Why haven't any MMA stars entered the Kumite?

jayteecork

I was watching Bloodsport starring Jean Claude Van Damage, which is the true story of legendary fighter, Frank Dux.

There is a no-holds barred freestyle tournament called the Kumite held in Hong Kong every year.

Judging by the film it is mostly stand-up with most fighters showing little to no grappling skills.

I think any half-decent MMA fighter could easily win the Kumite by taking the fight to the mat and winning by GNP or a submission (Matte)

I'm definitely thinking about the likes of Nick Diaz who'd surely like for the Kumite trophy to be back with him in Stockton.

(Edit: meant this for MMA forum, mods could you transfer please??!!)

Clive

MMA fighters simply have no defence to dim mak. Once they ran into someone representing the Tanaka clan, they would crumble like a bottom brick.

SDTimeout

Those who would like to enter it are too busy preparing for the King of Iron Fist tournament.

cowzerp

jayteecork wrote: »

which is the true story of legendary fighter, Frank Dux.

I'm pretty sure Dux was shown to be a charlatain.

jayteecork

cowzerp wrote: »

I'm pretty sure Dux was shown to be a charlatain.

Charlatan? How dare you call Frank a charlatan.

He knows the Tiger Claw!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdZlI_enhNk

Barry.Oglesby

Clive wrote: »

MMA fighters simply have no defence to dim mak. Once they ran into someone representing the Tanaka clan, they would crumble like a bottom brick.

Bricks don't hit back.

muckwarrior

Barry.Oglesby wrote: »

Bricks don't hit back.

According to Newton's third law of motion they do!

Mellor

jayteecork wrote: »

I was watching Bloodsport starring Jean Claude Van Damage, which is the true story of legendary fighter, Frank Dux.

Frank Dux truely is legendary.

Frank Dux was a spy and a master of Ninjitsu, which is just a Japanese word for somersaulting megaspy. He was the best. He trained under a shidoshi whose name was only coincidentally the name of a James Bond villain. He was in a covert branch of the military so secret that even our military didn't know about him. He didn't exist so hard that birds **** right through him. But someone did know about him: a shadowy society of martial artists who run a tournament called The Kumite. They invited Frank to enter, and that was their last mistake.
From 1975 to 1980, he was the undefeated Full Contact Kumite World Heavy Weight Champion. He had 56 consecutive knockouts in one tournament, a number too stupid to be fake. He set four world records in the same tournament including Fastest Recorded Kick with Knockout: 72 miles-per-hour. The Kumite Athletic Commission figured it was OK to keep radar guns pointed at the fighters at all times since Frank removed most of their gonads before the long term effects of radar exposure could manifest. In fact, Frank Dux punched so many dicks through their sacred walls that city temple inspectors shut them down for code violations.
Suspiciously, the organization that held the Kumite seemed to share a home address with Frank Dux, and the trophy they gave him was the same trophy that he suspiciously paid for himself. Think about that: The Kumite is so secret that the only paper trail leads to Frank Dux, professional secret agent. That means that the other fighters, while obviously not very good at fighting, are unbelievably good at being secret. Why, if Frank Dux hadn't written a book about them and bought himself that trophy, I doubt I'd have even believed they existed.
In 1988, Frank's extremely true story was made into the film Bloodsport which is still Jean-Claude Van Damme's best movie. Dux worked on the film as the fighting coordinator where he taught Van Damme how to properly get punched in the face for several minutes and then win by spin kick. Jean-Claude would go on to use these fighting techniques exclusively for two decades.
Years later, Dux and Van Damme worked together on the story of The Quest. It was a film like Bloodsport only with Bloodsport elements. Dux took Van Damme to court because he was apparently promised a huge gross revenue deal for his "Story By" credit. In the film industry, this type of arrangement is almost as common as an actual ninja spy holding a trophy for Best Ninja Spy. To see both of these things in the same place would be like finding a human vagina on your unicorn. Literally ****ing incredible.
Frank Dux never managed to produce evidence of this amazing agreement since the documents were in a box that was destroyed by a fire. Fitting in perfectly with his life of the fantastic, this fire was a magical fire that destroyed document boxes and nothing else. It sounds ridiculous now, but imagine you were a judge residing over a case between the cocaine-filled star of Double Impact and an actual, real-life superninja who controls fire. That judge said exactly what you would say: "Pay the man, Timecop."


http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-fighters-who-lied-their-way-to-legendary/