In laws driving me insane

LegacyUser

i realise there are people with a lot more serious issues on here but hear me out please,sorry if this seems petty. My In laws are from the other side of the country and are staying with us for 2 weeks while they have building work done on their house, which was fine by me initially.
long story short its a week down now and they are both driving me mad! The mother is insisting on cooking since she got here which is a nice gesture in itself but i've just had a baby so im working hard on trying to get back to my normal weight so iv made a food plan for myself which iv been sticking to for 2 months and is working great. However, she has my breakfast ready for me every morning (sandwich or a fry up) even tho i've asked her not to. I dont eat sandwiches for breakfast i prefer cereal.
She also makes ridiculously huge mammy dinners and gets highly insulted if you dont finish whats on your plate. ive tried to explain to her that im watching my weight but she keeps saying that im just "being ridiculous" and thinks i dont like her cooking.
The last 2 days i put my foot down and ate what id normally eat myself and she went to my husband and told him that i have a problem with food and its a wonder that my hubby wasnt losing weight as well.
im also a smoker, about 10 a day or less. The father is constantly passing comments to the mother as if im not even there that the house is smelly when i come in etc etc.Now i know its a bad habit but ive never smoked inside the house i always go outside so its not like im sitting there puffing into his face.
what would you do if you were me? should i just put up and shut up for the sake of another week or put my foot down and cause arguments?
im being made to feel like a bold school child in my own house, im 30 years of age for gods sake!

ABajaninCork

I'd suck it up for another week TBH. She probably thinks she's being helpful, bless her! But I'd also do the following:

Tell her not to bother making you breakfast. You can do your own.

If she makes dinner, eat your normal portion. Ignore any comments she makes.

If they complain about the smoke. Well, if they don't like it, they're free to leave!

I know what you mean about feeling like a child. I smoke, albeit not in the house. My mother came round one day, and complained about the smell of smoke when I came in. Took it for a while, then calmly told her if she didn't like it , then leave. She soon shut up!

If all else fails, then it's only one more week. Grit your teeth girl - You can do it!!:pac:

The Lovely Muffin

Speak to your husband and ask him to speak to your parents on your behalf.

You should not have to put up with this kind of behaviour in your own home.

Could you bite your tongue for another week and just continue doing your own thing and eating your own food etc?

Also, if the work on their house takes longer than originally planned, will they be staying with you for longer? If that happens, then I would ask your husband to speak to his parents and tell them to quit their behaviour.

However, I would bite my tongue for the next week and do my own thing, eat what I want etc.

No one, absolutely no one has the right to treat you or speak to you in your own home, like your in law's are.

If they are so unhappy with you and your home, they won't mind finding somewhere else to stay.

Kimia

Call them on it when they make these remarks but in a kill them with kindness way.

If she says that you hate her cooking, say to her that that really hurts your feelings and that if you could, you would devour the whole plate because you love her cooking but you're trying really hard to lose some weight and really need her support.

If they say that your house is smelly, say right there, that that's a really hurtful thing to say and that you try your best to ensure that your smoking doesn't affect the house atmosphere as you've been careful to go outside.

This way, you're not fighting with them, you're giving them the opportunity to feel that parenting buzz that they want. They may feel a little pushed aside and useless so making them feel needed and as if you really care about their opinions will help, even if you have to grit your teeth.

For example, I bet if you put it that way to the MIL, she would be so touched that you confided in her and asked for her support on your weight that she would probably change her whole style of cooking to suit you and so that she feels she's being useful.

Give it a try and good luck!