Ex boyfriend

LegacyUser

ok i dont even really know where to start, I was going out with my ex for 6 months and I ended it just recently. Alot happened over the 6 months and i think i still havent registered it all yet. Everything seemed fine at the start and about 2 months into the relationship he said he needed space to see was i the one he wanted to be with, he was with his ex girlfriend for 7 years and got into a relationship with me about 3 months after it ended with her.
Anyhow on the day he said he needed space, a friend of mine committed suicide so my mind wasnt even on him, 4 days later my little brother committed suicide, understandly i was and am devastated, with no contact since he needed space he sent a text to say he was sorry about my brother and he came to the funeral, a few days later we got back together.
Then he started acting weird again saying that were in the start of our relationship and we should be having fun?????? I'm sorry but i did just bury my brother. He shared a photo of his ex on his facebook and i asked him to take it down and he said he would but didnt so when i seen it still there a few days later i said it to him again and he said everything was drama and that he would be better off single, so i finished it with him then.
I have a 10 year old daughter also and he started saying that if we were going to be together longterm that he wanted control over her, so i asked in what sense and he said that if she was doing something wrong that he would be able to tell her go to her room or ground her, there was no way i would stand for that so i said if she was doing something wrong and i wasnt there that he could tell me and id deal with it, i thought that was fair enough seeing as he had only been around for 6 months and had just met her. Her father has also passed away and he didnt like me talking about him.
out of all this what i dont understand is if he didnt want to be with me why would he come back at the worst time of my life to just want to leave and be single again?
I texted him to say we could be friends if he wanted and he said he did, there was a little chit chat and i thought everything was ok, he wrote on my facebook a few days later, there was another little chit chat then, the next week he was going away for the weekend so i sent him a text saying enjoy yourself and got nothing back, sorry for the long message, i dont even know if this would bother me normally or am i using it to take my mind off everything else going on, any insight would be appreciated, Thanks in advance

Ellsbells

Pet you have enough going on without entertaining this fella. he sounds like he has huge issues. Concentrate on your kid, yourself and learning how to deal with your loss and don't give him the time of day. Plenty of nice guys out there who won't mind-Fu€k you like he is doing.

Sorry for your losses.

ennis81

what a sh*t, you look after yourself hunny and don't give this loser anymore of your time, sorry for your troubles hope some happiness comes your way soon

Herrick

Sorry for your losses OP. I think you are both better apart as it seems like he's not sure what he wants.

seriously confused wrote: »

I have a 10 year old daughter also and he started saying that if we were going to be together longterm that he wanted control over her, so i asked in what sense and he said that if she was doing something wrong that he would be able to tell her go to her room or ground her, there was no way i would stand for that so i said if she was doing something wrong and i wasnt there that he could tell me and id deal with it, i thought that was fair enough seeing as he had only been around for 6 months and had just met her.

I was just wondering about this bit. Were you against the fact of him being able to ground her because he barley knew her and was only with you a while? Which makes sense.

I was just thinking though say if you and he were together a couple of years and move in together. What would your opinion be on the above then? Would a potential long term partner have no say over bad behavior and still have to go through you?

LegacyUser

Herrick wrote: »

Sorry for your losses OP. I think you are both better apart as it seems like he's not sure what he wants.



I was just wondering about this bit. Were you against the fact of him being able to ground her because he barley knew her and was only with you a while? Which makes sense.

I was just thinking though say if you and he were together a couple of years and move in together. What would your opinion be on the above then? Would a potential long term partner have no say over bad behavior and still have to go through you?

Thanks for the replies
No I would have no problem with that if he was actually living with us, had built a stable and trusting relationship with her and treated her with respect but the message that i got from him was that he wanted control now and wanted to be able to tell her what to do. It wrecks my head that he was so adamant that he was around for the long term, pushed to meet my daughter and then just changed his mind, he was the 1st relationship that i had since her father passed 7 years ago so he was the first guy in her life aside from her uncle who she recently lost aswell, Ive definetly learned some lessons