A minor issue just wondering has anyone come across this.....

LegacyUser

I don't even know if this is an issue but I'll give it a shot. Just would luv to know if anyone has experienced anything similar to my situation. I'm having issues with a few girls.......

I'm chatty bubbly person and get on really well with people. I do find myself sitting in most Saturday nights though. Most of my friends are in relationships and the window for socialising is slim. I do make an effort and have joined meetup groups etc.

One of my close friends who has a boyfriend has asked me to go on a girly holiday with her and her single friends who I have only met once. We all got on great when we met. I was delighted to be asked as I didn't expect a sun holiday this year and I didnt fancy going alone. The issue is the girls don't want me to go along as I'm also a single girl and the skinner one of the bunch and they said they won't have a chance with boys when I'm around.

I feel stupid even writting this as its so childish. I know about this as my close friend told me and she is embarrassed about the situation. I go on a holiday to relax and have fun not to meet lads. I am finding myself in similar situations trying to organise nights out with another friend who is also single. We usually meet for coffee or food. She wont go out with me to the pub because she assumes i will get all the attention. This is not the case. I'm rarely chatted up and I'm still single and sitting in on Saturday nights I've convinced her to go out Fri.

I would just luv to know how do you expand your social circle when stupid hurdles like this are being thrown up. I have tried loads of things to widden my social circle like meetup groups etc. When I come up against this I just get tired. I'd luv just to be able to go out on Sat with friends and if I get to go on a holiday too its a bonus. I am genuine and friendly. I'm not full of myself and I hope this hasnt come across. If anyone has some advise I'd really appreciate it. Maybe its just one of those things....

ButterflyABC

Obviously they are jealous of you and insecure in themselves. Not a lot you can do about that.

Ickle Magoo

Honestly OP, I think you need to find yourself a new group of friends.

There are lots of events and courses on over the summer, perhaps sign up to something of interest to you and see if you can't meet some like minded people with a bit more maturity and less self-interest than some of your current friends.

There are lots of discussion forums on Boards and many of them have beers nights and are a good opportunity to meet people too.

Don't feel bad tho, OP. Their behaviour is all about them, it's no reflection on you.

LegacyUser

I agree. As a male in a similar situation, I find it hard work to find people that want to do things without an agenda. Equally, I find it hard to find people who don't think I have the same agenda and distrust ensues. 'Why can't we just all be friends' I ask myself.

If your friends are only interested in going on pulling holidays and you're not, give it a miss or go and break off from them. If they're treating you like they're just going to ruin their plans, they don't sound like people I'd refer to as friends.

The Big Red Button

You've only met these girls once.

I'd be unlikely to spend hundreds of euro on a holiday with people I'd only ever met once.

Surely a holiday will be better if you're either spending good times with good people who you know well - or else enjoying some quality alone time.

You say that the issue is that the girls don't want you to go along for whatever reason. Then don't go along - no matter how silly their reasons are, it's not like you're missing out by not going. Who wants to go on a holiday when they're not wanted there?! Just organise your own separate holiday.

I do get the impression that you want to make new friends - but, by the sounds of it, these aren't the sort of friends that you need!!! :eek:

snafuk35

A minor Issue wrote: »

I don't even know if this is an issue but I'll give it a shot. Just would luv to know if anyone has experienced anything similar to my situation. I'm having issues with a few girls.......

I'm chatty bubbly person and get on really well with people. I do find myself sitting in most Saturday nights though. Most of my friends are in relationships and the window for socialising is slim. I do make an effort and have joined meetup groups etc.

One of my close friends who has a boyfriend has asked me to go on a girly holiday with her and her single friends who I have only met once. We all got on great when we met. I was delighted to be asked as I didn't expect a sun holiday this year and I didnt fancy going alone. The issue is the girls don't want me to go along as I'm also a single girl and the skinner one of the bunch and they said they won't have a chance with boys when I'm around.

I feel stupid even writting this as its so childish. I know about this as my close friend told me and she is embarrassed about the situation. I go on a holiday to relax and have fun not to meet lads. I am finding myself in similar situations trying to organise nights out with another friend who is also single. We usually meet for coffee or food. She wont go out with me to the pub because she assumes i will get all the attention. This is not the case. I'm rarely chatted up and I'm still single and sitting in on Saturday nights I've convinced her to go out Fri.

I would just luv to know how do you expand your social circle when stupid hurdles like this are being thrown up. I have tried loads of things to widden my social circle like meetup groups etc. When I come up against this I just get tired. I'd luv just to be able to go out on Sat with friends and if I get to go on a holiday too its a bonus. I am genuine and friendly. I'm not full of myself and I hope this hasnt come across. If anyone has some advise I'd really appreciate it. Maybe its just one of those things....

These "friends" are just childish and secure and pathetic.
Their jealousy is just a sad reflection on them.
I think you are better off not hanging around with them at all.

meg3178

Join Thelma and Louise, a site for women who want to travel/meet up. You don't have to spend every minute with the person, you can meet up, travel with the person, go off and do your own things and meet for drinks / dinner etc. www.thelmaandlouise.com there are women of all ages on it and from all over the world.

daisybelle2008

A minor Issue wrote: »

One of my close friends who has a boyfriend has asked me to go on a girly holiday with her and her single friends who I have only met once. We all got on great when we met. I was delighted to be asked as I didn't expect a sun holiday this year and I didnt fancy going alone. The issue is the girls don't want me to go along as I'm also a single girl and the skinner one of the bunch and they said they won't have a chance with boys when I'm around.

I know about this as my close friend told me and she is embarrassed about the situation. I go on a holiday to relax and have fun not to meet lads. I am finding myself in similar situations trying to organise nights out with another friend who is also single. We usually meet for coffee or food. She wont go out with me to the pub because she assumes i will get all the attention. This is not the case. I'm rarely chatted up and I'm still single and sitting in on Saturday nights I've convinced her to go out Fri.

....

I am finding this really really hard to get my head around. Not so much doubting your story but a bunch of girls who you met once and got on really well with told your close friend you were too skinny & hot to go on holiday with them??

Firstly why would your 'close' friend tolerate such ignorance from her friends. Seriously if my friends boycotted or excluded a good friend from a holiday on those grounds, well to be honest, there is no way that would happen, it would not be acceptable to do that. I can't imagine girls being that petty and being so upfront about their bullyboy behaviour. Where are you meeting these women?

I have been on a lot of girly holidays and nights out and never encountered anything like what you are describing and would consider myself and our group pretty decent looking.
In general anyone who ups the look of the group attracts more attention to the group as girls and guys often chat up each other in groups on hols.

LegacyUser

Hi,
Tks for all the responses. I think everyone comes across this at some stage. Its good to hear other peoples view on it. I suppose it would be just too perfect if everyone just got on and didnt have their own agenda.
I think I will give the holiday a miss and hopefully something else pops up

Thanks again.