Financial Times and Relationships!

LegacyUser

Hi all,

so as you may have heard - Europe is in a recession! yes, all of it, not just ireland. And I'm out here in one of the worst hit countries Spain (25% unemployment) where I live with my boyfriend who is Spanish and who, miraculously, managed to get a 3 year research contract signed this month. This means he has an income - although meagre - in a job he loves for 3 years. Yay for him! but....and you can see it coming - I am unemployed.

His income is low and cant pay for two of us to live. I have been working overseas for a number of years and have been living off my savings from that job since I arrived here 8 months ago - these are now running out. This was a choice I made. I was tired of living so far away and wanted to give this relationship a real chance, so I bit the bullet and came back to Europe. I was certain i'd have got something by now. But I havent. (btw-i apparently cant get any dole despite paying contributions for 5 years because i'm not at home to sign on every month - if somebody on this board has a solution to that, please tell me)

So now its starting to impact our relationship - I'm worried about money. I'm not happy with my self esteem. Basically, i've become a complaining pain and i dont like myself too much. The other day he said to me that he'd prefer to see me abroad and happy and we have a distance relationship, than to have me here and unhappy all the time because i'm unemployed. I know he meant this well - like he doesnt want to hold me back..but this upset me because i really wanted to be together and LIVE together and make a full and proper effort at this relationship... and leaving seems like giving up somehow. Three years is a long time to be in a distance relationship, and there may not be any 'end point'...the way i see it is that he would have his life and friends and job here - and i'd have mine there...and no real plans to live together and share a life, except for weekends and Holidays.

I should say that he was fully ready to apply for research jobs in ireland or UK - he says he can move to where I like as long as he can work in his stuff. But then this funding came through for him here and of course we are both delighted he got it - so any potential country change wouldnt happen for 3 years now.

So friends - can you help with some advise? Do I tough it out or go abroad so i can earn an income? Is money more important than living together? Can anybody advice on the dole thing or, even better - give me a job in spain!!!!

feedback welcome as I'm at my wits end here staring at job sites...aaaaaaaaah

thanks
jj

LegacyUser

OP here; Any opinions welcome - I really would love to know if people think I should stick it out in tough recession times hoping to find any kind or work, so that i can be i same place as partner - or should I go abroad,do interesting work, and proper pay (hopefully) -but have no 'real' day to day life with partner for 3 years - possibly longer.

Advice really welcome

Curry Addict

you could come home, sign on here, and when you start to get your payment, you can then transfer it to spain, while you seek employment there.
i did this years ago, not sure of the rules nowadays but worth looking into.

Eve_Dublin

OP I live in Spain too. I teach English in Madrid. It's work you can get almost anywhere. PM if you need info.

Taltos

All - it is against our Charter to ask and OP to PM you. This is to protect you as well as protecting them. Breaches of our charter can result in immediate bans with no prior warning so please consider at all times if your response is appropriate for this forum.

Thanks
Taltos

Eve_Dublin

Sorry! I genuinely forgot.

OP, you can teach English wherever you're living and even better if you're in a town or city. You generally don't need a qualification although I got my TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) Certificate before I got here. It's not essential though. Usually the fact that your a native speaker is enough.

There's usually at least one academy in every town here.This is one area where there's no shortage of work as the Spanish need to learn English to either emigrate, get another job or secure their existing job. The country generally has a low level of English compared to other European countries (it might be at the bottom of the table actually), so there's huge demand.

And by the way, being Irish (which I presume you are?) is an advantage in this country when looking for work, particularly private work.

Also private lessons. Put up signs on shop windows, make leaflets to put in letterboxes, find if there's an ex pat website you can post an ad up on.

I charge 20 Euro an hour for private classes and I go to their homes. Some people charge more but I can't do it. Don't sell yourself short though. You need to make a living.

Salaries are low in Spain as you probably already know but teaching, if you get enough work, is actually a decent wage compared to other jobs.

There's loads of teaching stuff on the net you can use. Just type in either TEFL, ESL, ESL Lesson plans and ESL grammar into Google and you'll find loads of stuff.

If it's something you'd consider, let me know and I'll post those websites up for you if you like.

If you're going to work for an academy, more than likely you'll need to get an NIE and a Social Security number. This is easy but can be confusing if you don't know what you're doing. Info can be found on the net about that.

I'd also say really try and learn the local lingo. If you plan to stay in the country, you may as well make the most of your time here.

Let me know on this thread anyway if you're interested and I'll post more info for you.

Good luck!

iusedtoknow

I'm also in Madrid and second Eve's post

I work in the IT field and there is a lot of work out there at the moment in Madrid (my own company will soon have 60+ vacancies).

English teaching work is the way to go if you can't get work in your industry, get yourself a proper cert (from international house or CELTA) and go from there. My friend did this route and eventually was turning down work (within about 3 months). She was clearing around 1400 with the academy she was working with - a mixture of academy and business - she suplemented this with 10 hours or so of private classes (she charged between 20-30 depending on the circumstances of the class. August is not a good time for work, but it could be a good time for training. There are certain places you need to stay away from - i won't name names, but there is a crowd that will make you go autonimo - try find an academy that will pay your seguridad social. You'll be contracted initially for a minimum amount of hours, but they will soon add more and more on to you. Also, if you or your BF are under 30 you should apply for rent-allowance ASAP, you need to have an income less than 24000 and be the occupier/lease holder. My wife did this years ago - it takes a while to come through but is backdated and "vale la pena"

As for the dole, check with Irish social if you can transfer your payments over here - i know there is a way to do so, then you could at least try to claim paro for a few months until you are on your feet financially. A friend of mine did it - they got a form with their previous contributions and then went to the seguridad social which transferred it into a "vida laboral" which enabled them to get paro

Fortunately Spain is quite a cheap place to live on, and very cheap if you're in the right area - Madrid for a capital is extremely affordable, I lived in Barcelona for years and found that much more expensive.

Remember, you're european so you have certain rights, get a NIE and SS, and go from there. And as Eve said, post back here for any more info that you may need