Birth Cert

tfarrelly256

Although I did some research years ago I never followed up tracing my natural parents. However I now have an urgent need of a medical history and have a couple of questions.
I do know the agency and have written to them.

Is there any way to speed up the process?

Failing that

I am almost certain ( 95 %) I have a copy of my original Birth Cert, does a Capital 'A' handwritten on the right side indicate the child was adopted?

Due to the urgency I am very tempted to contact my Birth Mother directly, does anybody have any advise in doing this discretely

Thanks

rinsjwind

Hi
You obviously need to be very careful, you most likely will have no idea of your birth mams situation, e.g. who in her current family knows/doesn't know about your existence, the circumstances of the pregnancy and your adoption (which will at best have been very difficult for her, if not downright traumatic). You also need to consider what exactly you want out of this, if its just the medical background, then fair enough, but that needs to be made clear to your birth mam from the outset and that needs to be handled with great care.

I know the HSE and other adoption services get a lot of (often well deserved!) stick on here but this is exactly what these people do for a living and not all of them are a**holes :-). If it's a genuinely urgent and serious medical emergency, contact the agency again and explain that to them (an accompanying letter from your doc might help?) or the Barnardos Adoption Service have a lot of experience in this area and are now registered by the aai to provide adoption tracing services.

Oh and yes, a cap A beside the birth entry does usually mean the child was adopted but just be careful there too, did you follow ALL the steps in the trace guides? I don't know how old you are, but remember that until well into the 1980's there were over 1000 adoptions a year and there can be as many as 6 or 7 of them with same birth date. Again, going through the agency takes care of that issue as they should have all the relevant details on file and might even have info about your birth mothers circumstances.

Anyway, best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

Take care.

Rins

nudger

Was in the same position myself, time was important so I rang the agency explaining the situation and told them I needed an answer within a few days.

Told the agency If they didn't do this for me and if BM refused to give family medical history I had an investigator, ex senior garda who for a fee could trace her in days and I would just call her up, bit of a lie but it worked.

Got back in touch following day with what I wanted to know, feck it it's your life your talking about.

The_Conductor

I'm more a fan of the 'softly-softly' approach- though nudger's rather blunt approach may bear fruit.

In situations like this- its impossible to know what your birthmum's situation is, whether she ever confided in anyone of your existence, what her reaction to contact from you might be.

Personally- I think the- obtuse approach better- ensure you have the correct information- and then approach in such a way as to let her know that its you, without appearing too forceful. It does depend on whether you have some time or how urgent your contact with her is.

A small card- Dear Aine (or whatever her name is), you probably remember me. We last me (give your date of birth) in (the city you were born in). I'd love to meetup at some stage. My contact details are (I'd suggest giving a postal address, not an e-mail address or phone number). Best wishes (and sign it with the first name she gave you- which is probably different from the name your adopted parents gave you).

If someone else reads it- its like a card from an old friend- doesn't give anything away- and it respects her privacy. On the other hand- the ball is then in her court and you don't know how she is going to react- or in what time frame.

If any of us at all can help- please ask anything at all,

Shane

tfarrelly256

Thanks for the replies, I think I will try what nudger suggests and if that gets me nowhere I will try what smccarrick suggests.

There is one thing that worries me though, when I checked the birth certs for my year there was one that stuck out a mile, it matched my birthday by a few days, the place was correct and the given name is the same as my now middle name. I double checked every cert in Ireland +/- a year and noticed something strange though, her sister also had a baby a month later, also adopted and gave it the same first name! The place was different though. Am I missing something here or is it just a coincidence?

nudger

Hi tfarrell256

Look my way may not be For everyone and as said a bit blunt but when you have been on morphine with suspected pancreatic cancer you haven't got time to tip toe.

Thankfully misdiagnosed.

My BM had made it clear she did not want contact so that's why I went heavy handed.

Strange things do pop up when you are doing your trace, in my case I got the basic info including of course BM's name.

Found my birth cert quickly as my first 2 names had not been changed and are distinctive enough but BM's name is wrong and Park house have not come back to me.

Best of luck.

The_Conductor

Yes- some of the strange things that you unearth during searches can be mind boggling- also some of the little throwaway statements from social workers can sometimes be the nuggets that unlock even the most complex searches. Its entirely possible that both sisters had babies a month apart, in different locations, and gave both up for adoption. Heart breaking, but true....... Its only really when you do a little research on society and how Ireland and the Irish were even 30 years ago, that you suddenly realise its a universe away from Ireland of today.

If any of us can help in any way- let us know

tfarrelly256

I always thought it was strange giving the baby the same name. Is is possible it is the same baby and something was done to the birth certs? I have a copy of both and the both have 'A' handwritten on them.