Car rear-ended with baby on board

IsItJustMeOr...

Hi...

During the week someone rear-ended my car with my small baby on board.
It felt like an awful impact but was probably around 20k. Thank God my baby was checked at the scene and in hospital and is fine but this has freaked the life out of me!

Today I've to take him out in the hire car for the first time and I'm as nervous as hell! From anyone who's been there, I take it this is normal? I've an awful fear someone will rear-end us again but I don't want to be driving like a bag of nerves. I have gone from super confident driver to crap! My husband has been a sh*t since it happened so I've no support there and don't have anyone to come with me today.

I need to do this. Any tips apart from don't have a freak attack?!

paddy147

IsItJustMeOr... wrote: »

Hi...

During the week someone rear-ended my car with my small baby on board.
It felt like an awful impact but was probably around 20k. Thank God my baby was checked at the scene and in hospital and is fine but this has freaked the life out of me!

Today I've to take him out in the hire car for the first time and I'm as nervous as hell! From anyone who's been there, I take it this is normal? I've an awful fear someone will rear-end us again but I don't want to be driving like a bag of nerves. I have gone from super confident driver to crap! My husband has been a sh*t since it happened so I've no support there and don't have anyone to come with me today.

I need to do this. Any tips apart from don't have a freak attack?!

If you are that nervous and fearfull,then simply dont drive the car.

Im not saying that you would,but you could actualy cause a crash,if you are in a state of fear.



Walk with your baby in the pram or else get public transport.

Then when you get back home,go out in the hire car yourself around the housing estate or the local roads and get your confidence back,at your own pace and in your own time.

maynooth_rules

I was involved in an accident a little over a month ago where I was T Boned by a truck into my drivers door while I was turning right. Really knocked my confidence on the road for the first 4-5 days of driving. After that I was fine though. Has highlighted to me how much trust you put in other drivers on the road doing the right thing though

Hal1

Sorry to hear about this OP glad all are well though. It might be an idea to arrange a lesson or two with a driving instructor, just until you get some confidence back on the road .

keithclancy

Go out and do it sooner rather than later, maybe with an instructor as stated previously.

The longer you leave it, the worse it will be.

The Big Red Button

Is there any chance you could get someone to mind the baby for a bit, just so you could go out for even just a quick spin on your own, and get comfortable with driving again? Before you have the baby with you to worry about, as well?

As others have suggested, having an instructor with you, even for an hour, might be a very worthwhile investment. Just to help you get your confidence back!

Lingua Franca

It's perfectly normal and paddy147's advice is great. You need to motor about on your own a wee bit to feel better.

slarkin123

That happened to me when my daughter was a few weeks old. Don't make the mistake i made, i didn't get back in a car for about 3 years. All i can say to you is get back out there quickly. Deep down you know you're a good confidant driver. The nerves will eventually pass, its just like being a beginner again. Please please please don't let this put you off the way it did to me.

Hal Decks

I don't get the abuse of the hubby, OP. Getting back in the saddle is the best thing you can do, as soon as you can.

And, get something substantial to replace the damaged car, your child deserves a large crumple zone in case of a reoccurrence. Most small cars are useless for safety.

IsItJustMeOr...

Thanks all for your replies and advice. Appreciate it!

I drove it from the rental premises yesterday and couldn't wait to get out of it!!! I did hate it.

Yeah I think I'll leave the baby at home and go out again myself later and see how I get on because right now I'm scared to put him in it and its no good driving with a baby feeling like that!

Guy:Incognito

I had a fairy bad crash about 10 years ago. I found the easiest thing for me was heading straight back home and getting in to another car (I crashed in my dads, went and got my own) and get straight driving again. I'd to drop my documents to the Garda station so went straight about it. Don't know if I'd have left it a while would I have been thinking about it too much or not. Might not work for everyone, I tend not to be much of a worrier anyway.

colm_mcm

If you look at it statistically, we're gonna all get shunted at some stage. You've gotten yours out of the way now and the chances of it happening again are very small. Its a traumatic thing and having your child in the car must have multiplied that.

The only advise I can give is to leave a lot of room between you and the car in front of you so as to try and avoid any sudden braking or slowing down.

If your nerves are affecting your driving, then go for some drives without your child and get your confidence back up again.

Lawless2k12

Understandable to be nervous OP. I had a crash a few months ago and it rattled me. Just got straight back behind the wheel. Did a lot of town driving as I felt comfortable there. After about a week went back onto the open country roads felt alright. I've only been driving a couple of years so it was a real shock to the system. The worst thing that can happen is to not have support though. Find someone to go with you if your that nervous. Leave your kid with your husband. He obviously doesn't understand or something but a lot of people are able to just walk away from a crash without batting an eyelid. Main thing is you don't become terrified of driving and end up staying away from a car for several years. Just my 2 cents

This happens everybody and its normal to feel like that for a while afterwards. The important thing is to get back out there. If the baby is making you nervous, go out on your own for a while first. A baby in a proper child seat is safer that you or i would be, so worry about yourself first.
Your hubby isn't giving you any sympathy cos he knows that youre a decent driver and if you (or any of us) give into these fears they end up ruling us.

Squatman

colm_mcm wrote: »

If you look at it statistically, we're gonna all get shunted at some stage. You've gotten yours out of the way now and the chances of it happening again are very small.

Thats very flawed logic - the chances of this happening again are completely unrelated to past occurances - time to brush up on probability theory while you're studying statistics!

Mycroft H

Squatman wrote: »

Thats very flawed logic - the chances of this happening again are completely unrelated to past occurances - time to brush up on probability theory while you're studying statistics!

Exactly. If I win the lotto tomorrow, it doesn't make it any less likely that I'll win it again in the future at some point.

colm_mcm

Squatman wrote: »

Thats very flawed logic - the chances of this happening again are completely unrelated to past occurances - time to brush up on probability theory while you're studying statistics!

Awesome. You're a great help to the OP I'm sure.

caprilicious

I agree with the previous posters that suggest getting a bit of time out in the car without baby to build up your confidence.

I had a head on crash a few years ago & it put the fear of God into me every time I drove for several weeks afterwards.
I think it's only natural after the shock you get, it does go away in time though.

I'm glad you and your baby were unharmed. Take care

Squatman

colm_mcm wrote: »

Awesome. You're a great help to the OP I'm sure.

Well at least I'm not educating the OP with the Dummies Retards Guide to Probability:rolleyes:

Markcheese

After a serious impact get a new car seat for the baby...if your baby is over 1( and normaly into a forward facing seat) you can get a special back facing seat for toddlers.. They're huge and a bit pricey but unreally safe ... A good seat should help you not have to worry about baby so much !!! Go into a car seat specialist,( we used Tony keally found them great, but there's mothercare,halfords ect) ... Just do what you can on your end.. And the rest is dumb luck ...(could stay in your home and have something happen there, you've gotta live) . Blokes point of view though .. Good luck.

alexonhisown

Glad to hear baby was fine. I was also a nervous wreck driving after someone ran into my car last year. It really changed the way i drive even though it wasnt my fault. Took a week or two to get a bit of confidence back. You will be fine.

Ellsbells

I just bought a rear facing car seat for my 10 month old as he has grown out of the rear facing baby seat. I did my research and they perform better in tests than front facing seats. Obviously you can never eliminate risk but hopefully you can install the correct equipment to protect the baby as much as possible should the unfortunate ever happen again.

corktina

Markcheese wrote: »

After a serious impact get a new car seat for the baby...if your baby is over 1( and normaly into a forward facing seat) you can get a special back facing seat for toddlers.. They're huge and a bit pricey but unreally safe ... A good seat should help you not have to worry about baby so much !!! Go into a car seat specialist,( we used Tony keally found them great, but there's mothercare,halfords ect) ... Just do what you can on your end.. And the rest is dumb luck ...(could stay in your home and have something happen there, you've gotta live) . Blokes point of view though .. Good luck.

yepp bin the seat just in case, but take a hammer to it just in case someone recycles it

Soarer

Did you have a "baby on board" sign? Just wondering if they work!

More seriously, glad you're ok. Was rear ended myself a few years back and it really does give your confidence a kick in the balls. Gotta get straight back out there again though. You'll forget it happened in a few months.

IsItJustMeOr...

Thanks guys for all the positive and helpful replies. It helps!

I ventured out but embarrassed to say I was very panicky and parked up for 30 mins...I was nearly going to get a taxi home and leave the car were it was but figured that would only make things worse. I'll go again tomorrow but feeling like this, baby may be staying at home for a few days. Probably doesn't help either being in an unfamiliar hire car.

Christ there is no worse feeling in the world than seeing the car in the rearview, feeling that impact and knowing you've a 6 month old in the back! It's horrendous! I can't get it out if my head. Number one thing is that my baby is fine.

Markcheese, In regards to car seats, thankfully he was in a very secure isofix rear facing system. But yes, I've replaced the base and seat as there is no way I'd put him back into the other system.

McCrack

OP I would suggest getting professional advice (from a GP & from a personal injury solicitor).

_Kaiser_

McCrack wrote: »

OP I would suggest getting professional advice (from a GP & from a personal injury solicitor).

Why? Herself and the little fella are ok (thankfully and that's the main thing). She just needs to give herself a chance after a bad scare which is completely understandable and echoed by others in the thread.

This 'you might be entitled to claim' attitude sickens me and ultimately I doubt any amount of cash will help the OP feel more confident behind the wheel anyway.

McCrack

Kaiser2000 wrote: »

Why? Herself and the little fella are ok (thankfully and that's the main thing). She just needs to give herself a chance after a bad scare which is completely understandable and echoed by others in the thread.

This 'you might be entitled to claim' attitude sickens me and ultimately I doubt any amount of cash will help the OP feel more confident behind the wheel anyway.

Thanks for your diagnosis.

Quite clearly the OP is anxious at a minimum. She should seek medical advice. She should also seek legal advice too. Compensation is recoverable for mental injury as much as it can be for physical, but you knew that...

Indricotherium

colm_mcm wrote: »

Awesome. You're a great help to the OP I'm sure.

In all fairness presenting a false statistical argument is not much help either.

bluecode

I was rearended some years ago, while stopped at a red light by a van. Shoved forward into a woman's car who had a child onboard. It was a bit traumatic seeing that van in my rear view mirror with nothing I could do. But I drove home in the car. It was wrecked but driveable strangely. The real trauma came later when the moron in the van later claimed I had hit the car in front and then reversed into him! Then I was ripped off by the insurance company and solicitor.

But if there's a positive it was that I drove defensively after that. I became very aware of drivers behind me. This may have later saved me and my wife from injury or worse when I realised that a jeep behind me was never going to stop in time so I pulled out from behind a car and escaped. He hit the car that had been in front of me. I hate to think how hard he'd have hit me if I'd stayed there.

On another positive note. I frequently suffered from back pain up until that and indeed had been out of work for it just before the accident and was still in pain on the day. After the accident the pain went and rarely came back since. The impact somehow fixed the problem! A rare thing indeed.

Cuddlesworth

IsItJustMeOr... wrote: »

Markcheese, In regards to car seats, thankfully he was in a very secure isofix rear facing system. But yes, I've replaced the base and seat as there is no way I'd put him back into the other system.

Don't forget to be reimbursed for the replacements from the other drivers insurance.

_Kaiser_

McCrack wrote: »

Thanks for your diagnosis.

Quite clearly the OP is anxious at a minimum. She should seek medical advice. She should also seek legal advice too. Compensation is recoverable for mental injury as much as it can be for physical, but you knew that...

It's this sort of attitude that is partly to blame for the reason that we all pay so much in insurance.

The OP has made no mention of physical injury to herself or her son, and doesn't strike me as 'traumatised' in her posts, just understandably shaken after the accident.

Running off to the local ambulance chaser won't solve that, but you knew that too, right?

McCrack

Kaiser2000 wrote: »

It's this sort of attitude that is partly to blame for the reason that we all pay so much in insurance.

The OP has made no mention of physical injury to herself or her son, and doesn't strike me as 'traumatised' in her posts, just understandably shaken after the accident.

Running off to the local ambulance chaser won't solve that, but you knew that too, right?

Insurance is there for a reason, some twat rear-ends the OP with her baby in the car, OP has said she is now nervous/anxious and you think she is ok and shouldn't take medical and legal advice on the matter?

Berty

Soarer wrote: »

Did you have a "baby on board" sign? Just wondering if they work!

Baby on board signs are simply for Emergency services to know that there is a baby "on board" the vehicle and, where possible, concentrate their efforts FIRST to the baby.

Baby on board signs are seen by people as a way of telling other drivers "keep away from my car".

slimjimmc

Beer Baron wrote: »

Baby on board signs are simply for Emergency services to know that there is a baby "on board" the vehicle and, where possible, concentrate their efforts FIRST to the baby.

Baby on board signs are seen by people as a way of telling other drivers "keep away from my car".

Myth.
The ES always check for any occupants big or small (the sign might not even be visible after the impact) and then attend to those who need them first (that may not be the baby). Having a sign up doesn't even mean there is a baby on board at the time of collision.