What to say

LegacyUser

Hey people

Long time reader and lurker here, first time poster.

This is more of a curiosity question than an issue but it is something that if I don't address now it could impact on my current relationship, or even future ones.

Here's the jist. Me and my girlfriend, both mid 20's have been together for six months now. I love her to bits and have let my guard down to let her into my life, have always been emotionally protective but after about the fourth month I realised how much I had fallen for her. She loves me too, and is very affectionate towards me, no doubt about that.

Recently though what I have noticed is that although physically we are in tune, and she is constantly showing physical affection along with the " I love yous" and all that, but conversation wise its beginning to lack.
Has anyone ever found this with a partner?

We would get on great some days, never shutting up, but then and more so now, conversation is dwindling, short conversations that go nowhere. We have a huge amount in common, its crazy how much, from our likes in life to the dislikes. TV, movies, sport, general life views they all match up, even our humor is the same. Its just recently I've noticed that the silences are beginning to be a bit longer than normal. Not awkward in any shape or form but its something I noticed today and just looking back the last couple of weeks.

So what do you boardsies talk about with your partners, what do you joke about.
Are you constantly talking with your other half or are there silences.

Just looking for views and perspectives on this. I know not every relationship is the same. Have been through some great and some terrible ones over the years. Yet this is one I want to work and last to the future. She is the girl that if in three or four years time we are still holding hands, where ever in the world we go, I will probably ask to marry me! That is ages away and for the future version of me to think about.

So guys and gals, what do you think?

Faith

I was a bit like you years ago. My OH and I used have very long silences. We could go for a walk and barely speak at all. It bothered me for a while, but eventually I realised that there was nothing wrong with it. The silences were comfortable and never awkward. It took some time but I got used to it. Now I appreciate that we don't always need to be talking. I'm sure outsiders might see us having dinner or a drink and not talking much, and think we have nothing to say, but we know we don't need to talk. It also makes me appreciate great conversations more when we have them.

P. Breathnach

what to say wrote: »

... Its just recently I've noticed that the silences are beginning to be a bit longer than normal. Not awkward in any shape or form ...

There, I think, you have it. The silences are not awkward. So there is nothing to worry about except that you seem to have an expectation that time together be filled with conversation.

Many couples share comfortable silences.

Overheal

Spooned up on the couch watching TV is worth a thousand conversations either way.

Reesy

Hmmm, in my opinion silences can be signs of comfort or boredom. If you really want something to say & you're struggling to find it, maybe that's an issue. Is it perhaps because you're doing fewer interesting / new things together or apart these days, or are you becoming less interested in what each other says? Or is it rather, as the other posters suggest, companionable silence?

And did you ask her?