4yo won't eat dinners :(

Mola1

Now as the title says my 4yo eats next to nothing during the day and he's very reluctant to try new foods,breakfast is fine usually muesli or porridge,lunch yoghurt,sandwich cheese grapes,raisins etc but dinner is a nightmare,he's so fussy he won't any kind of pasta,he's not fussed on pork only veg he will eat is sweetcorn maybe peas.. I'm really worried about him because I know his diet isint good.. oh he's 105cms and around 2st 10 so I don't think he's under weight so much.. I'd love to know if anyone else has overcome a problem like this!

yellowlabrador

My little girl went through a faze of only eating cheese and ham sandwiches and fruit. She was tall for her age and normal weight. She was also very active. I took her to the doctor and he thought she was fine. I look back and realize that we were brought up to finish full plates of dinner and maybe we as a result give children too much and it puts them off. My advise is to make meals a social occasion. The whole family together, eating the same food together. I wouldn't offer anything different, pot luck as it is. I would put a small portion on your sons plate and then ignore him. Clear the table when everyone leaves and don't mention what he's not eaten. Don't make food an issue, he'll eventually eat everything, and you'll be back posting in 10 years time about how many loaves of bread and boxes of cereal you get through.

Moonbeam

My 3 year old has decided that she hates veg and is not a fan of fruit but likes bananas,potatoes and apples.
I feed all the kids dinner together and give them small portions so they can ask for more rather then have war for not eating dinner
She mostly eats what I give her but I no longer force the veg once everything else is eaten.
She will grow out of it,hopefully:)

She loves breakfast,crackers,yogurts and sandwiches.

I would not worry and would serve up dinner to him the same as everyone else and reward him for eating rather then punish him for not.

Mola1

I think I've tried every tactic at this stage,he loves fruit which is a good thing but the veg is a no go but I was the same until recently. I just wonder how they survive of such little food and still have tonnes of energy

SusieBlue

I don't have much advice, only to maybe hide the veg in his food? I know my sister blends up lots of veggies and mashes them into potatoes and calls it rainbow potatoes, and my niece doesn't even realise what she's eating. Maybe you could try something like that? Good luck with it!

bullvine

my younglad is 3 next week, eats everything in creche, I mean everything but cant get him to eat anything at home except toast, french fries, spagetti hoops and some fruits, I'm just hoping he grows into it!

Ddad

I have two boys and a girl and I used to bend over backwards to give them different foods that they liked and they'd eat. One would eat no pasta or rice just spuds and another would only eat mash. Another would announce a new food they disliked that they had previously eaten. There are no allergies or intolerances in the house.

I like food to be interesting and I like the family to eat together and enjoy their food. I also hate loads of conflict at dinner time. The situation was wrecking my head and leading to a lot of stress.

So this is what I did.

Every day I'd present a two course dinner. Dinner or nothing. You could eat it, and have the option of something else to eat as well. If you were still hungry. If you didn't eat it that was that. I'd clear down and leave the plate of dinner aside in case they'd have another cut at it. I wouldn't reheat it though. No drama, no roaring, the choice rested with them. Lots of praise for havig a go and nothing for leaving the dinner.

Another thing I did is I recognised that not everyone is going to like everything so if one of them persistently dislike something and wouldn't/ couldn't stomach it for months I'd sub in something else e.g. one of the boys has peas instead of cabbage with ham, these are rare exceptions though. It took months but now we all eat pasta, rice, chilli, curry, stews all with lots of vegetables. My eldest fella will eat pretty much anything if he's allowed to approach it cautiously on his own terms at first.

What I'll often do when they're having something new is I'll put it on the dinner plate and tell them that they have to try it bt they're not expected to finish it if they don't want. You win some and loose some; but, you get a lot more winners over time than losers.

I think it's really important that the foods aren't too challenging and are palatable e.g. I won't like eating frozen broccoli thats stewed in unseasoned water for half an hour so the kids are hardly going to. I also avoided strong flavours initially so curry was a korma and we ramped up to beef and guinness stew.

I wouldn't say all meals are harmonious but last night we had rosemary and garlic roast lamb, peas, broccoli, mangetout, mash potatoes, roasted sweet potatoes and red wine gravy and they all ate it. Five clean plates and loads of request for seconds. Two years ago not a hope.

BusyMum12

I recommend the book 'My child won't eat' by Dr. Carlos Gonzalez. It really put my mind at ease with my eldest daughter.

Don't worry about it anyway.

Mine is 8 now and it's a struggle to keep her out of the fridge

How Strange

That's a brilliant book. It should be handed out to every new parent before they leave hospital. It'd save a lot of anguish later on.

Ddad you seem to have cracked it alright. My son is only a toddler and I devjnity agree with the one choice yet relaxed approach. Even at this early stage we've had times where he won't eat for me and I've had to walk away. He eats everything in crèche.

I love vegetables. They're my favourite food but I hated them as a child. I had to eat them but I hated them.

I remember crying at the injustice of having to eat turnip and mash because someone told me that the Belgians feed turnips to their cows. Now I love turnip and mash! I think veg is an acquired taste for kids do while you should always put it on the plate I wouldn't stress if they make faces at the thoughts of eating it.

Ddad

Yeah, I'm having a laugh to myself thinking about the turnip. Hated it and still wouldn't be a great lover to this day. Hence I don't force them to eat stuff they've tried but still dislike. I haven't read that book but anything that works towards getting your children eating a decent varied diet is worth a go.

When my sister was eighteen we took her to Paris after her leaving as a treat. She was spoilt and allowed to be a ridiculously picky eater as she was the only child at home for ten years after we all moved on. We went to an Italian restaurant one night and it had numbers to correspond to each dish on the menu. In total they had 230 different dishes to choose from and she couldn't eat any of them because she was so picky. Ended up eating the broth from a bowl of minestrone with us rolling our eyes. She'd eat anything now pretty much but it took ten years for her to get to the stage where you didn't have to sieve the onions from her gravy:rolleyes:.

I think it's something better tackled young.

Mola1

Ddad great advice,thank you! Well he ate at grannys last night and he cleared his plate aswell as some of mine I was delighted,although other might be saying something for my cooking we will get there with time.

One thing I have found helped me - but then I found it helped other people when I suggested it to them and then later I saw it also suggested by Supernanny (I point out that this happened later because I do not actually take hints from supernanny often but I do like when I see something I hit on myself showing up then later on her show) - is to get the children involved as much as possible in the cooking process.

Even from age 2 this can be done from stiring things to breaking eggs to sprinkling herbs and salt and pepper to rubbing dough to much more. And of course licking all the spoons and bowls!

This will not magically solve all your problems but I have found that if you get them involved in the entire thing and make it all as much fun as possible they are then somewhat more willing to try new things or even retry old things.

This also benefitted me. As when you are cooking normally your toddlers and vying for your attention too. You can not do two things at once and they end up upset, you end up stressed and its a vicious circle. When they are involved they are occupied and though supervising them does make cooking more difficult than if they were entirely absent - it is certainly a LOT less difficult than trying to entertain them seperately and keep them happy while you are cooking alone.

And everyone being less stressed by the cooking experience ALSO lends itself to them being more willing to eat. A happy child will eat more readily than a stressed out one.

Sleepy

My daughter's odd one is decent meat, she'll eat chicken gougons or sausages like they're going out of fashion but put a roast, spag bol, chilli in front of her and she'll stick to the spuds / veg / pasta and we'll find any mince / meat she's eaten as a chewed mess in her mouth after she's "full" (but still looking for dessert! lol). On a couple of occasions when we've forgotten to check, it's been hours later and she'll ask if she can spit out the food that still in her mouth!

How Strange

That's so cute sleepy. I suppose if she chews the food then she's getting all the goodness out of it anyway.