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New Poem - "The Courtly Lovers"

Comments

  • #2
    Rubecula
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    Personally, I liked it. I am not much on poetry really, but that looked very good to me.


  • #3
    Agent Weebley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 450 ✭✭Agent Weebley


    I really liked your poem, tomasocarthaigh . . . but could you have put the words down in front of us on your posting first, so we could pace it ourselves? Having the ability to metre out the words in the readers own time scale is important.

    Having said that, the video, words, music, your style and your tick accent was extremely cool to hear. You seemed to rush it a little, though . . . and you gave a linear delivery; you kept the same metre throughout. I would stretch it out for all it is worth. Forget the metrognome angle.

    I went to your website and read your poem again at my own pace, my bubble was burst by the Legend . . . the Legend of Poem. I scanned other poems, and the reasoning behind each poem was at the end . . . WTF? No need to explain, man! I would get rid of those . . . pronto. In fact, not explaining anything at the end would force you to expand on any required explanations within the poem itself. The Helen smile made me think of Helen Wheels by Paul McCartney, not Sinead O'Connor!

    But then, I began to wander around a little. I stumbled on another cool poem your wrote . . . awesome . . . on many levels:

    Think

    Posted on June 7, 2012 by tomasocarthaigh

    To think, it is freedom
    To think you have freedom to think…
    Some think they need freedom, forget
    That those who had that system were told what to think
    And if they had a thought of their own
    They were sent to rethink what they thought
    So they thought what they ought
    As decreed by those who controlled the freedom to think what they decreed.

    Some think this to be a criticism
    Of socialism and communism
    And one one level it is.
    But a more powerful criticism of the Catholic Church.

    Your video angle is really good. Here's an video example of poet, Linton Kwesi Johnson, called Inglan Is a Bitch:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zq9OpJYck7Y


    His delivery is highly stressed.


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