What is wrong with him?

LegacyUser

I have a brother in his early thirties who exhibits the weirdest character and personality traits I'm aware of. These range from;

> Can't stay at a table eating food with family because he hates the noise of chewing food and also of cutlery cracking against the plates.

> Moved out of our house to one not too far away and always gets his mother to make him lunch and dinner everyday. He appears to have moved out just on peer pressure reasons given he's in his early thirties and simply wanted to say he had a house.

> He doesn't do any shopping and instead gets his parents to buy his food and drink in the shop and then pays them and collects it at the house. Indeed, he doesn't even buy his own milk or bread even. His fridge and freezer is almost empty apart from the basics.

> Incredibly vain and always worries about how he looks and tries to wear the best clothes.

> Punches and kicks walls regularly if he hears farting or belching, sometimes quite hard. Despite the condemnation we give him, he continues to do this in our house despite having his own.

> When he does eat lunch and dinner at our house, he does it either when nobody else is around, or while putting earphones on to block out any noises he deems irritating.

> Constantly talks about one of his few friends as if he idolizes him. It's rare for a day to go by without hearing a discussion related to what this friend is doing. It seems slightly unusual to hear it so regularly.

> He generally appears to have no initiative or have any form of responsibility. He always gets other people to do his stuff for him and very seldom does anything of his own volition.

> Finally, he rarely decides to make any decisions unless it was accepted or endorsed by the family. For example, nothing would be done in the garden unless it was done in our garden or if he gained the re-assurance that it was a good thing to do.

It's pretty hard to mention all these weird patterns of behaviour but I've tried to mention the main ones here. Some of these things may at first glance appear to be superficially insignificance, but on the grand scale, they all add up to what seems to be a very disturbed individual. He lacks any form of responsibility for himself despite being near his mid-thirties and relies on his parents for food and meals despite not living with us for a while.

What do you guys think of this situation? Is it resolvable at all? Can you see any patterns here which are important?

Thanks in advance for any replies.

Ickle Magoo

Hey there misophonic,

We are not allowed to make diagnoses - we are just not qualified and guessing what/if anything is wrong is not going to help you or your brother.

If he needs help or a diagnosis then he'll need to get that from a professional...perhaps describe the symptoms to your own GP and get their opinion?

All the very best.