Confused about sexting?

frump

Hey, long time since I posted anything on this, but been obsessing for a while.

Guy I know from one small area of my life was becoming a friend, we had personal issues from the past in common. Eventually led to sexting to a certain degree but only when it suited him and always on the same day of the week. When it didn't suit, he won't communicate at all but when his up for a quick w..k he gets flirty then dirty? My sex life has pretty much died apart from this which I guess is why I keep in touch with him.

Question:- how do I stop texting him when he can be all I think about sometimes. I know he's no good for me at all and is just using me, but I can't help myself?

blatantrereg

You're probably bored. Find other stuff to think about.

frump

Could well be that simple! Only he was teaching me something so I wouldn't be bored - that's how it all started!!! LOL!

Sardonicat

You might find it next to impossible to stop thinking about him but you CAN stop yourself responding to his texts.

It can be potentially very damaging to your self-esteem and self-respect when you get hung up on someone like this. If you were happy with a weekly phone quickie it wouldnt be a problem but clearly you can't leave it at that.

Recognising that the obsession is not healthy and therefore should not be acted upon might help. In otherwords, acknowledge to yourself that you have a problem obsessing over this guy. While you can't stop thinking about him you can prevent this obsession from damaging you too much by refusing to act on it. Eventually the obsession will fade.

To stop contacting him you could try deleting and blocking his number if your own resolve is not strong enough. Remember that your feelings for him are part of a type of compulsion and not the sign of true love. It's not a crime to be affected by obbsessions like this but until you learn how to take control of tham they can control you. Don't keep going back again and again to be made feel bad. You owe it to yourself to treat yourself better. No-one else can do that for you.

frump

Thanks for that, you are so right!

Gooner111

Am assuming you've told him that you want more than just texting? If you have then tell him the current status doesn't work for you anymore and say goodbye. Yes it will suck for awhile but overall it will be better for you.

Then hopefully you'll find someone who wants you as much as you want them.

Good luck

Piliger

Hi OP. Why do you want to stop texting him ? You don't really say. He is entertaining you at least one day a week which is better than none. I don't any sign of any unhealthy obsession in your post. Only a girl who wants more.
I think you should turn it from a passive thing of waiting for his day, and instead take control and enjoy the sexting day - after all you do say you enjoy it.
In the meantime there is no doubt that you need to get your social life in gear and start getting out and about so that you can move on to the real thing.