Go alone to labour or with someone?

LegacyUser

I'm pregnant for the first time and my due date is very soon. I decided early on that I want to go alone to labour but now I suddenly want my best friend to be there by my side. How about you, do you want someone to be there by your side or are you better alone?

Moonbeam

I would not want to go through the final stages of it alone.
I know people say it is a great experience and yes when it is over and you have your baby in your arms it is but it is not exactly pleasant going through it and some people are in labour for hours or days.

Squiggler

I think having someone there to support you during labour is really important. My husband was wonderful last time and I wouldn't like to consider going through it without him.

But it's important to chose carefully, not everyone is able to cope with the situation. My sister ended up banishing her otherwise wonderful husband because he was actually upsetting her. For her second she considered asking our Mum to go with her but then she realised that Mum was too much of a worrier and that wouldn't be good either. On her third she hired a Doula and she has said that if there are any more she'll do the same.

You need someone who is going to be able to stay level headed, because you're not going to be. Someone you can totally rely on, who knows you and knows your preferences and can speak up for you if necessary.

Rose35

Im preferring to go it alone, feel I work better on my own and not having to worry about someone being there for hrs if not days on end, im just independent that way, dont see why the hospitals have to make such a big fuss about having a support partner there.

Will have my sister on standby if I need her towards the end, but hopefully not, and as for baby's father, he is not keen, reckons he will not be any good, and I believe that too because I know what he is like in emotional situations, and thats not good.

Each too their own but if you feel you can go it alone, go for it, you won't be the first and certainly not the last. Good luck with it all.

missis aggie

My husband was with me through the labour and he was the best support. I had my birthing plan and he made sure I stick to it ( drug free birth ). There was few moments of weakness he helped me to go through and I didn't take anything I knew I will regret later... It was amazing to share the moment of our baby being born.

LegacyUser

My husband was there for labour and he was fantastic. I had a really tough time but I'm still glad that I can talk through the experience and the memories - both good and horrific - with someone in my life.

But if he wasn't available? Although I have great friends, I don't think I would want any of them there for labour. Too intimate. Also I'd probably be a bit anxious about them and how they were coping, their time etc., and that's not good. A doula would probably be a very good idea as it's your first labour. Though having said that, we had the same midwife all the way through and she was great. Maybe have a chat with the hospital about it and see if they can assign you someone?

Good luck xx