cliche

LegacyUser

I know this is very cliched but I honestly cant find the right man.its wave after wave of men I dont get on with,men that are taken or the usual which is, I like you but I'm not ready for a relationship so let me use you for sex and make you feel like crap
I know the last one shouldnt happen but sometimes I get lonely and fall into that stupid trap.The latest guy, I met him off a DATING site was this.We met up,he was lovely, met up again,had a great time and from then he went all quiet, I asked what was up, he said he liked me but wasnt ready for dating someone.Why are you on a dating site so?! STUPIDLY, cuz i like him and have a connection with him, I went along with it for a few days but couldnt anymore.I was feeling down about it most of the time.
I just want to find someone decent who I like for ME and not just for a quick ride. Am i the only one this happens to??I probably am the only dope to let this happen to them. My confidence aint too high at the mo(not that its ever rocketing high) but I just feel defeated by it all and I dont even know what im asking on here to be honest.

Ickle Magoo

Hope you get some good advice here OP - tho posters are requested to read the charter with regards to making generalisations or flaming before posting.

All the very best.

hattoncracker

There's nothing wrong with you....


It happens to all of us at one time or another... It took me years and many false starts... But try not to give up hope... Take a break, focus on loving yourself and healing from all these assholes, and I guarantee you you'll have better luck..

LegacyUser

OP, don't give up. Love will find you. I am on dating web site too. you would meet a lot of crap there. But there are also nice people there. By meeting different people, you would gradually know your own stand, know what you want, know what you can't take, and one day love will find you. Just keep trying. Learn from every trial and error.

sammye333

like hatton cracker, i agree that there is nothing wrong with you.

You seem like that you are really ready for a serious relationship. One thought i had from reading your post is,the guys you are dating could be picking up on this and that might be putting them off. I could be wrong? If the word "relationship" is mentioned early on by either the man or the woman, then it can scare off the other person.

You said that the last guy you met up with seemed keen but then you didnt hear from him. This does happen when dating people and you will not get on with everyone.

Hopefully things will work out for you

sammy

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies. I had a good chat with one of my friends today and I feel better about things. I didnt mention the word 'relationship' at all but because I act nice or whatever, it could be perceived as being too eager?! All I'm doing is trying to be myself but for some reason it's taken up as something else. Think its time for me to have a little time out and make me feel happier within myself before I go looking for anyone else

Irish_Elect_Eng

Ok here is a simplistic, but true answer.

"Madness is continuing to do the same things and expecting a different result"
-Einstein (I think)

If you feel that you have established a negative pattern that is not making you happy, only one person can help you.....and that would be you...

Examine the pattern of previous failed relationships....perhaps share your thoughts with a trusted friend...see if you can see if there is a mode of behavior that is negatively affecting the outcome of your relationships and change it....

I believe that the right person does not just come along like a random event....I think what happens is that we are constantly changing ourselves based on our needs and experiences and eventually we arrive at a place where we are ready to fall in love and have a relationship..at that point we are prepared to have a serious relationship with the next person that we are attracted to...

Make a change...move on...live life and you will get there....

Sleepy

Stop trying to find the man and start working on being the woman you want to be. That's when you find someone tbh.