She constantly talks about others guys

LegacyUser

There's a girl I like in work, we're teammates and get on great

Our department went for drinks one Friday evening and the two of us spent most of the night chatting and took turns buying each other drinks.
I was back from a few days holidays in London and she used to live there so I was asking about areas and clubbing and stuff like that.
She spent aaaaaaages talking about guys in London or Dublin who approached her in bars and clubs. Few name drops like someone in a boy band. Not exes, just guys on nights out.
Very pretty and striking girl, I've no reason to doubt it.

Anyway she asked me to lunch the next week. I tell ya, it's not often a girl asks me!!

Again had a great laugh and craic and again with this talking about guys in the past?? I don't realy say anything
Hey these are good looking guys, the kind you see in papers.
Once again I'll say these are not ex-boyfriends, just who she claims approach her on nights out.

Went out another night for the company BBQ and I was with some of the lads most of the night and I was heading home for an early night both she and her friend stopped me on my way out and brought me to the bar for shots, insisted I stay. Right so.
Then a gang us of went to a pub.

And then I walked with this girl to the nightclub but I got stopped by the bouncer over my shoes. Oh well, it happens, silly mistake but I hadn't planned on going out the whole night so fair enough, I wasn't well dressed.
She was staying in town with a friend and I just headed home

I realy like this girl, plan to ask her out.
One of the other girls in work goes around saying what a lovely couple we would be. Hmmm, I'm not there to fuel to office gossip but I realy do like her


What does it mean for a girl to be telling a lad about all these attractive guys who've approached her in the past?
Is this some mind game?
Is this her showing how she is attractive and people see this?
I'm no male model or someone you see in Take That, just an average guy

I'm not the most experienced, I don't know at all
What's going on?

P. Breathnach

I'd guess that she is trying to boost her own ego or image. Possibly because of insecurity, possibly vanity. If her appearance is her main asset (in her own eyes) then she might be trying to big it up by letting you know that other men are stuck by her looks.

Unless she is a total airhead, this pattern should not persist beyond the point where is is trying to impress you. If something gets going between you, she no longer needs to impress you in the "shop window" way; if nothing much develops, she will no longer have the incentive to show off.

If my interpretation is correct, then it is harmless stuff - just a minor bit of silliness that will cease.

fungun

if they are not exes then its just name-dropping really, emphasising that people find her attrractive. She is probably just doing this because she is insecure (often really goodlooking peole are the most insecure!).

Would expect a normal well adjusted person to mention it, but not to keep mentioning it or going on about it. Its possible she is doing this to try to emphasise to you how goodlooking she is - does she have the same conversation with others or only in 1-1 with you?

December2012

Or maybe she thinks they are just funny anecdotes that will show how her in a good light.

Don't over analyse things. Go out and enjoy it.

Fizzlesque

It sounds to me like she sees you as a friend, not a potential romantic partner, and is chatting to you the way she would a friend she feels very comfortable to chat to.

Richy06

Sounds like the friend zone to me.

LegacyUser

Has she actually shown any signs that she's interested in you or attracted to you? From what you've written it doesn't sound like she has.

So maybe she has picked up on the fact you are attracted to her and possibily letting you know the type of guys she is interested in and attracted to, and you might not match her 'type', and she's trying not to be so direct about it but hoping you will figure it out. It's possible your work colleagues have also been saying similar to her about you making a good couple but that can happen. People like to stir things up albeit with good intentions and maybe it's her way of putting things straight without trying to be too blunt about, but it doesn't sound like she's leading you on.

LegacyUser

OP here, thank you for replies

Yes the friendzone is very real possibility.
I may be just someone to have a laugh with, head to lunch with and no more



As for her type, well if that's the extremely good looking and stylish male model types that's just not me.
Only an average guy who is easy going and up for a laugh
I'm no Jonathan Rhys Meyers!


Sure I'll bite the bullet and ask her out for something during the week, comedy club maybe and see how it goes.
If it goes nowhere then so be it and I'll be cool over it, we do have to work with each other after all

thanks again for replies

Piliger

I honestly thing this is just nerves. But you need to learn to speak up OP. When something irritates or bugs us we MUST say it straight away and not hod it back to create unnecessary stress and uncertainty later. It's not worth it.

Too many guys and girls shy away because a) as Irish people we hesitate to tackle awkward moments or b) the guy/girl is hot and we don't want to lose the chance But it actually is a false hope. It may move us farther down the line but it only messes things up later.

Go after this girl, but when she start on about guys again just say "give it a rest love" in a nice way. This tells her how you feel, and also tests the real reason for her bad habit. You will know the truth of the situation pretty fast. And that is what you need to know.

Communicate and speak up....

Best of luck.