Shattered

LegacyUser

Hi Guys,

My boyfriend just broke up with and has said that he wants no contact. He said
if I email him he won't reply so not to bother. He told me he's not doing this to be cruel, it's just the only way we'll both be able to move on.

I am SHATTERED. I can't concentrate on anything, my heart is racing, i feel anxious, empty, paniced, scared etc

We are both 31.

Can somebody please help me??? I keep staring at my emails praying he'll email. Oh my God, this is horrific:(

LegacyUser

Hi OP,
I know exactly the way you feel, my bf of 4 years broke up with me over a month ago. I think your ex did the right thing by saying he wants absolutely no contact, from the advice I have got it seems to be the only way to move on. Delete him on facebook and everything, I had to because I was driven mad seeing his name everywhere and seeing what he was doing.
The reason I say your ex did the right thing is because my ex was saying he didnt feel the same about me anymore, but saying he needed time and that he wanted to try again. So I was left hoping and praying he wanted me back, but then had to find out from facebook(changed his relationship status to single). He just didnt want to have to deal with me.
I know how sickening it is, but as everyone keeps telling me, it will get better. I can't see it myself, but we just have to get through it.
Just know that there are other people out there going through the same thing.
Look after yourself
x

Ellsbells

All over to a friend / family as you should not be on your own right now.

ljpg

a few years ago my girlfriend and i broke up after 6 years together,i can totally relate to your symptoms,i couldn't eat or sleep properly for weeks,i cant blame your boyfriend for wanting to break all contact,he,s probably going through the same pain as you and is trying to move on,all i can say is time is a great healer,i don't think there's any easy way around it,it'll just take time to come to terms with the situation,as the previous post suggested,spend lots of time with family and friends and as little time on your own as possible.

a fat guy

Whenever something is bothering you that much, I find that the best cure is to work.

It'll at least keep your mind off of things.

SineadMarie

Feel really bad for you i know how hard it is and the feelings you have are perfectly normal, i'm still feeling that way about my recent break up well was end of June and what i did wrong was not cut contact straight away we went around in circles for over a month and i feel even worse now. My point is its the best thing right now not hearing from him it will give you time to heal and help you move on.

Were you together long? You can get through this, some days i can't even get out of bed and just wanna throw up but it will get easier i'm hopeful of that. Keep busy most important thing, delete his number / fb etc. If its meant to be you'll end up sorting things out in time if not plenty of fish in the sea. Although i hate that saying when your going through a break up. Take care of yourself.

LegacyUser

Your boyfriend ended this relationship and you are both 31.
He may have though that if we stay together she will expect me to move in, propose, get married and have children. He decided that he did not want this and rather that keeping you dangling on he ended your relationship.
He could have stayed with you for another few months or years because it is the easy thing to do. I watched one girl I know who was with her oh for 10 years ask him when are we going to get married? He said I have no interest in this & at this stage she was older than you.
She broke up with him but they got back together a few months later, lived together, brought a home together and there relationship broke up again. They managed to sell the house during the boom. Today this girl is in her mid 40's without the husband or family that she wanted due to staying with a man who did not want the same as her.
I would except that this relationship has ended and start to go out with your friends or get involved with a few new groups. One of my friend's did this after her relationship ended and within 15 months she met someone who she later married.
She told me I was so upset when things ended with //// but I am so much happier with /// as I don't think myself and//// would have lasted.
Things can and do get better but you have to be willing to move on for this to happen.