pregnant during career break and abroad!!!

brissygirl

Hi

I have recently found out I am pregnant while in Australia. I am approx 5 weeks gone and just dont know what to do. I moved to Australia with my partner for the year in January and I am on a career break from work until Feb 2013.
For us to be able to do this it would mean me returning to Ireland and my partner staying until the baby was due to try and save money. He will definitly not get a job the ways things are at home at the moment. If I was to stay out here I think it would break my families hearts and I cant imagine doing this without them.

I was wondering does anyone know can I return to work from a career break early, if not will I still be entitles to maternity leave/benefit. I just dont know what I'm going to do as if I do go home I have rented my house out and have no job due to the career break..... how will I manage. I havent told anyone about this at home and am so scared to tell my family.

Any advice or help would be appreciated as I have nobody at home I can talk to

Thanks

mrsWhippy

Firstly, congratulations!

Secondly take a deep breath! You are only 5 weeks, you have plenty of time.

Could you both stay in Oz and return a few weeks/months before the baby is born? Contact your HR department and see what their policies are - just because you are on a career break shouldn't mean you'll lose all your maternity benefits. Don't panic until you know the full story, you may not have to work at all until your maternity leave kicks in sure! Best of luck

How Strange

Congrats and I agree with mrsWhippy. I'm sure it was a huge shock so don't try to make any decisions right now. Take a few weeks, let the news sink and and then start thinking of what to do.

TwoMums2Be

You are just 5 weeks so there is no need to panic about making decisions yet.
Things worth looking into are what your access to healthcare would be as I can tell you that Oz healthcare is pretty superb in my experience.
You can't travel during your final trimester but if you can manage to access healthcare & stay with your partner for as long as possible it's a wonderful experience to share & you can support each other during it
My best advice is to take it easy, try not to stress & wait until you are 12/13 weeks before you make any decisions about your staying/coming home, work etc.

Oh and you could email citizen advice here in Ireland as they should be able to tell you re maternity cover...they are normally super helpful

brissygirl

Thanks so much to everyone for all of your support. My head is still all over the place although I am starting to come to terms with it all now and am just trying to figure out how we can do this the best way.
I havent told my family yet as I want to know what I am doing before I speak to them. I know when I tell my parents they will want me home on the 1st flight but I need to make my own decisions. My parents have always been the ones to try to decide everything that happens and thats why I know even telling them I am thinking of staying here until the 3nd trimester or having the baby here will be very difficult as they will try to tell me what I should be doing and how unfair I am being to them.
Oh if only everything could be more straight forward. It just seems like its all coming from every angle and its so difficult.
I am going to email citizens advice and hope they can give me some info and then have to decide realistically whats best stay here until approx 28 weeks and go home without my patrner, stayhere and have the baby then go home, or go home now with no job and on my own.
I really appreciate all of your support I havent been able to speak to anyone else about this so its been fantastic to know I have this help and advice.
Thanks

TwoMums2Be

Your welcome Having got injured in Oz (1st-3rd degree burns down my leg) I can honestly say that I couldn't have been treated better by the Australian health system & often said I didn't believe I would have ended scar free in Ireland! I also know how hard it is on parents to be so far away at such times & mine aren't the pushy type but this is you and your partners future baby not your parents so ye need to decide what is best for the three of you
It must be hard having nobody to talk to about the situation but feel free to pm me if you want to & you will find a thread soon enough (or you could start one) for the month you are due. Some are more active than others but you will be able to talk about symptoms etc as the months go by which can be very reassuring
You have plenty of time yet...many people tell nobody until after the first trimester so if you don't tell your parents until after that you can use superstition as your alibi

dubontour1

Hi,

Firstly congrats

I know how daunting it is. Myself and my partner found out that I was pregnant over here too. Our first reaction was to go home. I had rang my family and told them I would be home in a few weeks and that I was pregnant. When everything settled down and we had time to think about everything we decided that the best option for us would be to stay put (much to my families disapproval). We wouldn't get jobs at home and we would not be able to give our child everything that she deserved. I can honestly say it has been the best decision we have ever made and coming from me who thought I would last 2 weeks away from my Mam and Dad is saying something.

You have to think what's best for you, if you go home without your partner you will probably end up miserable. You'll be annoyed that he is not with you for this amazing journey. Pregnancy is hard enough to deal with without having your main support person by your side. Your family will get over not having you home for the birth. I'm not going to lie it is hard doing it over here with just the two of us and now that I only have 5 weeks left I would love my mam and dad to be here but even so I am so glad we stuck it out, we will be able to support our child like we want to as opposed to me living at home in my mams spare room.

In terms of your career break, I would find out if you are entitled to maternity leave while over here. If I was you I would get a job here and stay as long as possible to save as much as you can so you have something when you do eventually go home. The wages are higher over here and it is a great opportunity if you are both working to put away a few pound. If you havn't got a job already and your thinking I can't get a job now cause I'm pregnant, I did it. I changed jobs when I was 10 weeks as the previous job cut my hours and I had no contract. So it all worked out.

I have to say aswell the health care over here is amazing too. I couldn't fault it and it is all covered through the reciprocal care agreement. The only thing we have to pay for is ultrasounds and some bloods.

You will be fine. Just enjoy what is happening to you. It is a great time for you and your partner and it brings you much closer together. It would be an awful shame if the two of you could not experience it together and I truely feel if you left and went home without him you may regret it.

Best of luck with everything. I hope it all works out for you.

notsobusy

Another thumbs up for the care over there. I had an epileptic seizure when I was over there 5 yrs ago. They were fantastic. It was my first seizure so was all the place. The docs were great and I didn't feel like I had to go home. My parents didn't want me to come home(another story) anyway.

The only thing I had to pay for after all my brain scans and mri's was the trip in the ambulance