male vs female cat

Jono!

hi
me and my girlfriend are considering getting a cat. we were out looking at our local cat shelter today just to get a feel and have a look around and of course talk to the guys out there about which cat would be best suited.

we have pretty much narrowed it down to two cats one a male and the other a female, we are going out next week with our dog to see how he gets on with them and to make sure everyone will be happy living together.

now I'm just wondering if there is a preference over having a male or female cat, is one or affectionate then the other? ect. both of course will be neutered/spayed. I've read some things on the internet that say females are more independent and males more affectionate. so just wondering whats your experience? is there really any difference?
thanks

samsx

hey there, we have a male and female cat (brother and sister) and both spayed. We also have three dogs, they NEVER meet, its close to WW3...
I never minded cats until we got our own, the female is pure useless, sleeps, eats and cries constantly.
The male is a fantastic hunter (rats/mice etc.) which was great until we found him on the kitchen floor with a half dead rat one winter evening.
Cats will hop in windows constantly and their 'toilet' is extremely potent and dangerous for children/pregnant women.
I would never get a cat again, go get another loving dog (or even 2 more dogs) cats are loveless balls of fur.

Chuck Stone

samsx wrote: »

.cats are loveless balls of fur.

Bullshit. I'm just back from feeding my brother's cat and he was all over me cos he was lonely the poor thing and they're only gone a day. A very affectionate wee thing he is.

Anyhoo, why don't you ask the staff which one is more sociable OP?

Jono!

Chuck Stone wrote: »

Anyhoo, why don't you ask the staff which one is more sociable OP?

well it was between us and the staff that we pretty much came up with the choice of the two, she said both would be perfect for our situation they are both older one 6months and the other 8months so would be more able for the dog. so was just wondering if there was actually a difference between the male and females or do we just have to do eenie, meenie, minie, mo?:D

Themadhouse

It really depends on the cat tbh. We have 9 here, 5 boys and 4 girls.
one of the girls is the most lovable cat you will ever meet, her daughter likes to be left to her own devises, the other 2 are very afectionate and will cuddle up on your knee regularly.
The boys, 1 is very very shy ( rescued at 1 1/2 and was very sick), another will look for back scratches but wont cuddle, 2 are sweet boys who are extremely friendly and one likes to sit on top of you at any opportunity and demands to be carried around like a baby.

Some will be affectionate and some wont regardless of male or female.

Dont mind the toilet = dangerous to kids/pregnant woman its bull.

Magenta

I personally prefer females. I find that females are real homebirds, whereas a male, even if neutered, will tend to be more likely to wander off.
However, both are equally affectionate, and if you keep your cat solely indoors, once the male is neutered there is no difference.

maggiepip

If you want to generalise I think male cats are more affectionate, I know, of course, it depends on the cat - but in general I think you are more likely to get an affectionate male.

I have 3 males and one female and the female is standoffish in comparison. 3 friends of mine have both male and female cats and they say the same. But they are all:) lovely

Mo60

I don't think it makes any difference whether a cat is male or female its all down to it's individual personality.

I have 3 female cats - one would lick you to death, another will only let you pet when it suits her and the last is completely indifferent. I have had male cats in the past and have found each have had their own different personalities.

I'ts all part of cat ownership and makes it all the more enjoyable.

Pumpkinseeds

I think that all cats have their own unique personalities and quirks. I've had a few female cats but mostly males, all of our cats were strays. I think you should think about which of the cats you felt most drawn to. Well done for going to a rescue.

SillyMangoX

My female wanders, hunts, is quite confidant and used to be quite independent but within the last year she sticks to my lap like glue, and grooms me like mad if I scratch her itchy spots. She is also obsessed with licking eyebrows...

My male is an annoyingly loveable clingy whiny sweetheart who i wouldn't change for the world. He adores me, but is absolutely terrified of strangers. And his own reflection. And spoons.

I also had both a male and female in the past who were fiercely independent, you'd get an hour a day with them to play and cuddle other than that they were going about their own business and only came when they wanted food.

It's completely down to the personality of the cat, and also in part, to the way they are raised from kitten hood. We used to cradle Cream like a baby when he was a kit, and he still insists on it now.. And we used to sponge him off as he was too little to give himself a good clean, and now he returns the favour by grooming us at every available opportunity...

Just to throw it out there, why not get both? 2 cats are great company for each other :P

The Sweeper

SillyMangoX wrote: »

Just to throw it out there, why not get both? 2 cats are great company for each other :P

Best suggestion on thread.

ABajaninCork

I've had three cats. Two toms and a queen.

Although I loved my girl to pieces, she was so hard to toilet train. I had nightmares with her. The toms? Absolutely no trouble at all. All I had to do was place them in the litter tray, gently rub their paws in it and off they went!

Would love to get another cat (But can't as I live in rented accommodation ATM). When I do, I've decided to get another British SH and definitely it will be a tom. No more queens for me!

Themadhouse

ABajaninCork wrote: »

I've had three cats. Two toms and a queen.

Although I loved my girl to pieces, she was so hard to toilet train. I had nightmares with her. The toms? Absolutely no trouble at all. All I had to do was place them in the litter tray, gently rub their paws in it and off they went!

Would love to get another cat (But can't as I live in rented accommodation ATM). When I do, I've decided to get another British SH and definitely it will be a tom. No more queens for me!

Did you get your girl very young? Its so unusual to have toilet issues with a cat unless they are very young.

Also what colour BSH have you got? I have a few here, 2 girls and a boy.

ABajaninCork

Themadhouse wrote: »

Did you get your girl very young? Its so unusual to have toilet issues with a cat unless they are very young.

Also what colour BSH have you got? I have a few here, 2 girls and a boy.

Sadly, all are waiting for me at Rainbow Bridge My girl I got from the vet. You could say she was a rescue. Seems she was going to be drowned unless a home was found...Vet told me she was 8 weeks. I think she was six or younger as she was so small, and had real trouble keeping food down (weaned far too early). My BSH was actually a Persian/BSH X but he looked exactly like a BSH. He was all black and a real character. Handsome devil too!

samsx

Themadhouse wrote: »

Dont mind the toilet = dangerous to kids/pregnant woman its bull.

............bull you say, check the proven facts, my advise ( which i believe is what this thread is for?? without childish reaction) get another Dog for unconditional love.

Cats love you when you are hungry and that's about it, GET ANOTHER DOG!!!!;)

SillyMangoX

The op didnt ask if they should get a dog or cat, they are getting a cat and want advise on gender. And cats dont just love when they are hungry. They might do if you only feed them once a day, but in my experience cats are just as loving when they are full.

samsx

My God, cat people very defensive, still my advice is, regardless of male or female feline, get a dog!

rhona39

Jono! wrote: »

hi
me and my girlfriend are considering getting a cat. we were out looking at our local cat shelter today just to get a feel and have a look around and of course talk to the guys out there about which cat would be best suited.

we have pretty much narrowed it down to two cats one a male and the other a female, we are going out next week with our dog to see how he gets on with them and to make sure everyone will be happy living together.

now I'm just wondering if there is a preference over having a male or female cat, is one or affectionate then the other? ect. both of course will be neutered/spayed. I've read some things on the internet that say females are more independent and males more affectionate. so just wondering whats your experience? is there really any difference?
thanks

You should take both cats and neuter,when they are old enough.having two,they are less likely to roam and will keep other company.cats are independant and unlike a dog(who dont cope well,when on their own) cats can.so ideal if you both work.

SillyMangoX

samsx wrote: »

My God, cat people very defensive, still my advice is, regardless of male or female feline, get a dog!

I reiterate, the op is looking for a cat. So your advise to get a dog isnt really helpful.

I know I said it earlier but if at all possible I would go for the 2 of them. They are still young enough that they would grow up together andmaintain a friendship, and if you are ever out of the house for a long period such as for work, they are brilliant at keeping each other amused. My 2 (a male/female combo) happily spend their time grooming each other or hitting toys around the place, stalking each other, play fighting. They would be truely lost without each other!

PucaMama

http://www.housekeepingchannel.com/a_575-Pregnant_Women_Beware_the_Litter_Box___and_the_Garden

Themadhouse wrote: »

Dont mind the toilet = dangerous to kids/pregnant woman its bull.

dont be so irresponsible :mad:

Themadhouse

PucaMama wrote: »

http://www.housekeepingchannel.com/a_575-Pregnant_Women_Beware_the_Litter_Box___and_the_Garden

dont be so irresponsible :mad:

eh, if you have good hygene habits it is not a problem. My cats do not roam and i clean the trays daily while using a scoop and i even wash my hands afterwards!

Teach your kids not to handle it and if you are pregnant use common sense!

Its all scaremongering!

PucaMama

Themadhouse wrote: »

eh, if you have good hygene habits it is not a problem. My cats do not roam and i clean the trays daily while using a scoop and i even wash my hands afterwards!

Teach your kids not to handle it and if you are pregnant use common sense!

Its all scaremongering!

it is not!!!!

its a very real disease. :mad:

Chuck Stone

samsx wrote: »

Cats love you when you are hungry and that's about it

Total nonsense.

My Brother's cat jumped up on my lap after he was fed. He just wanted to be comforted the wee softy because he felt lonely.

My Mother's cat insists on getting on her knee every morning for a pet. I fell asleep in the Ma's house and woke up with her cat on my back purring away because she gets lonely at night.

Cats are much more sophisticated than you give them credit for.

Themadhouse

PucaMama wrote: »

it is not!!!!

its a very real disease. :mad:

Yes it is a very real disease. One that you can pick up in your own kitchen not just by handling cat poo. If you are pregnent you can wear gloves while scooping the trays, the same as you would wear gloves if handling raw meat. Its not rocket science. I have yet to hear people saying you can get toxo from your own kitchen while pregnant or from eating fruit that is contaminated.

As i said good hygene habits go a long way!

I have yet to hear of anyone catch toxo from cats litter and I have worked in cat rescue for years, a huge amount of people i know also have cats and a lot of them have kids or have been pregnant at the same time as having cats.

All I am saying is use common sense, worm your cat regularly and dont handle or ingest the cat poo and wash your hands when you do empty the litter tray, wear gloves if you want, wear gloves while garden incase there is buried cat poo and again wash your hands.

"In order for humans to catch the disease, they must make physical contact with something infected by the parasite and then transfer it to their mouth. Most of us touch our mouths with unwashed hands time and time again during the day without even realizing it. Here are some common ways that humans get infected with toxo:

Changing the litter box of an infected cat, then accidentally touching unwashed hands to the mouth.
Eating unwashed fruits or vegetables grown in contaminated soil or drinking contaminated water. Gardening without gloves, then inadvertently touching unwashed hands to the mouth can transfer soil contaminated by cat feces.
Eating raw or undercooked meat from infected animals or touching unwashed hands to the mouth after handling uncooked meat. Utensils such as knives, cutting boards and other items can become contaminated by contact with raw meats or their juices. Toxo can live in the flesh of animals that have eaten something contaminated by cat feces. Pigs, lamb and deer are especially vulnerable." taken from the article you linked to.

Mo60

PucaMama wrote: »

it is not!!!!

its a very real disease. :mad:

A real disease yes, but how many people have actually caught it?

Back to topic - the suggestion by a previous poster to get both kittens is a good one. Double the enjoyment and company for each other.

rhona39

Themadhouse wrote: »

It really depends on the cat tbh. We have 9 here, 5 boys and 4 girls.
one of the girls is the most lovable cat you will ever meet, her daughter likes to be left to her own devises, the other 2 are very afectionate and will cuddle up on your knee regularly.
The boys, 1 is very very shy ( rescued at 1 1/2 and was very sick), another will look for back scratches but wont cuddle, 2 are sweet boys who are extremely friendly and one likes to sit on top of you at any opportunity and demands to be carried around like a baby.

Some will be affectionate and some wont regardless of male or female.

Dont mind the toilet = dangerous to kids/pregnant woman its bull.

I love both my cats &dogs,though dogs do give you more love.cats are very clean but,if using litter tray,clean regularly because cats waste is indeed dangerous to pregnant women and children.

Cherry Blossom

All off-topic posts from this point on will incur infractions, no more discussion on anything other than advice as to whether the OP should get a male or female cat (or both).

Thanks

ameee

I have a tom who is the most friendly thing ever,would live on my lap if I let him he loves nothing better he even curls up in a ball and sucks his tail while purrring he is an oddball he is neutered and loves being in or out,had a female who was very antisocial lived on the landing as she hated to be downstairs were we were and then ran away.We have a new female super friendly and affectionate spends the night curled up at my feet I think it just depends on the cat try judge how friendly they are when you visit

Jono!

thanks everyone for all the info! really don't think we'll be able to take two, i didn't even want one to start with but i have been swayed, I'm not ready for two!:o

i guess it different with every cat as most people have pointed out, we will just have to spend more time with them next time and try and see which is best for us, i think the gf would be heart broken if the cat was antisocial or not very affectionate.
thanks!

The Sweeper

I have six, four males, all desexed pre six months of age, and two females, similarly desexed early.

The boys are all boofheads - without exception they are careful with their claws and love to be cuddled. However they do have very different personalities. One is totally chilled, one will bolt at the slightest provocation. Another will default to hissing when he's startled, the last is an oddbod who squeaks instead of miaows and loves to drink from a running tap.

The girls are definitely different to the boys and very different to each other. One is independent, friendly, gregarious but not too crazy about being stroked or picked up. The other cuddles on the sofa every night, but bites.

Two cats isn't really more work than one cat. If they get along they'll keep each other company and you'll get 45 mins entertainment every evening when they get temporary cat insanity and charge about the house chasing each other. The other good thing is if you go away on holidays, you're more and more likely to be able to get a petsitter for your pets. I feel a lot better leaving my cats to keep each other company when I go away, and a petsitter comes in twice a day, than I would if I was just one cat on its own.

Of course it is more expensive to own more than one cat, but I can tell you that I couldn't cope with six dogs, or even two dogs, but I find my six cats are about the same amount of work as my one dog.

Cats are great if you put time in with them. Mine come when they're called, two of them fetch, three of them do somersaults around the house every evening, four are total lapcats, one drinks out of the tap, one is a clown, two like the dog (the other four tolerate or ignore him). I get huge entertainment out of them. It's ace.

planetX

I have 2 males and 3 females of different ages, and they really don't have any behavioural differences based on gender. All are affectionate, all have their own personalities - for instance the only 2 that don't get along are the oldest female and the youngest male, not what i would have predicted but their personalities just clash.
Neutering young is important though, it makes for a nicer pet, and bear in mind that males are cheaper to neuter than females.

él statutorio

I'm a dog lover, never had cats growing up. Anyway herself decided she was getting a cat a few years ago (we live in an apartment so a dog isn't practical). We now have two female cats (and a baby!) who are polar opposites in terms of personalities, one is quite aloof and the other is a lapcat.. My sister has a Tom and he's very affectionate.

I think it depends on the personality of the animal (this goes for cats and dogs too). Some can be very affectionate while others can be a$$hats, they're a lot like some people I guess.

jmck

I think it really depends on the cat. I find most cats only really show their personality to their owner or once they trust you, so id say its pretty hard to choose at first.

I had a grumpy male cat with tonnes of personality. Wasnt very affectionate but loved company. Only thing that would put me off getting a male again is that we were living in a cul-de-sac where there were other cats. And other males mean competition! so he got in quite a lot of fights with another male...until he became the topcat;)

planetX

jmck wrote: »

Only thing that would put me off getting a male again is that we were living in a cul-de-sac where there were other cats. And other males mean competition! so he got in quite a lot of fights with another male...until he became the topcat;)

my females are attacked by the local tom just as badly as the neutered males. It wouldn't be such a problem if everyone neutered early, or at all...

PrincessLola

samsx wrote: »

cats are loveless balls of fur.

I never trust people who 'love' dogs but consider cats to be evil.

Its in cats' nature to hunt, they're carnivores, even more so than dogs. If you can't deal with this than you don't deserve to own one.
Cats are often nervous because they're very small animals and humans are eight times their size, if you show them love they'll trust you forever.

rhona39

PrincessLola wrote: »

samsx wrote: »

cats are loveless balls of fur.

I never trust people who 'love' dogs but consider cats to be evil.

Its in cats' nature to hunt, they're carnivores, even more so than dogs. If you can't deal with this than you don't deserve to own one.
Cats are often nervous because they're very small animals and humans are eight times their size, if you show them love they'll trust you forever.

I think samsx is just joking around and abviously loves dogs more.i think to say you wouldnt trust someone because they dont like cats is harsh.people have preferences when it comes to alot of things inc animals.i myself love most pets but,spiders! Def not

meoklmrk91

I have two fEmales. The older one is almost 10 is completely aloof, doesn't really like to be touched unless its on her terms, every so often she will come up to you and cuddle right up to you.

Second female is a baby literally, loves people, loves cuddles and rarely leaves the house as she prefers to stay inside with us.

I don't that sex makes much of a difference in their temperament, I think they are all different regardless.

Shenshen

PrincessLola wrote: »

I never trust people who 'love' dogs but consider cats to be evil.

Its in cats' nature to hunt, they're carnivores, even more so than dogs. If you can't deal with this than you don't deserve to own one.
Cats are often nervous because they're very small animals and humans are eight times their size, if you show them love they'll trust you forever.

There's a lot of truth in the saying that people who love dogs like to have servants, whereas people who love cats love to have companions.

I don't judge people by which animal they prefer, but I do distrust people who are exclusive about dogs and hate cats. There's just something there which I don't take to.

jmck

Shenshen wrote: »

There's a lot of truth in the saying that people who love dogs like to have servants, whereas people who love cats love to have companions.

I don't judge people by which animal they prefer, but I do distrust people who are exclusive about dogs and hate cats. There's just something there which I don't take to.

I agree! (sorry if I'm going off topic of the male v female cats) but i get so annoyed when people compare dogs and cats. They're very different animals, cats are more like humans than people think.

If you're sunning yourself on a wall and a stranger comes up to you and starts touching you, what would you do? Or if someone you've never seen in your life comes into your house and plonks down beside you, would you be happy?

I love dogs too, but I dont think people can fully judge a cat unless they've owned one, as that's when you really get to know them.