Sending condolence message by text

shadowcomplex

What do people here think of sending a condolence text, im not best friends with the person just know them through work

abba twar screams

shadowcomplex wrote: »

What do people here think of sending a condolence text, im not best friends with the person just know them through work

IMO it's probably a generation thing. If the person is under 25 it's probably acceptable to them - but for older people it could seem a bit insensitive

movingsucks

I've done this before and it was a close friend. Knowing her family I knew she'd be bombarded with calls and text is our normal method of communication when we don't live near each other.

If you're not sure, could you send a card instead/as well?

When my Grandmother died a few years back I received loads of texts and I wasn't offended or bemused by it because that's how we communicate and to be honest if they'd rang I probably would've just cried down the phone - some people need that, I didn't

coffee_cake

done it before - it's a way of not bombarding them when they aren't able to talk much or handle a bunch of calls

Stheno

A lot of my work colleagues did this last year when I had a family bereavement, I found it very comforting and non intrusive and it helped me going back to work.


I'm 39 btw, and knowing they knew and were kind enough to send messages was a real comfort.

fataltragedy

I think it is fine.

I certainly found it very comforting to revience condolences messages by text - as did my parents, and rest of family when it happened to us.

It's certainly a better option than doing nothing at all

padd b1975

I think a card would be better if they are not a close friend.

Merkin

I also think it's a nice way of letting someone know you're thinking of them. Accepting calls in the wake of a bereavement can be tough but receiving a text message can be very comforting.

Ellsbells

Merkin wrote: »

I also think it's a nice way of letting someone know you're thinking of them. Accepting calls in the wake of a bereavement can be tough but receiving a text message can be very comforting.

I agree, a call from someone you dont know that well can be too much.

Lollipops23

i got texts off various friends the day my granny died- i work with my best mate so she sent out a message to a few of our close friends to let them know.

Have to say, I found them really lovely- I had to read back over them a few days later, as I was in no state to be taking much in on the day itself. But thought it was really nice all the same.

Fleetwoodmac

i think a text is impersonal i can remember every person who sent a card or wrote a note and i find great comfort in knowing that people took the time to choose a card. send a card they will always have it as a reminder of your condolences, a text doesnt have the same impact

Munstermissy

Fleetwoodmac wrote: »

i think a text is impersonal i can remember every person who sent a card or wrote a note and i find great comfort in knowing that people took the time to choose a card. send a card they will always have it as a reminder of your condolences, a text doesnt have the same impact

Wouldn't necessarily agree with you there. My dad passed away late last year and I received alot of texts from friends. I also received texts from my customers which I thought was very nice considering that they would not have know my father personally but wanted to pass on their condolences to me. I'm in the 40 + club so it's not s generation thing.

Each to their own I say but that is my own peronsal opinion.

NUTLEY BOY

Attitude to text probably depends on age of recipient and how close you are. I prefer to send a handwritten note as it is more personal. Text could appear glib or superficial.

Lanza158

When you are grieving sometimes taking calls can be too much. A text shows you are thinking of the person and gives them the choice of how they respond. I think a text is fine.

Miaireland

I would probably send the text and then follow it up with a hand written note or card.

planetX

I feel differently - to me a text says 'I don't want to talk to you', and would make me feel more sad and alone. Depends on the person I guess, and how many people they have around them.

nucker

People do it on forums and social media, ok, maybe half of them (or less as the case maybe) don't know the person, but the ones that do still post AFAIK

Whatsernamex33

I think it's perfectly fine. When my dad passed away a year ago, I had people texting me their condolences, I texted people to let them know what had happened. I think with closer friends ad family, I would rather see them in person or through a phonecall.
If it were someone I barely or vaguely knew though, I probably wouldn't have the same understanding..