im abit confused about being single

LegacyUser

hi me and my boyfriend broke up few days ago , he told me he cheated on me a year ago we were with each other for two years, so now were on a break i need space but this is since he told me that i feel like i don't love him anymore trust is gone and im actually feel so happy i have me time, i have met few people out in clubs .

I feel guilty for enjoying myself and having him asking me back and not to meet other people but i just don't want him anymore i mean i miss him and feel sorry for him now because he keeps saying sorry and trying to make me guilty but i know the relationship is well and truely over but i still love him as a friend

NoobSaibot5

by the sounds of it your current headspace doesn't want advice, I'd say deep down you already know what you want and it's just the case of people encouraging what you feel you should do. I've been there before in regards to matters of the heart.

From a logical perspective, I wouldn't go back to him. You said the relationship is over, and you feeling guilt wont revive the dead. I'd get on with your own life. Maybe having someone walk away from him for good after an affair will teach him not to do it again.

Idle Passerby

If you no longer trust him and want to be single cut the cord with him and break up fully. Of course you'll miss him sometimes but it sounds like you've already decided the relationship is over.

P. Breathnach

I think you are asking if you are entitled to feel the way you do, and if you should feel no guilt for deciding it's over. That's very simple: you have nothing to feel guilty about.

Yes, it's okay to feel sorry for your ex. But that's not a reason to get back with him.

ElleEm

I agree with Idle.

Usually a break is to allow people to figure out what they want. You seem to have come to your decision so break up with him now and get on with your life!

SunnyDub1

Hi Op,

I was in a similar situation myself before.

it's natural to feel guilty but sometimes we can't help how we feel. You're not doing anything wrong, you are been honest with yourself and him.
Your only feeling guilty cause unfortunately you where the one that had to end it and be honest with yourself.

It's always hard for both parties when a relationship falls apart no matter where it went wrong and how it wrong wrong, and who decided to finish it.
He will eventually get over it, while it's hard now for both you and him it will get easier and the guilt and worry will fade.

You sound like you know what you want so you are doing the right thing. Stick to how you feel and don't do anything to please other people.

Ickle Magoo

I think all that's left to do is end the relationship OP. Love is conditional and we all have our boundaries regarding what we'll accept and what will ultimately destroy our relationships...I don't think you have anything to feel guilty about, your partners actions have resulted in your feelings changing and that's something he's just going to have to live with.

It could well be that you weren't really happy in the relationship and things were going that way anyway and this has just acted as a catalyst - either way, I don't think pretending you want to be in the relationship when you are clearly happy to be single is an option so I don't see you have much alternative, it's just a matter of when and how.

All the very best. :cool:

LegacyUser

hi thanks for the advice have been thinking about it myself , Im just trying to ignore him for the time being sounds mean but its better then leaving him think there is hope there and etc... thank you for the support i feel like my life is finally coming together