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Lack of communication

  • 26-03-2012 1:31am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    So Im going out with a girl a month and a week now , first relationship of my 20s , shes 19 so a few years younger. So the first 2 and a bit weeks were perfect, she came over most days , both me inviting her , and her inviting herself, she met my friends, i met hers. Sex was a daily occurence 3-4 days a week and conversatiin was fine.

    Then it just seemed to rapidly go downhill. I would have to text to get any communication from her, she wont come out now and just wont tell me anything . The weird part is that shes really close with my male friend and will tell him anything. Even things that she doesnt tell me about herself / what she likes , dislikes etc... things that arent too personal and youd think a boyfriend wouldnt mind knowing.

    I dont know what the problem is, ive told her she can tell me anything , asked if she was annoyed and said no.

    Any clues for me boardsies ?


Comments

  • #2
    ElleEm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,981 ✭✭✭ElleEm


    Well you've been with her five weeks and she seems to be pulling away from you.
    It sounds like she is not that into you (to steal the book's phrase!).
    It is especially strange that she is closer to one of your mates than she is you.
    You should talk to her and see if she wants to continue on with the relationship.

    You should be in the "honeymoon" phase now, but she clearly isn't.


  • #3
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    It's not that unusual that she'd tell him more than you - has she known him longer?

    She's young so probably is quite naive.


  • #4
    ibarelycare
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 58,456 ✭✭✭✭ibarelycare


    Did she only meet your friend when you and her started going out? Sounds like she realised that she likes him more than you and that's why she's pulling away from you and getting closer to him.


  • #5
    msg11
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,572 ✭✭✭msg11


    Sounds like she needs to cop herself on and stop messing you around. As someone else said ask her if she want to be in a relationship or not.


  • #6
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    OP here again , yes shes only known this friend the same length as me. he has a girlfriend and ive no worries about anything going on.

    I tried not texting her for the last 2 days just to see would she make the effort, still nothing. Even when i do text her I just get 1-2 word answers , i asked her was there a problem or is something at her an she says no that its all fine.

    Im getting really annoyed with her now as I dont know what the deal is with her


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  • #7
    musicinyou
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 90 ✭✭musicinyou


    Anyclueslads wrote: »
    OP here again , yes shes only known this friend the same length as me. he has a girlfriend and ive no worries about anything going on.

    I tried not texting her for the last 2 days just to see would she make the effort, still nothing. Even when i do text her I just get 1-2 word answers , i asked her was there a problem or is something at her an she says no that its all fine.

    Im getting really annoyed with her now as I dont know what the deal is with her


    blow her out of the water lad! dont waste anymore of your time! shes lost the flame and doesnt seem to have the decency to tell you! na id be sacking her straight away, and without word, onwards and upwards


  • #8
    Herrick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 903 ✭✭✭Herrick


    OP your relationship is over. She's either just not into you anymore or maybe testing the waters with someone else while keeping a hold of you, but that's a stretch.

    It just sounds like she hasn't the guts to end it. Tbh honest if I were you, I'd have gotten rid of her after the first few days of one word replies and especially refusing to meet.
    I wasted a couple of months on someone like this before (the naivety of youth :rolleyes: ) and it wrecked my head. Nowadays I would be gone in a flash. Life is too short to be bothering and upsetting yourself with messers.

    You will find yourself a girl that will really be into you and trust me, you won't have any worries about whether she's interested as her actions will show it, which is not what you have here.


  • #9
    Idle Passerby
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,133 ✭✭✭Idle Passerby


    Anyclueslads wrote: »
    OP here again , yes shes only known this friend the same length as me. he has a girlfriend and ive no worries about anything going on.

    I tried not texting her for the last 2 days just to see would she make the effort, still nothing. Even when i do text her I just get 1-2 word answers , i asked her was there a problem or is something at her an she says no that its all fine.

    Im getting really annoyed with her now as I dont know what the deal is with her


    She's blowing you off. My guess would be for her the relationship's over and rather than actually tell you that she's hoping you get the hint. Why not ask her straight out, if she says it is just reply "thanks, thats all I needed to know."


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