My name on daughters birth cert

dMoniKer

Hi guys,

Just thought id post here and see if i could get some good advice. I have an 18 month old daughter with my ex girlfriend. We are on good terms and i see her regularly thank god. But when she originally had our daughter we had broken up and my name was never put on the birth cert.

For some reason last week when i brought up the fact that im still not on it, even though i pay maintenance and am involved in my childs life, she was and still is dead against me getting my name put on it.

This is greatly upsetting for me as all i want is a recognition of parentage. I dont want for it to go to court and get nasty, all i want is my name on my daughters birth cert!!!

Does anybody have any advice and how i should go about this? I have a legal right to have my name on my childs birth certificate do i not?

Thanks in advance guys.

Ickle Magoo

Irish law does not currently require a father’s details to be included on the birth certificate.

It might be worth contacting Registrar of Births, Deaths & Marriages for the district in which the birth in question took place and asking what, if anything, you can do but afaik, births can be re-registered but only with the consent of both parents.

It might also be worth pointing out to your ex that also under Irish law having your name and details on the birth certificate gives you no legal entitlements whatsoever - if that's something she's concerned about - it just ensures your daughter can clearly see who both their parents are on their birth certificate.

All the very best.

neemish

It might also be worth speaking to a solicitor/free legal aid about applying for Joint Guardianship for your child. At the moment, if you are not married to the mother you basically have no rights in regards to your wishes for you child's education, health etc.
It's not about getting nasty - its about ensuring the best for all involved. This might not seem important now, but the earlier you apply the better. If you break up with her mother, do you want to still be involved in the decision making for your daughter?

P. Breathnach

neemish wrote: »

It might also be worth speaking to a solicitor/free legal aid about applying for Joint Guardianship for your child....

That's a potential minefield.

It seems to me a fair guess that the reason why the mother doesn't want OP's name on the birth record is that she fears that it might compromise her position vis-a-vis guardianship.

It looks as if right now OP's position in relation to the child is in some ways satisfactory. Paternity is recognised through payment of maintenance and the granting of access.

A problem might arise if the mother got married and an effort were made to arrange a step-parent adoption. An application would probably not succeed if OP objected (my opinion, not a legal expert's advice). See http://www.aai.gov.ie/index.php/domestic-adoption/step-parent-adoption.html.

As I said: a minefield.

if i was you OP i would get proper legal advise on this.
i was born to an unmarried mother and apart from anything else, if my fathers name wasnt on the birth cert it would make me feel bad. ( my dads name is )

even if i never had anything to do with him i think its important to people to see in writing where there came from. look at all the adopted people in ireland over the years that couldnt get their birth certs and when they did eventually they only had half a story.

maybe try and sell it to your baby's mother like that? take any emphasis away from custody/rights etc.??

P. Breathnach

P. Breathnach wrote: »

It seems to me a fair guess that the reason why the mother doesn't want OP's name on the birth record is that she fears that it might compromise her position vis-a-vis guardianship.

Considering the OP said he's on good terms with the mother and is only looking for a recognition of parentage, it's likely that the maintenance is a mutual agreement rather than a legal arrangement. If that's true, then the mother's real concern could be her position with regards to welfare etc.

OP, if the issue is to do with her position in terms of means testing or payment entitlements, or even if she is worried about guardianship, pushing this could be putting her in a less advantageous position and could cause a serious rift between the two of you.

As much as it's an unfair position to be in, as a father not on the birth cert you'll probably be highly dependent on the good will of the mother until your child is old enough to demand to see you. As much as it's unfair that you can't get the recognition you deserve, going against the mother's wishes could cause you serious long term stress and possibly even access issues. I'd recommend that it isn't worth it, and that if your child grows up calling you "Dad", that's the most important recognition you need.

ted1

I think child benefit should be with held if there is no name on the birth cert. Un married fathers have no rights in this country its crazy. Fathers should be given the same rights, but should also be held responsible.

The_Conductor

I'd have to concur- everything else being equal (and we don't know whether everything else is ok or not), the only reason for refusing to countenance having the father's name added to an amended birth certificate (and they do amend them in certain cases- as of 2010)- is to hide the paternity of the child, and potentially use the situation to claim lone parents allowance or other social welfare assistance, were it known that the father of the child is supporting his daughter.

OP- unfortunately you're on a journey to no-where with this. I'd suggest normalising any maintenance agreement- so its taken into account if your situation changes, your daughter will receive what she is entitled to, come what may.

Its unfortunate that men are considered so lowly in Irish family law, and the rectification of this is a battle that some of the most highly respected feminists in the country are also trying to remedy (look at comments from Ivana Bacik for example, while she has her own agenda, she has been instrumental in bringing father's rights to the fore).

Moonbeam

Ask her for guardianship and apply for it either way.

StillWaters

There is legislation planned that fathers names must be placed on the birth Cert.
Rightly so. It is almost always left off in the unfounded belief that to have the name on inhibits social welfare payments and/or gives legal rights. Not so.

OP were I you, I would definitely seek guardianship. You are now in the unenviable position of being afraid to rock the boat and having very little legal right to your own child.

uch

AFAIK Both parents have to agree and sign for Guardianship (this was the case when I had to do it 15 years ago), so if she's not willing to budge on birthcert what makes you think she'd budge on Guardianship

Taltos

Can posters stay on point with the OPs initial question. Guardianship, father's rights etc are all off topic. The OP is seeking advice on how to get their name added to the birth certificate, nothing more at this point.

Please note off topic posting is a breach of our charter.

DamagedTrax

as far as i know the only way to get your name on the birth cert without the mother having to agree is to obtain joint guardianship and go from there.

LittleBook

OP, there's a Parenting Forum here which deals with the ins and outs of questions like this regularly, they are very helpful and, for the most part, very well informed.

In the meantime, here's some information on the subject from Citizensinformation.ie.

For children born outside of marriage in Ireland, only the mother has automatic rights to guardianship. Even though a father's name may be registered on the child's birth certificate, this does not give him any guardianship rights in respect of his child.

Legalities and technicalities aside, it's important you find out WHY your ex-girlfriend is so against this idea and deal with it from there. You (and your child) have every right to your name on the birth certificate.

dMoniKer

Thank you very much for all the input guys, very much appreciated. Fortunately we`ve come to an agreement.

I fully agree that fathers` rights in Irish law is horrifying, im one of the lucky ones...

Taltos

As you've come to an arrangement I am going to go ahead and close this now.

All the best
Taltos