Work is a nightmare

LegacyUser

My work environment is a nightmare. I'm here a good few years now and have hated all of it. The worst part isn't even the work environment, it's that I didn't just leave when the alarm bells rang and still haven't left!

The company is successful enough, the pay is good and the priviledges too so I'm lucky to have that, but I'm also perpetually sidelined by my teammates who are here for years and years and not interested in doing anything but the same old slog they've been doing. I have tried to bring about changed on that front. Not by being a blowhard and shouting "You're doing it wrong" but by showing them cool stuff, talking about new ideas and implementing them and making suggestions that wouldn't bruise egos. I am still much less experienced than them and there's a lot I don't know, but there's a lot I do know too that could improve our workflow.

My boss gives out to me for being too quiet and not asking for help, but when I do, I don't get it. No one checks the spec I do for my work, or the work afterwards. My boss contanstly claims something I'm working on needs to be sorted and it's holding up other projects. It's not. He makes a song and dance about the money he's spent on a project that failed. I implemented the project but it failed because of my boss' misinterpretations of the commercial aspects - things I made him aware of but he got offended about.

If I have problems and ask for help off my teammates I get "dunno..." but if they are having problems, it's all you hear about to the point of it being disruptive! I help them to shut them up, the problems I'm helping them with... They really should know how to fix them at this stage. They take credit for them so often without mentioning me, that I have to slyly let mangement know that I was involved, not them.

I come into work and put on a happy face and try to be myself. I engage my colleagues in conversation and remember things they say and ask them how their weekend went and all that, but I get ignored. I came in this morning and when I did, the conversation stopped dead when I walked into the room.

I've broken up with my girlfriend recently, lost touch with all my friends and have no one to talk to apart from a councellor I've been seeing for the past few weeks. I've lost count of how many times I've got half way to work and thought about turning back again. The Sunday fear is a real thing in my life, sitting at my desk being ignored due to cliques and politics is destroying me too, because the industry I work in is something I really want to stick with.

Danniboo

I know things are tough but you sound bright, ambitious, positive, initelligent and creative. Plenty of employers looking for that. With the way things are one of the many tools in an employee that can help is innovation and creativity. Get looking for a new job I say. We can all sit here and say the recession, things are crap, i'm lucky to have a job, nows not a good time to change, but recession or not we only have one life and should try to make the most of it.

tommyboy2222

Leave and get a better paid job.

woodchuck

Are you looking for a new job? If you're unhappy you should. I'm not saying you should leave the one you're in, but it can't hurt to look around at the same time. You might end up finding something much better.

Defiler Of The Coffin

It sounds like you work in IT. If so then moving jobs is the way to get more experience and better pay, regardless of how your workplace experience is at the moment.

If not then it's a no-brainer to change jobs anyhow.

Why did you lose touch with all your friends?

LegacyUser

Thanks all for the replies.

I appreciate the kind words, Danniboo!

To respond, I haven't been looking for new jobs for stupid reasons. I know I need to just kick myself up the backside! I guess I'm afraid that I'll end up in a similar place, or that my skills have suffered because of where I am and I'll struggle if I move. All irrational fears!

Defiler of Of The Coffin, yeah I'm in IT. I've lost contact with my friends for the usual reasons. You hit your 30s and people grow apart and move on.

I should've been more proactive about meeting new people, but I'm terrible at making friends! I just constantly have the fear of being myself! It's so weird too, because I don't have this problem when it comes to work!

Defiler Of The Coffin

Work is a nightmare wrote: »

Thanks all for the replies.

I appreciate the kind words, Danniboo!

To respond, I haven't been looking for new jobs for stupid reasons. I know I need to just kick myself up the backside! I guess I'm afraid that I'll end up in a similar place, or that my skills have suffered because of where I am and I'll struggle if I move. All irrational fears!

Defiler of Of The Coffin, yeah I'm in IT. I've lost contact with my friends for the usual reasons. You hit your 30s and people grow apart and move on.

I should've been more proactive about meeting new people, but I'm terrible at making friends! I just constantly have the fear of being myself! It's so weird too, because I don't have this problem when it comes to work!

Look at the positives man. You work in an industry that is crying out for workers. It's a good idea to ring up a few recruiters and see what skills are in demand at the moment. You'd be surprised at what some companies are looking for and the salaries they are willing to pay. You mightn't have all the skills a company want but there is nothing to stop you skilling up in your spare time. Don't delay any longer man, there are great opportunities out there, you just need to shake yourself out of your inertia and put yourself out there.

You're not going to change your workmates or the corporate culture. It wouldn't be worth the hassle, doesn't sound like there's much potential there anyhow. As soon as you step into a new workplace with friendlier more open-minded people you will quickly forget about the old place!

Ah we all grow apart from some of our friends at some stage, would you consider taking up a new sport or joining a club of some sort? You need an outlet besides work as well.

Best of luck!

jimmycrackcorm

Just to reiterate the point that in IT at least, changing jobs can be a fantastic solution for this type of problem.

Wompa1

Work is a nightmare wrote: »

Thanks all for the replies.

I appreciate the kind words, Danniboo!

To respond, I haven't been looking for new jobs for stupid reasons. I know I need to just kick myself up the backside! I guess I'm afraid that I'll end up in a similar place, or that my skills have suffered because of where I am and I'll struggle if I move. All irrational fears!

Defiler of Of The Coffin, yeah I'm in IT. I've lost contact with my friends for the usual reasons. You hit your 30s and people grow apart and move on.

I should've been more proactive about meeting new people, but I'm terrible at making friends! I just constantly have the fear of being myself! It's so weird too, because I don't have this problem when it comes to work!

I was in a similar situation in an IT job back in Ireland. It seems like in Ireland a lot of people in their 30's and 40's got into IT because their secondary school Guidance consellors told them it was good for jobs back during the original boom. So people who have no interest and no aptitude for technical IT work are the one's that are senior in Irish IT jobs. Which sucks for the younger people just getting into it over the last 8 or 9 years.

What I ended up doing was starting my own IT blog. And did a cert and am still trying to do some other certification exams. I also converted my old Desktop into a server and went through the setups of a bunch of new technologies with trial versions or VLK versions. When I felt comfortable with the product I'd blog about it and add it to my CV. Citrix and Microsoft certs are a good idea also. If you want any details on learning anything, let me know. I'll try and help you out.