is so mixed and there are so many opinions and confliciting advice.

Some people are saying that replacing even one feed will affect your whole milk supply - and that introducing one bottle of formula will negate the benefits of breastfeeding with regard to babys immune system. I'm just bamboozled at this stage. Would I be mad to mess with things now since the bfeeding is going pretty well - and best to let nature take its course? I suppose the hardest part is over now, should she start spacing out her feeds now?

Sorry for the brain dump, would love to hear your advice/experiences!

OP I combo feed for 6mths because like you I was just so tired I was like a zombie

What we did was give him his last feed of formula and he also got a formula bottle if (should I say when he woke during the night rather than if lol) he woke up in the night and daddy got there first if not then I fed him and it all worked out okay.

It never effected my milk production and only speaking of my experience his immune system seemed to be fine, obviously got the usual coughs and colds in the winter but who doesnt when its cold out.

For me the whole stretching feeds out thing at 6wks old just wasnt for me, I fed baby on demand and in time they stretch themselves out, why let them get themselves into a mess and you tearing your hair out with them crying to be fed and you ignoring it so as to "stretch things out" I just feel the whole point of breast feeding is you feed on demand and in time a routine forms as does longer times between feeds.

I think reading on line is all well and good but you have to do what suits you and your family dynamic and everyones dynamic is different.

My only other piece of advice is about the formula, we used aptamil as we did try others but they where too heavy for him so the aptamil worked as if I remember correctly and I recommend that you read the side of the box but one if specifically for combo feeding.

For the record my toddler is now 2yrs old and a very healthy big little boy

best of luck with OP and go with what you feel is best for you

liliq

Glowing wrote: »

Hi,

I have a lovely 6 week old daughter who I have been exclusively breastfeeding up to now. She is not a bad sleeper really, tends to wake up once or twice a night (though twice is more usual). I'm really finding things tough going however with the constant feeding during the day and the nights, and am getting so drained. I'd really love my hubby to be able to help out a bit.

I've been considering replacing her last evening feed (11pm or so) with formula or ebm (though would be difficult to express an entire feeds worth of bm in one day) - so the hubby can help while I get a headstart on some sleep - but the advice i've been reading online is so mixed and there are so many opinions and confliciting advice.

Some people are saying that replacing even one feed will affect your whole milk supply - and that introducing one bottle of formula will negate the benefits of breastfeeding with regard to babys immune system. I'm just bamboozled at this stage. Would I be mad to mess with things now since the bfeeding is going pretty well - and best to let nature take its course? I suppose the hardest part is over now, should she start spacing out her feeds now?

Sorry for the brain dump, would love to hear your advice/experiences!

Hi OP

To be honest, I think how you're feeling with the tiredness etc, is totally normal no matter how you feed your baby. I think the first 6 weeks are always the hardest, they're very intense. If you give it a week or two, I'd bet you'll find you've come over the hill, and things start getting a lot easier.
I always suggest co-sleeping- when done properly, it's very safe, and it really is a sleep saver. If it's not for you, hubby could always have the job of changing/ winding and putting baby back to bed before and after you've nursed, so he's still helping out? If he's off during the day he could also help by letting you nap with baby while he does some of the jobs around the house that you might normally do?
I combination fed for the first few weeks due to tongue tie issues causing me a lot of pain, and to be honest, it made no difference to me in the amount of rest I got. I was still waking up when the baby would wake up for the 11pm feed.
Replacing one feed CAN affect your supply- it won't DEFINITELY affect it, but it is a strong possibility.
There's also the "virgin gut" theory which is worth looking up... a bottle of formula won't negate all the benefits of breastfeeding, but it can lessen some of them as allergans can be introduced into babies system with the formula.
If it's going well, personally I would try and plough through, even for a few days, set yourself a mini goal and reassess how you feel after the weekend, or by next Friday.
But like edellc has said, every family has a different dynamic, and if something really isn't working for you, something has got to give.




Brain dumps are what forums like this are for!!

Wantobe

Replacing one feed with formula won't affect your supply if you pump. I'd recommend hiring a medical grade pump, which I did when I had my last baby. I used pumped breast milk combined with breast feeding. I didnt need to use formula because I used expressed breast milk (frozen). All I needed was a break for working, showering and sleeping from time to time. Sometimes even just the time to have a toasted sandwich and a cup of tea followed by a half an hour to snooze was all it took to keep my spirits and my strength up. Allowing my husband to feed the baby expressed milk with a bottle was good for him too. I read a lot about nipple confusion at the time but never had a problem.

I went on to breast feed ( if you include expressed milk) exclusively for 6 months and combination of breast, first foods and formula for another two months after that. She was my second and I exclusively breast fed my first for 9 months. I think I was kinder to myself on the second! Both of my girls are very healthy and happy now at 6 and 8 years old and the light of my life!

How Strange

Glowing I agree with liliq about the first 6 weeks. I found 8 wks to be the turning point and by 10 wks we were in a little routine of my son's making. Of course you're exhausted; you've just given birth and you're recovering physically as well as having to cope with a new baby as well. Give it a couple of weeks and see if you feel the same then.

I remember those first few weeks being awful and I'd be close to tears at the thoughts of the sleepless nights ahead of me. Then he stretched his feeds out a little and that extra hour of sleep at a time was enough to keep me going.

However of course that's my opinion and you have to decide what's best for you and your family.

movingsucks

I had to combine feed with formula and breast milk due to my baby's low weight gain. She was feeding all the time but not gaining so after a failed effort at expressing to increase my supply the PHN suggested I "top up" my feeds with a few ounces of formula with each feed. Never mentioned anything about me "undoing the work" of the breast milk. My baby woulda been about 5-6 weeks when this occurred. I didn't notice a difference to my supply but my supply was questionable to begin with. I ended up then in a situation later on where i would bottle feed during the day and feed her myself at night.
Oh and we used SMA gold and never a problem with constipation or wind or reflux.

Neyite

Yeah the first 6 weeks are mental all right. I felt I permanently had one boob or another out. But, a couple of weeks later it had all settled down a lot - he stretched out his feeds, slept longer at night between feeds and I got a bit more rest. There are a couple of options -

Express first thing in the morning - your supply will be best, and the milk is also richer I heard. If you use a decent pump after a day or two your supply will adjust and the amount you manage to express will increase, just dont expect heaps the first day from expressing -it takes a few days to increase volumes.

Dont feel bad if you havent enough and have to give a formula feed - but dont buy the powder just yet. You need to use it up in a month once opened, and my guy got the runs, so I switched back to the tetrapack little single feeds.

At 3 months, I gave a formula feed going to bed and still do. I use aptimal tetrapack still and it works for me.

Get Dad to do the burping, settling, and nappy changes to maximise your rest.If he doesnt know how, You-tube or google it and let him learn. This is one thing I wish I had. Dad was amazing, doing all the housework and all that, but when you are feeding seemingly for hours, then you become the only one who can burp properly or settle them to sleep you end up having very few moments of "me" time (which in those early days includes going to the bathroom, hairbrushing, and even a shower!)

The feeds WILL get shorter and more spaced. My baby at 8 weeks could empty a breast in less than 10 mins, and often went 3 hours between feeds, more at night.

Co-sleeping was not an option for us because the OH is a very deep sleeper and also smokes, but baby was beside me in the moses basket until about 3 months anyway.

Now we have a routine when baby wakes at 7am, I feed him in the bed, OH gets up with him and changes/plays, gives him his baby porridge and puts him back down for his nap at around 8.30, then gets himself ready for work. On the next waking, I take over so I have a nice snooze until about 9 or 9.30. In the evenings Dad comes home, and I handover to Dad for playtime and start dinner, giving me a break, we bath baby together, get him in his growbag while dinner is on, he gets his last feed as a formula bottle at 7.30pm and usually goes to sleep shortly after around 8pm. So that way, baby and Dad get quality time together too.

And finally. Ignore the housework. Totally. In the early days when I nursed constantly I did, and you need to. Down the line you can become as much of a domestic goddess as you like but for now, be kind to yourself

Glowing

Thanks so much for all the replies everyone, great to hear your experiences. Managed to express loads over the last few days so wont be going down the formula route unless we run out of BM (we have some Aptimil cartons too)

Anyway we have a new problem to contend with - despite all my best laid plans, I went out to a pilates class last night and left DH with baby and some EBM but despite having taken a bottle for the last 5 weeks, she point blank refused it last night and screamed the house down for an hour! Hubby was well frazled by the time I got back

Im really panicking now as having some time to myself (or at least the option!) is the only thing keeping me sane! Using the Dr. Brown bottles which she had no problems with up to now.

What should I do? Keep perserving with the bottle?

movingsucks

Is she still refusing for you now? Do you need to heat the bottle or anything that your husband may have missed?

Glowing

movingsucks wrote: »

Is she still refusing for you now? Do you need to heat the bottle or anything that your husband may have missed?

I havent tried her again today as I've been out all day but intend on trying again this evening when DH is home ... am hoping she was just too agitated yday as she did have bad wind before the feed apparently.

Im nearly afraid to try in case she refuses again ..

wmpdd3

Isn't it always the same?!! You come back in the door, ask how she was and you know by the look of helplessness that she cried!

It happened so much with me and my two, but dont let it get you other half down. Its not like TV where you shove the bottle in and after a burp, baby falls asleep.

I suggest you try giving her the bottle this evening and then move to your other half giving her the bottle, take baby steps!

Charl0tte

I admire you for keeping her on the breast, really do. I had some very big babies, and they nearly killed me with exhaustion. I was lucky to get 2 hours out of them before they wanted feeding again, and this turned me to using the bottle. I couldn't actually function any more. I don't have any great advice for you here, but I'd welcome the odd bottle or two if you can, just so you can get some rest. If you express it will keep up your supply, so don't worry too much.