Taking a friend to visit an escort - slight guilt

LegacyUser

Basically, a guy I've been working with for the last two years.
He's from east europe, and he came here with a friend at the time, but his friend has since gone back and this bloke has had a little difficultly meeting new people and so forth.

Basically, he hasn't had any sexual contact for quite the while (entirely heterosexual, just to eliminate any confusion).

We went for a beer a couple days ago and we were talking about all these things.

Personally, I visit escorts and escort like services regularly.
Basically, I threw the idea out there, just to let the guy know that, you know, he's better not suffering in silence.
If life is being a little tough on him in this sense at the moment, you know, there's a way around it.

Initially, he basically dismissed the idea.
But then we were talking about other topics, and he'd bring it back up and so on like this.

I basically told him about the different things and what goes on and by the time we parted I could tell he basically had his mind set on it.

Only thing is, now I'm thinking that maybe I've corrupted the guy or something.
I mean, for me personally, I know what I'm doing and I've got my head screwed on, but this guy can be a little volatile sometimes (at one work location he once called the manager a "mother****er" cause he clocked his hours wrong or something).

Anyways, basically we get paid on Thursday and I agreed we'd go together to some joint and basically chill out and we'd get with a couple of women.

Again, it's probably not a big deal.

But, in the back of my mind I'm just like, you know, I know some people are quite sensitive to this type of thing and I just hope I'm not tampering with the guys, I dunno, moral foundations or something??

Is it really such a bad thing?
He's not in such a good place right now. He's in a foreign country with little to no close friends and he's the type of guy that has a little surface difficulty with socializing, though I know he's actually a really good guy, albeit, as I said, a little volatile.
I just figure a visit to an escort will cheer him up a little and maybe even be good for him in some ways, no?

LegacyUser

He's a big boy and responsible for himself. Honestly, it's probably better he goes with someone who knows how it works here than just try and find an escort himself.

Also, god knows, but the girls might more likely be from his country.

Dravokivich

I recon it'd be something you'd need to discuss with him in a sober environment, away from dutch courage.

I wouldn't be too concerned with the comment you mentioned aimed at a manager, unless you are afraid he may end up feeling hard done by, or ehm... unsatisfied after being with an escort and it doesn't meet his expectations.

Have you ever had any previous cause for concern about his attitude towards women?

neuro-praxis

I'd be more concerned about your own lack of moral decency tbh, before I'd be too worried about your friend's.

Mickey Dazzler

Sounds like you did the guy a favour to me. Fair play to you.

LegacyUser

Dravokivich wrote: »

I recon it'd be something you'd need to discuss with him in a sober environment, away from dutch courage.

I wouldn't be too concerned with the comment you mentioned aimed at a manager, unless you are afraid he may end up feeling hard done by, or ehm... unsatisfied after being with an escort and it doesn't meet his expectations.

Have you ever had any previous cause for concern about his attitude towards women?

Oh, we weren't the least bit drunk or anything.

Yeah, you see, that might be a problem.
The guy works long and hard and we don't get paid too great.

I've explained that side of things to him pretty clearly though - sometimes they don't live up to expectations or it might not be perfect etc - so I dunno, maybe that will be okay.

No, no real concern with his attitude with women, apart from being a little naive at times.

You know, I always see he gets on with people at a certain level, but as I said, he has difficulty establishing relationships beyond a grass roots level.
To try and surmise, he's the kind of guy that although friendly and fun, good talker with a good sense of humor, he can be a little difficult as well.

I appreciate the comment as regards my helping him out, cause that's genuinely what I'm aiming to do.

Maybe it's just a neurotic concern in a sense; I mean, what's the big deal really?
Maybe a couple of encounters with an escort might bring out a more confident side to him and suddenly he'll be out meeting regular people and what not, right?

I just want to clarify, I meet regular girls too.
It's just I find that from time to time, reasonably priced escorts where we have agreed to what we can and can not do beforehand can take a lot of hassle and effort out of the social complexities we must go through oftentimes when meeting new people.