Pregnancy Worry

elnino1977

Hello, I had a one night stand over the weekend with a friend and I am very worried she will be pregnant as a result.

The condom broke but I did pull out but you can never be 100% sure. She did take the morning after pill 30 hours after it happened just in case and told me she is not due her period for another 3 weeks. I am going out of my mind with worry to the point where I am making myself sick

Anybody with any help or advice?

Many thanks for taking the time to read and I hope I put the thread in the right forum

Janey_Mac

Looks like you've both taken all the steps you can for now as far as physically doing something goes. You say the woman is a friend: have you and her talked about your worries? I think it would be a good idea to talk to her and let her know that you're freaking out about it. You could also have the "So what'll we do if you are pregnant?" discussion.

If she doesn't want to think or talk about that yet, then you can still think it out yourself. There's no point telling yourself it'll all be grand. It probably will be, but you might end up a father. Instead of panicking at the vague notion of PARENTHOOD and A BABY, think about the practicalities. You're not just panicking, you're mentally preparing yourself and doing a little basic planning for a possible situation. So, some things you might want to think about in practical terms:

Going to the UK for a termination. Think about how costs would be handled, who'd go, support for the woman (and you) afterwards.

Having the baby. What kind of expenses go with having a child and how would you both meet them? Would you guys want to try out a relationship? If not, or if you did and it didn't work out, what kind of maintenance and custody arrangements would likely suit you both?

elnino1977

Thank you Janeymac for your time and your reply.

Yeah she definitely knows how worried I am about it but I don't really want to keep wrecking her head at the same time. No there would never by no relationship either way , we have been friends a very long time though but that's as far as that would go.

No there has been no discussion about the "what if" scenario and to be honest the thought of it has me in some state. I definitely am not taking the "All will be grand" stance in fact I am the other extreme, so worried that I can barely eat or sleep.

Morag

All you can do is wait it out until she can take a pregnancy test.
If you want to talk to a medical professional about when that may be then ring the
national pregnancy help line. 1850 49 50 51

elnino1977

Thanks Sharrow for your reply and the phone number

Piper101

If she's not due her period for another three weeks it's is extremely unlikely she's pregnant...that coupled with the fact she took the morning after pill and her not being worried! Please don't worry until you have something to worry about and if you do deal with it in a mature sensible way. Whats that expression about worry being interest paid on a debt not yet taken (paraphrasing!)

elnino1977

Hello Piper101, many thanks for your time and your words of encouragement. I was talking to the friend in question and she told me that she had just finished her period and as I have already mentioned she took the morning after pill and she seems to think it will be ok.

Your phrase about worry and stress is very apt and although you are correct in what you say about it , it is still very hard to heed and I am still very worried about it!!! Hopefully though it will be all ok because as I said the stress is awful

Many thanks again

elnino1977

Hello I just thought I would reply and let you know that I got a phone call this morning to say all is good and that there will be no surprises!! I am a very relieved man because I was so stressed and worried. Many thanks to Piper101, Sharrow & Janeymac for their words of advice and encouragement , it meant a lot