is anyone in a truly monogomous relationship

LegacyUser

The idea of just being with one person for life just seems mad. I know people who are married but still have flings in fact i dont know any couple you are just loyal to each other. its either an open relationship or there having trysts on the side. So, how many of you here are in a truly monogomous relationship, and for how long. do you ever miss the excitement of illicit encounters?

1ZRed

stonewall1969 wrote: »

The idea of just being with one person for life just seems mad. I know people who are married but still have flings in fact i dont know any couple you are just loyal to each other. its either an open relationship or there having trysts on the side. So, how many of you here are in a truly monogomous relationship, and for how long. do you ever miss the excitement of illicit encounters?

What do you mean? Not everyone is unfaithful in their relationships.

Being in an open relationship doesn't necessarily mean that the wall falls off the house and you're allowed to sleep around as much and as often as you'd like. You can leave the door open and regulate it. Like you play together or it's not a frequent thing, whatever it is, as long as both people are content on the arrangement.

You say the last part like you are going behind their back inorder to sleep with other people but you wouldn't be if you were honest to your partner and in an open relationship. I've nothing against open relationships, it wouldn't be for me, but I think honestly would be needed to make it work. I know a guy who is in this sort of relationship and they play together and have their own rules so it's not a free for all in their situation and it works.
And if it was honest, it wouldn't be an "illicit encounter". That implies being deceptive on your part.

But anyway man, if you want your open relationship you need to be open to your partner as well. Just because everyone else might be sleeping around doesn't mean you can do it too and not call it cheating. If you set up an agreement with the person you're with and they agree, then it's ok.

Shakti

I'm in a monogagamoose relationship with myself

baby and crumble

My gf and I have been monogamous since we got together. That's nearly 9 years. I don't know anyone who has cheated on teir partner.

whattotdo

stonewall1969 wrote: »

The idea of just being with one person for life just seems mad. I know people who are married but still have flings in fact i dont know any couple you are just loyal to each other. its either an open relationship or there having trysts on the side. So, how many of you here are in a truly monogomous relationship, and for how long. do you ever miss the excitement of illicit encounters?

The idea of being with the one person for life,for me,isn't mad.I 'thought' I was in a monogomous relationship for five years but later found that he had cheated on me once,once that I know of.Broke my heart and shook my confidence in relationships but at least I found out and I didn't find out ten years later.It shook my confidence because he was the type of person I thought that wouldn't cheat,c'est la vie!

stephen_n

Personally I don't believe monogomy is a natural state of existence, it's a social norm. I however have never and would never stray in a relationship. I know of plenty of couples who have monogamous relationships and plenty that don't! But in answer to your original question OP yes there are lots of truely monogamous relationships!

Coeurdepirate

I would hate to be in a relationship that wasn't monogamous.

Hunchback

YUP, in a 10 and a half year monogamous relationship

ixoy

In a monogamous relationship begun seven years ago today. Having what we do, I couldn't possibly comprehend how it could be traded for "illicit encounters". I've enough excitement when my heart still patters thinking of him. No need to look elsewhere when it's right beside me.

FairytaleGirl

In a monogomous relationship 18 months, was in a 4year monogomous relationship before that.

All this 'humans are not ment to be monogomous' stuff is a pile of shoite in my opinion. If you cant commit dont BE in a relationship.

Dont get into one, destroy it and break someones heart all for a quick ride, then use the 'I cant be faithful' excuse.

ADULT MATURE Relationships take work, and trust and commitment, and to be honest, when you meet the right person -you wont want to cheat.

All these 'non commital' people need to grow up and close their legs.

Tipperary animal lover

Yeah 20years this year, age gap of 8years and all going great, we have the same interests friends and our own friends, I can trust him going out a night with he's friends and vice versa...... It seems to work for us! Each to there own .... Right!

Mace Windu

I was in a monogamous relationship for almost nine years. We agreed at some point that if anyone of us wanted to discuss other options, we'd do so. But in the end neither of us had ever needed any other option.

floggg

FairytaleGirl wrote: »

All these 'non commital' people need to grow up and close their legs.

That's a bit immature and judgmental.

Your relationship works for you. It doesn't mean it would for others.

Monogamous relationships work for many. They fail for many. The same with open relationships. Some people might be better off staying out of relationships altogether.

In the same way it's not right for somebody to say your relationship is a farce for being monogamous, you shouldn't throw down judgments on others because they choose not to be monogamous.

Note: I'm talking about open relationship types with honesty, communication and transparency. Not a relationship where on thinks it's monogamous and the other sleeps around behind their back.

Rick_

I hope people out there are having monogamous relationships and are seeking them for a long term purpose. I don't want to be the only monogamous queer out there endlessly searching for the love of my life only to find he'd rather be shagging someone else as well...!

floggg

Paddy C wrote: »

I hope people out there are having monogamous relationships and are seeking them for a long term purpose. I don't want to be the only monogamous queer out there endlessly searching for the love of my life only to find he'd rather be shagging someone else as well...!

I am very sure he would prefer to be shagging someone else as well.

A monogamous relationship doesn't mean you don't want to shag other people. It means that you both agree not to shag other people, even if you wouldn't mind doing so every now and again.

It's the admission price to a monogamous relationship. If monogamy was easy, there'd be no need for divorce.

Hopefully though he'll think it's a small price to pay.