Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Family closeness... would like advice :)

  • 16-07-2012 2:52pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I didn't really know where to get advice about this so I thought I would try here. :)

    I'm a college student, I live with my mom + partner, and my dad lives nearby with his younger kids + their mom. I have a large extended family who I get on well with, I'm not particularly close to either parent.

    Everything was fine when I was younger, but now that I'm fairly independent and doing my own thing I often feel a bit left out of family goings-on. I'm not really part of any one family unit, I just sort of float around alone and it seems I sometimes don't get invited to family stuff (people either forget about me, or assume somebody else will have taken the responsibility to ask me), and am just out of touch with everything that's going on.

    I see friends around me who still go on family holidays, have family traditions at Christmas, do stuff together, etc. and I just feel a bit isolated.

    I'm just wondering if anybody has any ideas about becoming closer to everyone? To my parents and younger siblings as well as to aunts, uncles, etc. (as the families are quite close-knit apart from me). I want to take action... I feel like I've mentioned that I feel this way to certain family members before but nothing ever really changes, it's not really enough. I want to get more involved with everyone. Does anybody have any suggestions? :)


Comments

  • #2
    purplepapillon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 118 ✭✭purplepapillon


    Hi OP

    Maybe you should try with a beginning step. You say your dad, his partner your younger siblings live close by. Why not simply drop by one day for a cuppa? It's a little step, but if you do it once a week, maybe go for dinner there, they may see that you would like to get to know them and encourage you to come back for example every Tuesday evening for argument's sake. If the siblings are young, offer to mind them for your dad and his partner.

    Spend some time at home with your mam. Does she have any hobbies (e.g. gardening, baking) that you could participate in? Or something small that she does regularly.

    Extended family, the same advice. Drop by for a cuppa, offer to babysit cousins.

    Once these things become regular, everything will just come easily and you won't think of "family traditions" of your friends' families, but of your own. Every family is different.

    Best wishes


Advertisement