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  • 12-10-2012 9:05am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 36 ladam


    I have to go to a funeral today and only found out the arrangements of it last night(late notice but there were some complications)!! I rang in to work this morning and i was shouted at down the phone that I had to come in. I explained that I couldnt and told her about the day (service in the house then funeral home then church) so no way I could get it! My manager kept shouting at me that I was taking a unauthorised day off! Besides the fact that the funeral in question is for someone who i'm close to and i'm quite upset about it all, she cant tell me i cant go right?? I didnt take time off when he died or anything just this one day! I feel very upset with the way i was spoken to and the fact that she made me feel bad about needing the day!
    Is this right? Thanks


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,844 ✭✭✭Honey-ec


    ladam wrote: »
    I have to go to a funeral today and only found out the arrangements of it last night(late notice but there were some complications)!! I rang in to work this morning and i was shouted at down the phone that I had to come in. I explained that I couldnt and told her about the day (service in the house then funeral home then church) so no way I could get it! My manager kept shouting at me that I was taking a unauthorised day off! Besides the fact that the funeral in question is for someone who i'm close to and i'm quite upset about it all, she cant tell me i cant go right?? I didnt take time off when he died or anything just this one day! I feel very upset with the way i was spoken to and the fact that she made me feel bad about needing the day!
    Is this right? Thanks

    Unless there's a compassionate leave policy in place that states you can take time off for a bereavement (and if there is, how long you get usually depends on your relationship to the deceased), they can pretty much do what they want.

    However, it's a pretty nasty manager who wouldn't let you take a half-day out of your annual leave to attend a funeral.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,295 ✭✭✭✭Mrs OBumble


    Honey-ec wrote: »
    Unless there's a compassionate leave policy in place that states you can take time off for a bereavement (and if there is, how long you get usually depends on your relationship to the deceased), they can pretty much do what they want.

    However, it's a pretty nasty manager who wouldn't let you take a half-day out of your annual leave to attend a funeral.

    Yes it may sound nasty. But, OP:

    Did you make your manager aware of the death at the time that it happened?

    Did you warn then that you would be needing some leave to attend the funeral, but weren't sure when it would be?

    Is this person actually a close relative? No compassionate leave policy I've ever heard of allows you leave for someone who's not a relative. And most annual leave policies require you to give more notice than you have done.

    Expect to face some consequences when you return to work.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,512 ✭✭✭runawaybishop


    ladam wrote: »
    I have to go to a funeral today and only found out the arrangements of it last night(late notice but there were some complications)!! I rang in to work this morning and i was shouted at down the phone that I had to come in. I explained that I couldnt and told her about the day (service in the house then funeral home then church) so no way I could get it! My manager kept shouting at me that I was taking a unauthorised day off! Besides the fact that the funeral in question is for someone who i'm close to and i'm quite upset about it all, she cant tell me i cant go right?? I didnt take time off when he died or anything just this one day! I feel very upset with the way i was spoken to and the fact that she made me feel bad about needing the day!
    Is this right? Thanks

    Unless you have a compassionate leave clause in your contract your manager is fully within her rights. Even with such a clause your notice is severely lacking.

    http://www.citizensinformationboard.ie/publications/providers/booklets/entitlements_employmentrights/publications_entitlements_employmentrights11.html#3


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,410 ✭✭✭bbam


    This is a common gripe with people..
    The truth is you'd like to go to the funeral rather than you have to go. In the past I've always tried to facilitate people with late requests but its not always feesable, sometimes there is no option but to have the employee come in...
    Late requests make planning a business very diffocult..

    Go to work and make your apologies to the family that you couldn't get the day off...


  • Posts: 0 CMod ✭✭✭✭ Jason Rhythmic Plastic


    It might not be nice but ringing in to say out of the blue you're not coming in, that's just not coming in. Last time I wanted to go to a funeral of someone very close, I asked the day before could I come in extra early and leave early so it wouldn't be too put out, funeral wasn't til 12 I think.
    Ringing in that morning? just no. Even if you didn't know the exact details you could have let them know in advance you'd want to go to a funeral sometime that week.


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  • Registered Users, Subscribers, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,632 ✭✭✭✭antodeco


    Bereavement policy only applies to very close relatives (think 1 step removed as its no longer classed as 'close').

    Force Majoure leave only applies when you literally can't come in because you HAVE to have the time off. (think a hospitalised partner and someone needs to mind your child).

    Compassionate leave is at the discretion of the manager and is normally heavily linked to force Majoure.

    The only one you are close to here is compassionate leave. But as mentioned, it's at the discretion of the manager.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,921 ✭✭✭✭hdowney


    Agree with everyone here. You basically dumped your employer in it. I don't know what line of work you are in, but if you were in retail or something, how do you expect your employer to get someone to cover your shift with this last minute notice? I am sorry but it seems very selfish of you


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,224 ✭✭✭Procrastastudy


    No one can stop you from going. What consequences you ill face upon your return will come down to various factors. One of which has been mentioned already - did you keep your boss in the loop on what was going on?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,332 ✭✭✭tatli_lokma


    ladam wrote: »
    I explained that I couldnt and told her about the day (service in the house then funeral home then church) so no way I could get it! My manager kept shouting at me that I was taking a unauthorised day off! .......she made me feel bad about needing the day!
    Is this right? Thanks


    First off, unless you are the priest or undertaker, you do not need to be at all stages of the day. You can go to one or other of the things. Secondly, even if you didn't know the arrangements til this morning, that is not your managers problem. You knew the person had died, you could have at least given her a heads up that you would like to take the day of the funeral off and as soon as you knew what day that would be you would tell her. Thirdly, why didn't you make it your business to find out the arrangements if it meant that much to you to go?

    You do not NEED the day, you want the day. And unless you are really close to this person and obviously very distraught and upset by the loss, it looks like you just don't want to miss out on the wake. And if you are that upset and distraught about the loss, my sincere sympathies, but in that case your manager will also have seen how you are the last few days and would be unlikely to shout at you down the phone. If you haven't seemed that bothered or upset in the last few days, you can understand why claims of having to go to the funeral and being so upset would fall on deaf ears.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    Could you not have just gone to the service in the house and then on in to work?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,260 ✭✭✭Irish_Elect_Eng


    Using dead relatives to mask other reasons for a day off is one of the oldest and most poorly thought out excuses in the book. Even Stephen Ireland has got caught out.

    Employer smelled a rat?


  • Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators Posts: 10,613 Mod ✭✭✭✭Jim2007


    Using dead relatives to mask other reasons for a day off is one of the oldest and most poorly thought out excuses in the book. Even Stephen Ireland has got caught out.

    I did have a colleague once who's granny died 3 times :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,578 ✭✭✭monkeysnapper


    Using dead relatives to mask other reasons for a day off is one of the oldest and most poorly thought out excuses in the book. Even Stephen Ireland has got caught out.

    Employer smelled a rat?

    Stephen Ireland is a prat , that's no example to use in this thread :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 119 ✭✭Sikie


    Although this sounds a rather harsh rebuke for seeking time off for a funeral. Even if there was a policy about compassionate leave it doesn't seem in your case it would apply. So unfortunately this is just another reason not to be at work in the eyes of your manager, compounded by the short notice. The thing you need to ask yourself about this incident in order to understand it, is you time and attendance record. Is this a once off in the midst of a flawless record or have you a history of ringing in sick regularly with a warning for T&A perhaps.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,799 ✭✭✭StillWaters


    Unless it's a close relative, which compassionate leave would cover, most employees go to the evening service or take a half days annual leave, but with adequate notice. Being shouted at is out of order though.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭heavyballs


    Op....I'm guessing you work in the private sector,people I work with would just ring in sick and take the asking out of it.


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