shy guy needs pointers

likeaboson

So I have only ever been in a proper relationship with one girl, my college girlfriend who I seemed to just hit it off (this was about 5 years ago) and she ended it last year.
I went through the usual post breakup thing and now I am happier than I have been in ages My good friend from college had a party recently and I met this amazing girl and I got her number but I dunno where to go from here! how should I strike up a conversation with her to the point where I could ask her out for a drink or coffee? any advice would be welcome

Ickle Magoo

If you got her number - and I presume it was from her - why not just text/call and ask her out?

blatantrereg

If she gave you her number then you're already at the point where you can ask her out for a drink or coffee.

Roselm

likeaboson wrote: »

So I have only ever been in a proper relationship with one girl, my college girlfriend who I seemed to just hit it off (this was about 5 years ago) and she ended it last year.
I went through the usual post breakup thing and now I am happier than I have been in ages My good friend from college had a party recently and I met this amazing girl and I got her number but I dunno where to go from here! how should I strike up a conversation with her to the point where I could ask her out for a drink or coffee? any advice would be welcome

If she gave you her number I would say she already wants you to ask her out for a drink! You probably need to do very little work!
Just send her a text and say hi and ask her what she's been up to. After a bit of chat ask her if she'd like to continue the conversation over coffee. I don't think you need to steer the conversation in any kind of direction/work up to asking her out....?!
Don't leave it too long before you text her though!
Good luck.

likeaboson

I sent her a txt and then after about 2/3 messages she said she said she had to go and I dunno if it was brush off or not by the tone of the message

decmanning

Keep partying and getting numbers my freind enjoy the single life, play the field, dont be afraid to approach a woman on a night out and strike up a conversation, even ask for her number, i was very shy years ago, i think this may have been down to my fear of rejection but when i realsied every man gets rejected at some point, i grew a pair of balls and chanced my arm a lot more, not gonna lie, i got the rejections but i couldnt care because i got just as many women

gonebeyondajoke

if you got her number, you must have done something right! don't be to disheartened by her saying she had to go maybe she genuinely was busy or maybe she was in work! don't give up that easy!!

Herrick

likeaboson wrote: »

I sent her a txt and then after about 2/3 messages she said she said she had to go and I dunno if it was brush off or not by the tone of the message

When did you text, early in the day? She was prob busy. Leave it a couple of days and text her in the evening, more chance of her having time to chat

likeaboson

Herrick wrote: »

When did you text, early in the day? She was prob busy. Leave it a couple of days and text her in the evening, more chance of her having time to chat

It was actually later on in the evening i text her

blatantrereg

Maybe she decided you were just going to start text message conversations with her instead of asking her out.
Dont be afraid of being forward (without being pushy). Girls will get bored and frustrated if they think you aren't ever going to make a move. Timidity is not generally attractive to them either. You already have a green light. Just go ahead and ask her out. No need to beat around the bush.

LegacyUser

Hi op. I would be in the category to just leave it be and move on. Its happened numerous times where I meet someone at parties and you notice when they are texting back that they dont seem interest as it could have just been the drink talking for them at the party if you get me?

Do you see her locally much?? If not, I would leave it be to be honest and move on.

dnme

OP

Stop analysing and just do it. If she says no, then you will know for sure. Either way, do not feel embarrassed or cheeky. You are complimenting her by asking her out so make no apologies for that. Having said that, do so respectfully and humbly. Just send her a text along the lines of...

Hi {firstname}. Was wondering if you'd like to get together for a coffee sometime over the coming days? I enjoy talking to you and would love to do so without having to text {Yourname}

always use her first name, and avoid txt spk. Use full words and don't try to sound too cool

Do it, just do it! The consequences are either a yes or a no and a complimented girl. Thats it! Nothing else. If she says no, just move on. Best of luck

Piliger

OP listen to me.

STOP thinking and just DO.

No more cerebral analytics.

No more intellectual gymnastics.

Call the girl and say "hey ... fancy meeting up for a coffee this week?" or whatever the customary lingo is these days.

What's the worst that can happen OP ? hmmm ? she says no ? ok .. feel sh1te for a day or so .... and then move on to the next one. She will come along I promise you (the next one)