Sad & Lonely

Lonely Girl

For the past while I've been feeling low. I'm in my early 30's and kind of wish my life was different. I feel sad & lonely quite a lot & get quite upset sometimes. I don't particularly like where I work & would love a change but that's next to impossible in the current jobs market. Most of my friends have settled down recently & are starting families and while I am happy for them I wish it was me. I'm single & I feel there is no prospect for me of ever meeting that someone special. It does get me down because there is nothing I wish for more than to be in a committed relationship with a guy. I have so much love to give. I've reached a stage in my life where holidays don't interest me like they used to ... I've done the backpacking trip to Australia, travelled around Europe etc ... it's not where I'm at anymore. I've joined sports clubs & groups & I do put myself out there not just to meet a guy but to meet new people in general. I wish I didn't feel so lost. I have tried talk to one of my married friends about it but it's hard sometimes because I don't want her to think I'm jealous of what she has.

CommanderC

I know it might seem hard at the moment, but try to focus on the good things you have in life rather than the things you feel are missing in your life.

Maybe, break down the areas in your life into sections- career, love life, hobbies/interests and make plans for things to do in each area. Perhaps you could do some training/study to forge a more interesting career path for yourself. You could join some single groups (I've seen some on meetup.com) in order to meet up with other single people of a similar age, who have the same relationship objectives as you.

Life may seem to be overwhelming at the moment, but you never know who or what is around the corner. Things won't always be so difficult.

Gooner111

Hi OP.

It sounds like you've led a very good good life and are very active - wish I had done all that stuff myself! Being lonely is not a nice feeling and one I know. I definitely feel for you.

But you definitely have good things going for you. Your active, interesting and have a group of friends. Are you particulary close to any of them...if so don't be afraid to ask for help. Maybe they have a few single friends they could set you up with?? Another option would be to try some dating sites. You sound like you have a lot to talk about and give.

Sarah**

I can only echo what the Gooner and CommanderC have said. You have a circle of friends and are active.

Try be positive. You will meet someone when you stop looking for it. Your time to shine and be happy will come because you deserve it.

You need to focus on you and your friends and family for now. When the time is right, you will meet the right person.

snafuk35

Lonely Girl wrote: »

For the past while I've been feeling low. I'm in my early 30's and kind of wish my life was different. I feel sad & lonely quite a lot & get quite upset sometimes. I don't particularly like where I work & would love a change but that's next to impossible in the current jobs market. Most of my friends have settled down recently & are starting families and while I am happy for them I wish it was me. I'm single & I feel there is no prospect for me of ever meeting that someone special. It does get me down because there is nothing I wish for more than to be in a committed relationship with a guy. I have so much love to give. I've reached a stage in my life where holidays don't interest me like they used to ... I've done the backpacking trip to Australia, travelled around Europe etc ... it's not where I'm at anymore. I've joined sports clubs & groups & I do put myself out there not just to meet a guy but to meet new people in general. I wish I didn't feel so lost. I have tried talk to one of my married friends about it but it's hard sometimes because I don't want her to think I'm jealous of what she has.

You are very vague about what kind of person you are and your experiences with men.

Are you approachable? Do you brush men off when they hit on you? Do you flirt with men? Do you feel you are sexy? Are you comfortable being forward and sexual? Do you notice if men are checking you out? Do you check men out but don't take any initiative? Do you ever dress in sexy clothes and go clubbing? What are your sexual morals? Do you have any sexual hang ups? Were you let down by a past boyfriend? Have you had one night stands or flings or are you a virgin or somewhere in between? Do you like sex or are you scared of sex? Are you self-conscious about being overweight or being too skinny or something else? Have you had many relationships or none? Do you live independently or at home with your parents?

There could be any number of reasons of things holding you back.

s08t

Hi Lonelygirl. We all wish our lives could be that bit different than it is but sometimes we just have to accept what we are giving, be thankful of it and most importantly enjoy everything in your life. Ask yourself these questions? What do I want in my life? What do I want my life to be like? Happiness, someone to fall in love with, have children eventually. These are all things u can acheive...but with a bit positive thinking. It just seems to me by reading ur thread u are thinking negative. Why not instead put all ur energy into thinking positive and every night in bed close ur eyes and visualise your future life and what u want it to be like. Sometimes visualising and knowing exactly what u want, u can get it more easily.