Where to go from here :/

LegacyUser

Hey guys in need of some advice sorry if its a long post

Im a 24 year old female and have been told by several people im good looking and have a great personality been seeing this lad on and off for 6 months who only came back to live in Ireland at christmas having spent the last 2 years in it

Everytime its going well he just gives up on us and comes out with the same pathetic excuse of how his head is messed up after an accident he was in a few years back and the whole moving back to ireland thing and says he doesnt want to have me go through it

He tells me delete his number and wants nothing got to do with me yet hes the one who rings and texts after nights out was always contacting me during his time in oz, and is always the one staring at me in the pub while im trying to move on with my life and meet other people yet theres something always there drawing me back to him he seems to have some sort of hold on me......How do i move on my friends and family and even his friends have told me im way too good for him and could do so much better so why cant i see this im sick of being treated like dirt

Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Elmidena

Your post is a little confusing so I'm sorry if I misunderstand you at all

It seems to me he either doesn't know what he wants, or he wants you but doesn't want to hurt you, and thus is unaware of how annoying/hurtful his hot and cold behaviour is. You need to grit your teeth and sever all contact if you want any hope of mental or romantic security because you're not going to get it from this guy by the looks of things! Easier said than done... it can be very difficult to break off something that's toxic for you regardless of how much you want to. It's part of human nature.

Pay no attention to him staring you out of it in the pub or phoning when he's drunk and feeling a bit nostalgic for you after a night on the lash. You deserve someone who appreciates you ALL of the time, not just when they think you're moving on or had one too many. Best of luck OP

fungun

ummm, take his advice. Delete his number. But also block it.

LegacyUser

Hey thanks for reading and sharing your advice sorry about the confusion just tried to keep the post short although you could write a book about the two of us ha..

Yeah the last time i had no contact with him for 6 weeks which basically i went off fb didnt go out the weekends or anything and he came crawling back saying it drove him crazy not knowing where i was or what i was doing.... I really dont knw what his deal is cos we only went official 3 weeks ago and told everyone about it so why the change of heart he even defended me to his ex gf and the whole time was saying to me im really happy and glad you gave me another chance

I just feel so betrayed and like a fool for letting this guy treat me like this i thought he cared about me but obviously not if he can hurt me all these times..What are the chances hel come back the last message i received was basically get lost and lose my number and i mean it!!!

spoofilyj

Its always tough to try and let a relationship slide when you had hopes of it going somewhere.

But if I were you I would try and forget about this guy, he sound like he is not emotionally mature enough to have a real relationship with you.

By the sounds of it you are repeatedly hurt by this behaviour so its time to call it quits.

You should surround yourself with only people who actually care about you and soon you will find your self in a much better place.

I'd recommend having a chat with someone you trust to work over whats bothering you, maybe a close friend or your mom or dad.
As the saying goes better out then in.
I know it hurts now but the sooner you move on the sooner you will feel better and hopefully find someone who truly values you and cares about your feelings.

Best of luck with it and chin up.