Bringing Straight Friends to Gay Bars

buachailldana

Hi all! Just looking for people's good opinions on this one.

Went to a gay bar in Cork last night, brought straight friend with me. I'm not mad out on the scene or anything, had only been once before. Anyway dancing away with straight friend on the dance floor, and he's a bit of a hit with the ladies usually.

So he gets chatting to this one, who is also straight, and happens to be out with her friends, all going grand. They shift away anyway and I float around looking for the shift meself

I come back over, and my friend is like surrounded by a group of lesbians who are getting all up in his grill "Don't you know this a gay bar, stop hassling the girls" etc etc. (girl he is shifting is a willing participant in the shift, of course).

Then they start getting all up in my face for bringing a straight person to a gay bar! I was taken aback to say the least! And I mean, there were 6/7 girls all thrusting fingers at my chest, and they were intimidating to say the least!

Now flip this situation around, lets say I had been in a "straight" club, scored with some fella, and next thing I'm surrounded by people telling me its a straight bar and I should stop hassling the fellas.. There would literally be uproar (as seen with the Old Oak incident a few months ago).

This is hardly the norm is it? Am I really that unwelcome to bring anyone other than other gayers with me?

paulmorro

They're idiots! You've every right to go out with a mate whatever they are.

Chuchoter

Unless your friend had said something to provoke those other girls they just sound like assholes. As long as he stayed away from them they had no right to be yelling at him for something they had nothing to do with.

I've never had an issue bringing straight friends places, even when we really should have because one of them was causing hassle.

ANXIOUS

I find that incidents of double standards like this are always swept under the carpet unless the lbgt group are the victims.

This has happened to me on quite a few occasions not being able to socialize in gay establishments with gay friends because of me being straight.

The worst incident was in galway. Some idiot bouncher telling me to head off ill have a better night somewhere else.

Aurongroove

Ouu I wish I was there, I'd've said "a gay bar? well, all the easier for you to go and **** yourselves ladies'

What you describe is such ****ing disgraceful behaviour in any context. Those lesbians were bitches.
What does it matter to them to see two strangers kissing?

secondly what if the couple were bi? what if one or both were TG?
what if the guy was a Drag queen having a night out with his partner in regular cloths?

No need to flip anything around, I would be so angry if that happened to a straight friend of mine.

what the hell!

Idiots I would have found it hard to keep my composure. How dare they!

syklops

ANXIOUS wrote: »

The worst incident was in galway. Some idiot bouncher telling me to head off ill have a better night somewhere else.

How did the bouncer know you were straight?

Aurongroove

syklops wrote: »

How did the bouncer know you were straight?

said in a Tommy cooper voice:

'it was my son'

Babybuff

lesbians get a bit territorial

ANXIOUS

syklops wrote: »

How did the bouncer know you were straight?

I was meeting my friends inside, bouncher said you know what type of club this is. I said yeah im looking forward to having a good night with my friends,

The lack of comments is really disappointing, if it was the other way around there would be 100's.

Op can you name the pub?

BrazIrish

Jesus, this is ridiculous! I went out to a gay bar with straight friends, o big deal on it. Some gay guys were flirting with them, you know it may happens in a gay or regular bar tbh... I don't think gay bars should be only for gays as we can go to any other bar. As someone said before these girls were bitches... unnecessary

sanjo

totally agree with BrazIrish, its the girls in the pub that that were out of order

buachailldana

Ya it was Chambers but it had nothing to do with the venue, just the clientele At least I have verification that I wasn't being in any unreasonable!

Some might say, bitches be craaazy

SteelyDanJalapeno

I'm straight and have always had a good night in Chambers, never seen anything like this OP!

sapere_aude

I hate hearing stories like this... Being able to merge gay and straight friends is one of the amazing things about being gay in the 21st century.

I (relatively) often bring my (straight) best mate to the G and we've never had any bother! He gets hit on all the time (he's a particularly hot guy) but he laughs it off and the guys haven't taken offense when he hasn't responded to their advances. Sure I've had bad nights on the scene for other reasons, but my straight friends have only ever had positive experiences.

In short - don't let these occasional negative stories keep you from bringing your straight friends out. Initially, the toughest thing about being gay for me was the feeling that now I had to live two lives; one with gay friends in gay venues and the other with straight friends in straight venues. Merging the two was a massively positive thing for me and people nowadays rarely give a damn.

Sorry that you had that experience OP! I like to think that by and large the gays are a welcoming bunch and that your story is the exception

Babybuff

I'd bring straight male friends to a gay bar but not so keen on taking straight female friends. unless it was family, they give me nothing but grief anyway.

GalwayGuy92

It's strange that gay bars do this, or rather the clientele more often. It boggles me that it would be so offensive that straight people should be someplace...Although if they're hot it's heartbreaking when they shoot you down :rolleyes::rolleyes:;)

I had a similar experience to one of the other posters actually in a gay bar in Galway, despite being gay. A group of friends and I, most of them are bi or genuinely gay but we were told it wasn't our "kind of place". Whatever that means.