Wedding Present Question?

jajjay

We have not been at a Wedding in a number of years. A lady that works with me has asked us to her big day.

I have heard that they would prefer cash as they have their own house and have been in it a number of years.

How much should we put in the card?

I also have two of my own sisters getting married this year aswell - does anyone know whats the appropriate €€€ gift for these occasions??

Thanks and your valued views would be appreciated

JAJJAY

Killed By Death

It really depends on your means but I would say €100 is plenty from a working couple. But if you haven't got that much €70 or €50 is acceptable too.

The Lovely Muffin

Give what you can afford.

Things are tight for everyone so I'm sure any monetary give regardless of how little or how much, would be very much appreciated by the couple's.

unreggd

Agreed, money in a card is the best gift IMO, and should be greatly appreciated

The couple will be smashed after the wedding, and most people STILL buy appliance / crystal gifts. Baffled

jimmycrackcorm

I would go on the basis of a quid pro quo on what it would cost to gave you attend their wedding, I.e the cost of the meal for you both plus entertainment. That would suggest to me something around €80 - €100 or similar to a night out to dinner plus going to see a band.

ncmc

I personally would give €150 as a couple going to a wedding. But my sister got married lately and she got plenty of €100 presents from couples and she was more than happy to receive that much. I would give more for a sibling, maybe €200-300. It's very hard for other people to advice you, money is tight for people and I think expectations of gifts have adjusted accordingly. I think most couples getting married are very conscious of the cost involved in their guests attending their wedding, dress, suit, hotel room, maybe taking a day off work, I think they will be happy with whatever you give them.

Definitely go with the cash option, people just don’t have the space for all the gifts they get and if they’ve lived together for years, it’ll be more than likely to be duplicates of stuff they have already.

solerina

Whatever you can afford....anyone who has a problem with gifts they receive arnt worth the hassle, I have always given 150 whether going alone or as part of a couple (i usually put a bit aside every week for the 5/6 weeks before)

The_Conductor

I'd be far more inclined to give siblings significantly more than I would someone from work- but it all depends on your circumstances- and indeed the circumstances of those you are giving the gift to.

samina

Just wondering would the gift amount be the same for an evening only invite?

The_Conductor

samina wrote: »

Just wondering would the gift amount be the same for an evening only invite?

100% definitely not. If you're relegated to an evening only invite- no-one could expect you to pony up for a top notch wedding present. Of course its still subjective- how close are you to the people, is there a reason you're only on the evening invite list etc.

Sleepy

We'd usually give €150 as a couple but would certainly give more to a sibling. Neither of my siblings have gotten married yet but I think I'd be more inclined to get them some sort of present but I'd make sure it was something they wanted / needed e.g. pay for the honeymoon, the wedding car or something like that (obv. depending on what I could afford).

tannytantans

I got married last year and work colleagues and friends mainly gave s 150 and family/closer friends gave anything from 200-300.

Sundew

samina wrote: »

Just wondering would the gift amount be the same for an evening only invite?

Possibly stingy but we are struggling at the moment like everybodyelse and just gave €30 to a family member who only bothered to give us an evening invite to their do. We didn't go....If you are going then I'd advise more then €30
I hasten to add I have been more then generous for 3 previous weddings I have attended €100+ cash/voucher gifts but didn't even get so much as a thank you card so I hope you know the person very well and that they have the decency to thank you for your gift because you will certainly feel like a mug if you are more then generous :mad:

samina

Sundew wrote: »

samina wrote: »

Just wondering would the gift amount be the same for an evening only invite?

Possibly stingy but we are struggling at the moment like everybodyelse and just gave €30 to a family member who only bothered to give us an evening invite to their do. We didn't go....If you are going then I'd advise more then €30
I hasten to add I have been more then generous for 3 previous weddings I have attended €100+ cash/voucher gifts but didn't even get so much as a thank you card so I hope you know the person very well and that they have the decency to thank you for your gift because you will certainly feel like a mug if you are more then generous :mad:

Hmm 30 euro sounds about what I can afford to give. Is that really mean? It's a casual friends family, we used to be neighbours so not particularly close.

ncmc

samina wrote: »

Hmm 30 euro sounds about what I can afford to give. Is that really mean? It's a casual friends family, we used to be neighbours so not particularly close.

I’m really not a fan of evening invites. It’s like “we like you, but not enough to have you at our wedding or feed you”! If you are only invited to the evening, then chances are, you don’t know the couple that well, and they more than likely aren’t expecting much of a gift from you. The way I would look at it, you are not costing them as much as a day guest (you aren’t costing them dinner or wine). If as a couple we were invited to the evening part, I would give €50 or a small gift, so for one person, I think €30 is loads.

Lisha

samina wrote: »

Hmm 30 euro sounds about what I can afford to give. Is that really mean? It's a casual friends family, we used to be neighbours so not particularly close.

We did not expect gifts from those who attended the afters of our wedding. (this was in 2005)
Some did give presents, they would have been inexpensive gifts like a photo frame and we were delighted with them. Some gave lotto tickets. I would have been morto if an evening invite gave a major present.
Buy a gifts like picture frame if you dont want to put a value on it.
Or buy a pair of mugs with their names on them.
In this day and age people are just thrilled if anyone gives a present TBF. No one expects too much and if they do that is another story.

ibarelycare

A picture frame is a great idea. You can get beautiful frames for €30. The bride and groom won't know how much it cost, and you don't have to feel "mean" as you said for "only" giving €30

Sleepy

TBH, while a picture frame would be fine as a present for an afters, it's done to death as a wedding gift. There's only so many pictures you can put up in your house.

For an afters invite I'd be more inclined to give a bottle of something I know the couple like e.g. a good bottle of aged whisky, good bottle of champagne or if going with a frame, it'd be framing a good photograph of them I'd managed to take in the past.

Snoopy1

This drives me so mad. There should be no set limit, give what you can afford. And people who say, you should cover the cost of the meal etc, grow up. They invited you to the wedding, and yet you feel you should cover the cost. If they cant afford to feed you, then they shouldnt invite you.
I actually like the idea of a nice photo frame, it shows some thought went into the gift, and weddings are not about making as much money as you can out of the guests.

Sleepy

Snoopy1 wrote: »

I actually like the idea of a nice photo frame, it shows some thought went into the gift, and weddings are not about making as much money as you can out of the guests.

Of course they're not. However a photo frame is such an unoriginal gift I'd say it shows you put about 30 seconds of thought into it...

blondie29

Personally if going to full day of wedding as couple we give €150 more if very close friends. For evening €50 or nice present for that amount or under is plenty.

However my two bro's got married in last year and half and my Sis a few years ago. We gave them all €500 but it's wotever you can afford. we're both working so i can imagine thats a big chunk if money is tight. I know they really appreciated the cash starting out their lives together and it was put to good use where they needed it.

Balmed Out

Depends on the norms within your circle and what you can affoard. Me and my friends its always 200 per couple or a gift of 30 - 50 for an evening invite. However there have been times that someones broke and they might only be able to spend 20 on a small gift.
From the couples point of view its great to get some cash in to off-set some of the cost of a wedding but the main point is to celebrate the day with everyone and your attendance is more important then a gift

sheindlin

jajjay wrote: »

We have not been at a Wedding in a number of years. A lady that works with me has asked us to her big day.

I have heard that they would prefer cash as they have their own house and have been in it a number of years.

How much should we put in the card?

I also have two of my own sisters getting married this year aswell - does anyone know whats the appropriate €€€ gift for these occasions??

Thanks and your valued views would be appreciated

JAJJAY

Is there any possibility you could give collectively as workmates rather than individually? Just an idea.