Confused about ex boyfriend

littleapple34

Hi all, I'm new to posting on the boards so here's hoping you can give me some advice. The problem concerns an ex boyfriend. We dated for about four months about two years ago but I ended the relationship as felt I needed more commitment from him than he was able to give at that time. We were and still are physically attracted to each other and got on well but the problem was he was only after breaking up from a girl who is the mother of his child who is now six. She ended it with him and I felt the timing was all wrong and he wasn't ready to make a commitment to me at that time. He has access to the child when he wants. We kissed on and off over the two years and kept in contact via facebook. A few months ago we slept together and he promised he would make contact. He did, but only through facebook and never suggested meeting up. A few weeks ago I met him in a bar. He was all over me and basically told me not to buy a house, he knows im in the market for one! He was building a house, told me to relax it was all going to happen yet. we did not kiss this night. I told him that I saw the child and himself at a local event but didn't go over to see 'hi'. He told me, I should have because it was a great opportunity to meet her. However he still has not made contact or either real effort to meet since. I deleted him off facebook and shall try to move on. Do you think that Im right and he is merely keeping me sweet and waiting in the background to get over his issues? I'm not prepared to wait forever so I'm making a stand. Has anyone got any insight into this situation because my head is wrecked!

Ellsbells

I think he is just keeping you on the hook but obviously is not willing to do the right thing by you. Move on and meet someone who will put their money where their mouth is.

littleapple34

Thanks Ellsbells for the insight. Deep down, it' s what I think too but I could do with out all the headwrecking! Anyone else any thoughts?

Herrick

A guys perspective on this.

He has had more than enough time to actually ask you out properly. I mean this all started two years ago. You meet, kiss, sleep together, etc. But after each time he never bothers to get in contact properly or arrange to spend proper time with you.

He's not waiting to get over "issues" he's simply just not that into you. He's not interested in committing to you. He simply enjoys knowing he can have you.

WhyGoBald

You're doing the right thing. And I wonder why he said you should introduce yourself to his child too, you're not in a relationship with him? I think he's messing with you, OP, you're well shot of him.

littleapple34

Thanks all. There is a little more to the story too. He told me the the mother of his child would start being annoying over access to the child if she realises he has moved on. She doesn't want him but doesn't want anyone else to have him either. At the end of the day, I was the one who broke it off originally, he is the one delivering empty promises but I refuse to be a puppet on a string. It's all just hints about a future relationship with no basis in fact. Thanks for the insights guys, it's good to get impartial advice.