Civil ceremony in a restaurant - what would it be like?

Eibhlin2011

Hi

Just wondering if anyone has been to a civil ceremony held in a restaurant - and what was it like. There's a lovely restaurant in - town not far from me that does civil ceremonys - and I'm considering getting married there. I'm going to phone the restaurant soon to talk to them about it - but just would like to hear from other people first.

Does the bride always wear a white dress or would it be ok just to get really dressed up. Part of me couldn't be bothered with the white dress - but a big part of me is self-conscious that people will think its strange - I know I shouldn't care what people think but for some reason it bothers me.

Does it work out cheaper than a traditional church wedding - we'd probably have 100 people for a meal at €60 a head. We won't have to get a wedding car, won't need to decorate a church etc. a friend of ours is a professional photographer and he'd do the pictures for us. I wouldn't be bothered with a videographer.

Is the ceremony really quick & boring compared to a church service? Is there anyway to make it less 'boring'. I wouldn't be in to writing my own romantic vows or anything like that! Maybe music or something?

Do people give speeches, have a bestman, bridesmaids etc. Personally I'd like to keep it really casual and do without all that.

Is it normal to do the service first and then the meal?

The place I'm looking at does a bar extension - but would people get bored if they're stuck in one venue all day? For a church wedding you have to get to the church - then you take a break to get to the reception venue - so it's a long day but its broken up.

I kind of just want to get married and have a party with family & friends to celebrate - I'm not really into colour schemes - or getting perfect photos - etc etc - but I want people to enjoy themselves. I don't care if its not the best wedding they've ever been too as long as its not boring!

I've photographed a few civil ceremonies. All have been in hotel function rooms or rooms designated to ceremonies, but id imagine the restaurant is the same (I doubt they'll have you getting married with waiters weaving in and out of you serving plates of food, so i'd imagine you'll be in a room separate to the actual restaurant?).

The ceremony is usually about 15-20 minutes in my experience. Sometimes shorter. You can change them about a bit, but so far I've seen no vows being said, and not all of my brides have been wearing typical wedding dresses (last one I did, the bride just wore a nice dress, there was no train or anything).

I haven't stayed for the full day for any of the civil ceremonies I've done, but I believe that the jist is that people tend to stay in the same place all day, or after the ceremony there's a meal, and everyone tends to slowly disband off home.

Bride has always had her own arrival, though, in my experience (not always in a fancy car or anything, general saloon car seems to do the job) but that'd be something to consider if necessary (my civil ceremonies have ranged from car hire to a friend's car to a bridesmaid driving).



To be honest, though. Whilst I doubt I'll ever get married, if I was planning a wedding, worrying whether or not my guests would be bored would be fairly low down on my list of considerations for whatever I had planned. It's your wedding. No matter what you do you're not going to please everyone, anyway, so just do whatever you want and have your wedding day the way you want it. I know I would.

John Mason

we got married in pub last April and it was great.

I didnt wear white, just wore a nice dress.

it worked out a lot cheaper for us. Our service was about 15-20 mins. we had 2 funny readings.

we had CD player for music, walking down, signing the register and for the end.again, the music was no traditional.

you can do whatever you like

liliq

My cousin got married in a reseraunt in London... it was lovely. It was in a seperate room to the actual resteraunt. Had the ceremony, took a few pictures, sat down and had a lovely meal.
There were only about 25 or 30 at his wedding.

I'm having a civil ceremony wedding in a few weeks. The ceremony itself is very basic, but you can add readings/ music to personalise it as long as they aren't religious... they have to be approved by the solemniser 3 weeks in advance.
We are having the ceremony and reception in the same place as well... I wouldn't be worried about people getting bored in the same place. I think it's one of the perks of having in a civil ceremony that you CAN stay in one place. There's no sat naving involved between the wedding and the reception!
The civil ceremony times off site (not in a registry office) are 1230 and 330pm. We opted for the 330, it'll be les than 20 minutes including music, so there's less waiting around for a meal hours later.
Regarding what to wear... I'm wearing a traditional dress- got a bit caught up in the whole thing! haha. But it's defintely not a requirement! I half joked( but was half serious) with my mother in law to be that I was going to get a nice new pair of skinny jeans to get married in instead of a dress.

Like has been said, it's your day, your party, do it your way!

clint_silver

irishbird wrote: »

you can do whatever you like

sums it up, can wear whatever you want, can set a theme if you want (black tie, 20s, 70s, whatever).. can have a speech or not, can cut cake or not...there are no rules.

if youre having a good few there, maybe try and make sure restaraunt has a PA system or people will struggle to hear any speeches.

Senna

Eibhlin2011 wrote: »

There's a lovely restaurant in - town not far from me that does civil ceremonys

Phone them and ask when the next ceremony is taking place and can you come down to view the room before the ceremony.

Eibhlin2011

KKV wrote: »

I've photographed a few civil ceremonies. All have been in hotel function rooms or rooms designated to ceremonies, but id imagine the restaurant is the same (I doubt they'll have you getting married with waiters weaving in and out of you serving plates of food, so i'd imagine you'll be in a room separate to the actual restaurant?).

The ceremony is usually about 15-20 minutes in my experience. Sometimes shorter. You can change them about a bit, but so far I've seen no vows being said, and not all of my brides have been wearing typical wedding dresses (last one I did, the bride just wore a nice dress, there was no train or anything).

I haven't stayed for the full day for any of the civil ceremonies I've done, but I believe that the jist is that people tend to stay in the same place all day, or after the ceremony there's a meal, and everyone tends to slowly disband off home.

Bride has always had her own arrival, though, in my experience (not always in a fancy car or anything, general saloon car seems to do the job) but that'd be something to consider if necessary (my civil ceremonies have ranged from car hire to a friend's car to a bridesmaid driving).



To be honest, though. Whilst I doubt I'll ever get married, if I was planning a wedding, worrying whether or not my guests would be bored would be fairly low down on my list of considerations for whatever I had planned. It's your wedding. No matter what you do you're not going to please everyone, anyway, so just do whatever you want and have your wedding day the way you want it. I know I would.

Hi - Thanks for that - I suppose it makes sense that it would be done in a room separate from the restaurant - for some reason I was imagining everyone sitting at the tables where they'd have dinner when the ceremony was going in - which would be a bit strange.

Eibhlin2011

irishbird wrote: »

we got married in pub last April and it was great.

I didnt wear white, just wore a nice dress.

it worked out a lot cheaper for us. Our service was about 15-20 mins. we had 2 funny readings.

we had CD player for music, walking down, signing the register and for the end.again, the music was no traditional.

you can do whatever you like

That sounds nice and relaxed - I think I could enjoy a wedding like that. If I did a big one I know I'd be really stressed - as well as it costing so much money

Eibhlin2011

liliq wrote: »

My cousin got married in a reseraunt in London... it was lovely. It was in a seperate room to the actual resteraunt. Had the ceremony, took a few pictures, sat down and had a lovely meal.
There were only about 25 or 30 at his wedding.

I'm having a civil ceremony wedding in a few weeks. The ceremony itself is very basic, but you can add readings/ music to personalise it as long as they aren't religious... they have to be approved by the solemniser 3 weeks in advance.
We are having the ceremony and reception in the same place as well... I wouldn't be worried about people getting bored in the same place. I think it's one of the perks of having in a civil ceremony that you CAN stay in one place. There's no sat naving involved between the wedding and the reception!
The civil ceremony times off site (not in a registry office) are 1230 and 330pm. We opted for the 330, it'll be les than 20 minutes including music, so there's less waiting around for a meal hours later.
Regarding what to wear... I'm wearing a traditional dress- got a bit caught up in the whole thing! haha. But it's defintely not a requirement! I half joked( but was half serious) with my mother in law to be that I was going to get a nice new pair of skinny jeans to get married in instead of a dress.

Like has been said, it's your day, your party, do it your way!

Hi - That sounds great too - I think I'll do something similar. What sort of music are you having at the ceremony? And what will you be doing after the meal

Eibhlin2011

clint_silver wrote: »

sums it up, can wear whatever you want, can set a theme if you want (black tie, 20s, 70s, whatever).. can have a speech or not, can cut cake or not...there are no rules.

if youre having a good few there, maybe try and make sure restaraunt has a PA system or people will struggle to hear any speeches.

Good point about the PA system - I think this place has done plenty of weddings so hopefully they're well set up.

Eibhlin2011

Senna wrote: »

Phone them and ask when the next ceremony is taking place and can you come down to view the room before the ceremony.

Good idea.

We might also go there for a meal this weekend to have a look at the place - and then if we like it we can phone them next week

dub8

like the other posters said , its your day , do it our way! Wear what you feel comfortable and happy in , if you and your h2b are happy for the day , your guests will be happy ! Im having a small wedding ( approx 45 people for civil ceremony and dinner ) all in the one place . Am wearing the traditional gear , had originally thought of going for something a bit different loved my dress when i tried it on! Our venue is also a restuarent but doesnt open to public until 6 so worries about random people arriving during ceremony! The thoughts of a big wedding completly stressed me out , i never like being centre of attention and having over a hundred people looking at me .... oh god ! felt a massive weight of my shoulders once we decided on our venue and wedding ! So go with what you are happy with and dont mind anyone else ! Can a ask what venue you were thinking of ?

liliq

Eibhlin2011 wrote: »

Hi - That sounds great too - I think I'll do something similar. What sort of music are you having at the ceremony? And what will you be doing after the meal

Havent decided on music yet! Need to get into gear though and let them know asap. whatever it is will just be played off an ipod though!
We're having it in a venuey type place, so apart from the ceremony, will be traditional enough.

My cousins wedding just had an extended relaxed meal though, and stayed in the resteraunt and had drinks after. It was lovely, really relaxed.

pwurple

I was at a lovely wedding a few weeks ago in a restaurant in Cork. They had the tables removed in the dining room and rearranged the chairs for the ceremony. When that was over everyone came out to the bar area and sparkling wine was served. The tables were out back in and the room made ready for dinner.
After dinner, there was another bar downstairs where there was music playing and people could dance or relax.

It was really yummy food, in a gorgeous setting. Couldn't fault this restsurant as a wedding venue.

For your other questions, the bride in that one did wear white, but it was a short dress... Just above knee length. No idea on cost. Cost is usually based on the number of guests you are buying dinner for, so I guess in a restaurant it is fewer. Ceremony wasn't boring, there were nice readings from family and friends. As a guest, i enjoyed it.