Where to host "day after" party

Gatica

I would love to have a second day after the wedding, where we'd get to hang out with our friends and see some of the overseas family.
We're getting married on a Friday (thanks to the HSE civil rules) and think that many people would likely still be free on the Saturday night. Ideally would have loved to stay on at the hotel and have a BBQ/Buffet there with outdoors activities. However, we'd have to have a minimum number of bedrooms booked - the rooms are expensive and we don't think they'd get booked, also we wouldn't expect friends/family to fork out that much for a second night, nor would we be able to afford to help them out ourselves.
So... it's too expensive for all concerned to host it at the hotel where we are getting married, so where should we host it?

Our first idea was to have it at home or at the parents' house. Upside - no fees, control over the "environment", more personal and informal; downside - hassle of bringing in caterers, cost of providing drinks, could be too crowded, requires cleaning up before/after.
The other thing that I considered was cordoning off an area at a hotel bar/lounge and getting some finger food. Upside - the mess is not at home!, people can buy own drinks; downside - impersonal, requires more accurate approximate numbers, could be too empty or too crowded. Most hotels recommended using a function room rather than bar/lounge area due to the large numbers (I said about 80 people). I worry it could end up flat/boring/without a buzz if it's separate from a main bar, as we don't wanna spend more on a DJ or anything like that, or having to decorate again.
Next decision/question is who do we invite?
Our main wedding number are looking roughly 130. I thought that maybe not everyone will be able to stay on, so I think maybe ~90 would stick around. However, my OH is a very social type and would love to invite the people who didn't get to come to the wedding itself (we're not planning on having ppl for an evening/afters), extended friends/acquaintances, parents' neighbours, etc... this is obviously more easily done if it's at home, but the numbers could get really large then. Does this make it then into an all-day affair, so as to spread out the numbers? Or is evening-time still most convenient...?

stinkle

Gatica wrote: »

I worry it could end up flat/boring/without a buzz if it's separate from a main bar, as we don't wanna spend more on a DJ or anything like that, or having to decorate again.

Hi, with respect to this, you could set up an iPod or a laptop quite easily in a function room if you're allowed. I was at a day-after party last year, it was in a room above a pub. In fairness the bride's sister sorted it cos she worked there, but we had an iPod in the background and could chat away cos it wasnt stupidly loud either. Some of the guests were very musical so there were a couple of guitars too - maybe you could ask a guest to perform for an hour or something?

I loved the party we were at, it was very laid back after the big celebrations the night before, and people were a bit more relaxed, esp those in the bridal party and immediate family. it's a really good idea. We're having a friday wedding too and are thinking of potential saturday entertainment too, but of course without extra stress or expense!

sweetie

Personally, if I wasn't invited to a wedding and then asked to an after-wedding party I wouldn't go. We had a barbeque after our saturday wedding and out of 140 guest about half were asked and then only about half again turned up and it was a little disappointing but we understood due to it being a sunday etc. I would have it at my parents home if I were to do it again.

Gatica

It did cross my mind some people may be offended at only being invited to an after-event. However, we'd a few people that self-invited to the evening, which we're not even having. Thought it would be a chance to see them and show them we'd not forgotten them. Also, when it comes to parents' friends, we're not inviting them because we're not having a massive wedding and we're paying for it ourselves. If they did want the chance to congratulate us, I think this would be a good way to do it (not cos I think we're so important, just some neighbours etc... love that kind of thing).

I think an mp3-player over speakers or some musical volunteers sounds like a great idea.