pregnacy - scared of losing my figure!

LegacyUser

So I know I might get some stick for this but hear me out. I'm 32 and my boyfriend and I are discussing getting pregnant. Obviously I'm exited about the idea but one thing worries me, and I am aware it sounds shallow. Basically my mum had a good figure until she had children and afterwards became very obese. I work hard to keep trim and exercise all the time and I suppose I'm concerned that this will be it for me now. My mum always says "I used to be beautiful before I had kids" and to be honest that scares me. My mum and dad split up after my dad left her for another woman so I suppose deep down thats whats behind my fears of becomming unattractive. I work out 5 days a week and have done for over ten years, plus I'm very sporty. As a pregnant woman and as a mother I wont have time for exercise and I'm terrified.
I suppose what I want to know is, can any mums out there tell me how they felt after having their first? Is it as bad as my mum makes out? Will all my size-8 clothes be relegated forever to the back of the wardrobe? I'm sorry if this sounds totally crazy but it is something that is genuinely bothering me, right or wrong...

edellc

Stop being so vain OP, if your thinking about starting a family there is no room for vainness, if you are fit and healthy and exercise regularly then why will this change when you are pregnant, you can still exercise you don't need to sit on your arse eating ice cream for the whole lot of it, and when baby is born yes it takes a couple of weeks/months to get used to the baby but then you can go back to working out, if you have family to support you then they can watch baby as you go to the gym some even have crèches, you can also speed walk or run with a stroller, and if your going back to work I'm sure baby will be in childcare so you could go gym before you start work, if you really want to keep it up you can

tbh when baby comes you really don't give a sh*t about how you look as you are just in awe of this amazing little person who you have given birth too and all things that where important before you had them fade into nothing and your priorities in life and out look on life are so completely different

Morag

Yes your body will change but there is no reason why you will end up obese unless you stop eating the right things and stop exercising. If it is important to you, you will find time
be it with a buggy you can run with, or a threadmill/bike at home or taking part in sport at the weekends/evenings.

If you find your head is spinning out over this, then go talk to a professional, go to your dr and ask for a referal and don't let the fear get the better of you.

P. Breathnach

Look around you, OP. There are plenty of young mothers who have great figures, as well as some who don't (and some of those who don't might not have had a great figure before becoming pregnant). Pregnancy does not necessarily lead to loss of your figure.

The real threat to your figure is lifestyle. I don't agree that you would not have time for exercise: your exercise regime can be adapted to your change in circumstances. And if you are a bit of an exercise junkie, I am sure you already know that if you become less active for a while, you need to adjust your calorie intake.

Beruthiel

edellc wrote: »

Stop being so vain OP, if your thinking about starting a family there is no room for vainness

No need to be so harsh edellc.
Her concerns are valid so reel it in a tad please.

ennis81

I understand your fears.... no you will not lose your figure, you are already fit and healthy and you can continue with gentle exercise like yoga pilates etc for pregnancy. Alot of women over eat while pregnant and then are SHOCKED when they have piled on the weight. Just eat sensibly and you'll be fine. Friend of mine 33 like yourself v sporty has just had second baby and few months later looks better than ever and yes she does still find time to go to the gym. My mother put on weight gradually after having 5 of us, my sister who has had 5 kids in 9 years is a size 10 her last baby was born in December, anyway rest assured pregnancy does not automatically make you fat!! Good luck hope all goes well for you;)

SurferRosa

Hi there, I think that's a completely natural way to feel about pregnancy - I wouldn't feel bad for thinking that.
My mother had 2 kids, and she has never been slim again since.
That said I've had 2 and am pregnant on my 3rd. I have always been slim, and in a way it just wasn't right for me to have extra weight as in, as soon I felt fit (I had c-sections) I started to exercise again.
I lost all my pregnancy weight on both within 6months to a year after giving birth. In fact after my first I had no car and had to push him everywhere in his pram. The town was a 25 min walk, and sometimes I'd walk all around running errands and visit pals. I think I was in better shape than I had been my whole life( never tended to exercise much before).
That said somethings will never be the same e.g your belly/bellybutton,breasts. I sometimes think, God why didn't you appreciate what you had when you were "perfect", but then again your body will age/sag anyway. Maybe not as quickly and as obviously as when you have kids, but my youthful body wasn't ever going to stay so permanently - kids or not.
In my opinion they are worth it anyway! Good luck

Neyite

OP, I got back into my pre-pregnancy jeans 15 days after birth,:D and I had a C-section, so any exercise was off limits and still is until I get to six weeks post partum which is next week. So, its do-able. According to my nurse, the breastfeeding helped immensely.

You are not vain. I am very low maintenance, rarely wear makeup, and dont own a weighing scales, but even with that, seeing other women whose figures had gone to pot at my ante-natal appointments, especially in the early days of pregnancy, I feared I'd end up a shapeless mass that no amount of exercise would fix.

But, if you are healthy and toned to start with pre-pregnancy, and eat healthily during pregnancy, with gentle exercise, there is no reason that you would lose your figure, a healthy fit body will bounce back. The one thing I kept in mind during pregnancy was that I didnt need to eat for two. You need proper nutrition yes, but not double helpings! Go swimming, walking, and maybe pregnancy yoga, These will also benefit you stamina-wise for labour.

So, dont worry, and Congrats!!

Neyite

Oh, and I'm a size 8 - all through pregnancy too. I can see my tummy muscles are not far off what they were before I got pregnant, so it wont take long once I'm allowed to exercise to bring them back into shape I hope.

Oryx

Pregnancy makes certain changes but you won't lose your figure unless you quit taking care of it. I always said it wasn't the pregnancy that put on weight it was eating the kids food and treats as well as your own afterwards when they are toddlers.

It is a valid fear if your body is important to you. But given that you have that mindset you will be fine. Of all my friends who have children, the only ones who are carrying a bit of weight are those for who it isn't really something they worry about.

Pregnancy does not change your physiology so you pile on weight afterwards. But with some women priorities change or time pressure means its harder to exercise or eat well.

You wanted personal anecdotes. In my own case I have two kids and I'm in better shape than at any point in my life before. What happened to your mum does not have to happen to you.

Sleepy

You'll only be fat after giving birth if you eat too much and exercise too little. Many women use pregnancy as an excuse to completely stop looking after their figures and as such, it's now a very common misconception that you'll be fat after having kids.

There will be changes: you might get a few stretch marks, experience some loosening of the vaginal muscles (or stitches) or a caesarian scar should you opt for a C Section.

There's plenty of mothers out there with incredible figures: nothing to be scared of at all.

starlit

Op, your body is bount to change not only during pregnancy but after pregnancy too but only very minor things really. Its possible to be neat while pregnant if you keep fit and trim, eat healthily and keep it up after pregnancy. You might go up a size but every woman is different, it might have happened to your mam but you are a different person with a different body.

Its possible to regain your figure after pregnancy. You keep fit as it is, why not keep doing that while your are pregnant its all part of it to gain a certain amount of weight while expecting but once the baby is born you be able to loose the weight gradually, you work hard enough as it is to keep fit, its possible to do the same after pregnancy! There are special work outs for pregnant and post pregnancy women out there I am sure. Keep fit and healthy you'll have nothing to worry about. Still no reason to worry about losing your figure. Have you looked into yoga?

bubbaloo

OP - I think it's different for everyone. I lost over a stone on my pregnancy and then balooned once he arrived - because I sat at home for 6 months stuffing my face out of boredom! It's up to the individual - if you are health conscious you will make the effort to eat well and do some excercise. Having a baby in a buggy is a great excuse to get out for a walk. If you want to keep in shape you will. If you don't, you won't! If you know what I mean? Good luck.

analucija

Well we get fatter with age anyway, so I wouldn't worry too much.

I went back to roughly the same weight than before pregnancy after 9 months or a year. Your lifestyle is way more important than if you have children or not and you have to find some time for yourself anyway (children or no children). It can be very hard if you don't. Oh and breastfeeding does help with loosing weight a lot.

LegacyUser

Be as vain as you want to be.

You can get your body into any shape you want to get it if you're willing to put in the time and are willing to eat well and Once you're back in a position where you can exercise.

It's not as if you won't have anytime to exercise... babies do sleep. Get yourself a set of weights and you can exercise at home.

There are plenty of links on youtube for doing weights while pregnant.

hoodwinked

op i wouldn't worry about it,

after i had our daughter i kept the weight on for about 6 -12 months afterwards (it was too cold to be bringing her outside for walks so i ended up mostly sitting around looking after her), it was only when she became an active toddler i was able to start losing weight chasing after her, bending over for most of the day while walking her around, constantly running around picking things up..etc

im back to my pre-pregnancy size and thanks to an 100% natural birth (and bio-oil) i have no stretch marks or scars, you'd never know i had her by my body.

i know i was lucky too to get back this way but i wouldn't avoid the joy of having a child for the risk your body will change, you never know how things will work out.

seamus

Yours is a fairly common concern, and without sugar coating it you will spend a lot of your pregnancy concerned that you're becoming a big fat heffalump, even though it's plainly obvious that you have a child growing inside you.

I guess the speed at which the changes occur, catches many women off-guard and they worry about whether they're growing at the right rate, or too quick, or whatever.

You seem like you're already very aware of your health and managing your weight, so you're probably worrying about something which will never occur.

Exercise is not something that you have to dump when you become pregnant. Running, cycling, swimming, all of these things are perfectly fine when you're pregnant. The problem is that many women find the first trimester to be constant exhaustion, and the thought of exercise just makes them shiver. This can result in 3 months without exercise, which makes it hard to get back into it when your energy returns.
But if you aim to just do a small amount of exercise in this period, then you can get back into it properly, doing almost a full amount of training for the 2nd trimester. Many women are uncomfortable with running or cycling (for example) due to the risk of tripping or falling, so perhaps swimming or a similar no-risk exercise is the way to go.

If you already watch what you eat, then you can keep that up in pregnancy and afterwards. You're not going to be eating for two, which is a mistake some people make. In most cases, eating about 10-15% above your normal maintenance intake is spot-on.

And one key thing to remember is that you will gain weight if you get pregnant. You have to, it's a natural biological mechanism to prepare you for the time after the child is born.

Really the key determinant is how you deal with it once the child is born. If you maintain your current diet regime, the weight will disappear again. Weight loss is 95% diet, 5% exercise. So even if you end up never exercising again, you can still get back to your pre-pregnancy weight.

That said, you will have time for exercise. My wife is expecting in October, and pretty much the only exercise change I expect to make is switching my running from the evening (after work, when she needs me the most) to the morning (before work, when she needs me the least).

Older Irish women (i.e. our Mammies) often have difficulty with obesity in later years because of the tradition of having children back-to-back. Every woman gains weight in pregnancy. The problem is that if you fall pregnant again before you've shed your initial baby weight, then you've twice as much work to do on the far side. If you do this 3 or 4 times in a row, you're lining yourself up for obesity.

All of the above said, weight is not a one-way street. No matter how young or old, big or small someone is, they can lose weight. You will gain weight during pregnancy, but you can lose it again. And quickly too. The fact that you've recognised this as an issue likely means you won't let it happen.

solerina

Talk to your doctor to check but Id imagine you can keep exercising while pregnant, one of my friends, who runs a lot, kept running until she was 7 months and only had to slow down a bit....after this she walked until 2 weeks before birth....and she was back running 5 weeks after each of her 3 babies baby was born....she never lost her figure, as long as your doctor says its ok then you can do similar !!

eviltwin

Anyone who has nine months of eating rubbish will end up fat no matter what gender they are, I used my first pregnancy as an excuse to eat anything and everything so it was a given I was going to put on weight, the pregnancy hides it to an extent because you can't tell what is pregnancy gain and what is the result of bad habits but if someone takes the approach I did the pregnancy is not to blame.

When I got pregnant for the second time I was very sensible and actually ended up losing weight...I think because I cut out a lot of the junk I was normally having.

Having a healthy lifestyle won't just help you stay slim, it will give your baby the best start and exercise will help you with labour and recovery.

Don't feel vain because you are not but talk to your partner and let him know how you feel, part of the problem I think is when you feel ugly and your partner doesn't make you feel beautiful. Its funny cause when I look at photos of me towards the end of my pregnancies all I see is really gorgeous woman and not the lump I felt I had become. It might of helped to hear it more though at the time

embee

After you have a baby, certain aspects of your body will change and will never be exactly the way they were before pregnancy and birth. The way you actually carry weight on your body may change - the strong abdominal muscles which before a first pregnancy are usually very taut (even in overweight women) become more lax due to prolonged stretch strain and the effect of contractions during labour, and no amount of sit ups will make it ever be exactly how it was before. Diet and exercise will help enormously and your GP and midwife will be able to advise you on these aspects.

Lalaloca

Pregnancy did not ruin my figure. Eating industrial quantities of biccies "cos I'm breastfeeding" may have had a part to play......

IvyTheTerrible

I have a four month old baby, and I weigh 5kgs less today than the day I conceived! I did NOT go on a diet but I ate good food while pregnant (lots of fruit and veg, proper meals etc) and did a lot of light exercise (I wasn't a big fan of exercise before my pregnancy but once I couldn't move as easily, I was dying to exercise!). Then, after the birth, I breast feed, I don't have time for snacking and I walk everywhere with the baby so the baby weight just fell off. I feel great.

My mother put on a lot of weight after having 4 kids, so I understand your worries about losing your figure. But then, she ate all around her and did no exercise. If, like me you eat healthily for you and your baby and do a bit of exercise you'll be grand.

curlzy

Hey OP,

First of all i hope you're listening to everyone (bar one :rolleyes:) here that's saying you're not vain and that you're gonna be fine. Worrying really isn't good for you so I hope you take all the good news on board.

I don't have any children yet but my fiancée's sister has 2 and she's got an amazing figure. I'm a size 8/10 (and happy with it) but she's always been thinner than me and that's even right after the birth of her second! Like others have said she didn't sit on her ass doing nothing and eating rubbish. I think if you're as health conscious and weary of ending up like your mam you'll probably over compensate and end up in even better shape!

Also just wanna say that to me, all pregnant women are beautiful, they glow and look like mother nature so even if you do put on a teeny bit of weight it evens out : )

CathyMoran

I have a one year old and two year old and am 38, I still fit into size 8 jeans - yes I am heavier than I was in my teens (about 4 lb heavier) but I was way too skinny and I am getting older. Looking after young children is an exercise routine in itself, I was below my pre pregnancy weight a week after I had my son (and I had a c-setion).

JoeyW

OP, you won't lose your figure if you don't want to but you do have to work at it.
I ate like a horse on both my pregnancies but I did lots of walking and swimming so the weight fell off me both times. My second is 3 months old and my figure us back to size 8 but I'm a very active person still.
My friend had her baby 4 years ago and still looks 6 months pregnant because she hit lazy and gave up all her walking the minute she got pregnant.

xzanti

I lost all my baby weight within 7 months of having my Son.. just don't go mad eating when pregnant.. The "eating for 2" thing is a complete myth.. Just eat as normal, your baby will take everything it needs anyway.. they don't have manners yet

Get out and exercise as much as you can, unless your Doctor advises you to take it easy, there is really nothing stopping you getting out for a good walk every day while you're expecting..

Just be sensible and you should be fine.

Also there are great creams and oils you can get to minimize stretchmarks..

I am a friend

I was a size 6 /8 when I got pg but I was so nauseous and tired for the first 4 months that I put up the weight then (1 stone) that I still haven't lost. I am a size 10 now and baby is 6 months but hasn't slept much so I don't have the energy to exercise like before. Am determined to be back to 8 by the first birthday.

Just try to find something healthy to snack on when you feel sick.

Why not go to a personal trainer when pg to find out what exercises you can continue to safely do?

ceadaoin.

Just don't use pregnancy as an excuse to gorge on rubbish food and you'll be grand! You only need an extra couple of hundred calories a day once you get into the later stages so the whole 'eating for two' thing is nonsense.

I put on 3 stone when I was pregnant and I had lost most of that within the first couple of weeks after giving birth. Granted, I am slightly flabbier around my tummy but nothing that a bit of exercise won't fix. I can fit into my pre pregnancy size 8 clothes and all the walking I'm doing with the baby is helping me to drop the last few pounds.

So don't stress, just because you get pregnant, doesn't mean to have to lose control of your body totally. Just make sure to eat healthy foods (and don't deny yourself the occasional treat )

xzanti

Also, you'll find that a lot of weight you gain during pregnancy is actually fluid, which tends to disappear quite quickly.. The 'sausage fingers and cankles' are only temporary.. Thank God!!!

up for anything

edellc wrote: »

tbh when baby comes you really don't give a sh*t about how you look as you are just in awe of this amazing little person who you have given birth too and all things that where important before you had them fade into nothing and your priorities in life and out look on life are so completely different

More than losing your figure, OP, you need to make sure that you don't turn into the Stepford mother type person described above. Of course some things that are important to you will not so important when you have less time and energy to devote to them and some of your priorities in life will change or be completely different. This however doesn't mean that you will undergo a complete transformation into a maternal goddess. :rolleyes:

Making sure your baby gets lots of fresh air though is one of those things you will need to ensure and that will gel with your need to keep fit and get your figure back. Buggy with good suspension, warm gear for the baby and rain cover for the buggy and you can jog/walk your way back to your size 8 and that is supposing you lose it it in the first place. I passed a woman today who must have been at least 8 months pregnant and a size 6-8. You would never even know she was pregnant from her back view.

xzanti

up for anything wrote: »

More than losing your figure, OP, you need to make sure that you don't turn into the Stepford mother type person described above. Of course some things that are important to you will not so important when you have less time and energy to devote to them and some of your priorities in life will change or be completely different. This however doesn't mean that you will undergo a complete transformation into a maternal goddess. :rolleyes:

Exactly, you don't have to let yourself go in order to be a good Mother, there needs to be a good balance and there certainly can be..

Happy Mother, happy child.. Never a truer word said IMHO.

LegacyUser

I was pregnant 4 times and lost the weight I gained after each pregnancy. In fact, I was not able to exercise throughout my pregnancies (bed ridden) and I bounced back to shape about 4 months or more after each birth.

Because of the lack of exercise whilst pregnant, I really watched what I ate. Since I was not even allowed to lift a finger and was in bed most of the time, I didn't eat too much, just small meals and healthy snacks. I spoke with a dietician and was given a menu plan throughout my pregnancy based on my level of activity and health.

So if someone like me was able to bounce back easily without any exercise during my pregnancies there is even a bigger chance for you not to worry. The hardest part about me being pregnant was not able to exercise as I am a very active person. I am no avid gym goer but I love going for long walks and take pilates 2 times a week.

I suggest anyone who gets pregnant to see a dietician anyway. They can help with meal plans that could help reduce morning sickness, crampiness (bananas work wonders for those leg cramps!) cravings and other tidbits of annoyances whilst pregnant. Diet is definitely the most important factor in all of this as our hormones are all over the place but with a good meal plan to help stave off cravings can really help you not only be healthier for you and the baby but also help prevent you from going overboard with food and junk. I enjoyed a piece of cake or one or two small scoops of ice cream but that was it! My sister-in-law or other friends that were pregnant would have sometimes 4 pieces of cake or two bowls of ice cream in one sitting! Even they were able to lose the weight afterwards but did gain more weight than me whilst pregnant.

Pregnancy does change the body and do not think that you are going to come out of it like before you got pregnant. Its all in the genes and current lifestyle. I sometimes say look at our mothers but if your mother had many children (back to back) then that is not a good indicator for you. I had four children and lost my weight but ended up getting breast reduction afterwards because they kept getting larger after each child! I went from a D to an H and I breast fed all of my children. Now I have back problems as a result of having children. My babies rested on some nerves on my back and ever since then my back has never been the same. I know one lady that had continence issues and she had only one child. So yes pregnancy does change the body. But if it is the weight you are only concerned about, I would say don't worry about it. Keep with your lifestyle and you will be fine.

LegacyUser

A lot of women I know who lost their figures were because they were either eating for two (which you don't need to do) or were eating the wrong foods and weren't very active (which I know in some pregnancies can't be helped).

I knew a lucky young wan who was size 8 at end of pregnancy and back in her size 6-8s the day after she gave birth. She didn't get very big and just pinged back to her pre-preg self straight away.
She didn't change her lifestyle at all. She was always very active before and during pregnancy. She just carried on as normal.

xzanti

anonalol wrote: »

A lot of women I know who lost their figures were because they were either eating for two (which you don't need to do) or were eating the wrong foods and weren't very active (which I know in some pregnancies can't be helped).

I knew a lucky young wan who was size 8 at end of pregnancy and back in her size 6-8s the day after she gave birth. She didn't get very big and just pinged back to her pre-preg self straight away.
She didn't change her lifestyle at all. She was always very active before and during pregnancy. She just carried on as normal.

I know 2 girls like that (Sisters).. If you saw them from behind, at 9 months gone, you wouldn't even know they were pregnant, then they'd turn around and look like they had just stuffed a football up their tops :mad: grrrrrrrr

And of course never got any stretchmarks.. Some people are just blessed with great genes... :rolleyes:

EGAR

I was three days shy of my 38th birthday when I gave birth to my son. So not exactly a *young wan* and certainly NOT lacking in exercise due to my job. I did not lose all the weight and am 2 sizes bigger than I was before my pregnancy. I think it is a lot easier to lose weight when you are younger . I am not bothered as I am not fat/obese and still have the very active and quite stressful job whilst eating the same food I did before my pregnancy.

How Strange

Op I think your fears are very normal. I'm 5ft 2 and I really thought I'd never be the same again. It took a while but I'm now back to my pre pregnancy weight and my son is 17 months. I didn't get one stretch mark which I can't believe be ause my bump was huge at the end.

As long as you maintain a healthy diet and exercise throughout your pregnancy you'll be fine. I really believe in 9 months on, 9 months off so go easy on yourself for the first few months after childbirth as your body is still recovering but once you feel you've got your energy back you should be able to get back to your running etc.

It's true you won't have as much spare time but if you're motivated to keep it up you'll use your limited spare time wisely.

FizzleSticks

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