Hey Mr. Sooofffttt!!

LegacyUser

Hi Guys,

Not a big deal really but it's been playing on my mind and I'm looking for some sound advice.

I met a great guy through mutual friends 2 weeks ago. I'd met him a few times before but I was seeing someone then and so was he so nothing happened. 2 weeks ago however we were all out in a bar and we ended up scoring. We went on to a club were we were dancing like idiots and having great fun. We got very drunk and went back to my place. Long story short, we were making out and he told me he thinks I'm really sexy etc etc but when it came to the crunch....ahem....mr. floppy paid a visit!

No big deal really, we were both wasted and I understand that can happen. We fell asleep and the next morning he left for work. We didn't try again the next morning, I think we both felt too self conscience and hungover!

Roll forward to the following weekend were we meet again. This time we're getting on just as well as the last time. We go back to his and the same thing happens again! Everything was going great, kisses were really sexy and so was touching but the same thing happened, he just couldn't get it up.

I left the next morning with a quick kiss goodbye and that is that. I haven't heard from him since and that was a week ago.

I just feel a bit down about the whole thing. I actually really like him and it doesn't bother me that it happened. It was down to alcohol. But my thinking is, if he liked me enough he wouldn't have drank so much the second time and if he liked me enough he'd have called by now.

What do you guys think, is it me? Did he just not fancy me enough? Do you think he's too embarrassed to call me or is he clearly just not into me??

Any insights would be great! Like I said, i don't really mind and am just gonna let it go but I'm curious!

Oh, just to add, a friend of mine knows him really well and told me that he's a huge hit with girls. Apparently he scores all the time etc. He is very good looking and charning! We're both 31 btw!!

Herrick

Oh God on both occasions he couldn't get it up :eek: He must be mortified :eek: If that happened to me once with a girl , I'd die, never mind twice

I doubt very much he'll get in contact after that OP he's probably very embarrassed.

In fairness I doubt its he doesn't fancy you, he had no problem going home with you

I reckon its the drink affecting him. But I think you may have to make the move here and maybe ask him out? If you like him that much.

But make sure this time theres no alcohol involved

dougieruggie

Without offering medical advice, maybe he should see a doctor. At that age, testosterone levels can be low and it might be that he needs to be prescribed some steroids. Whether he does or not is for the doctor to decide but it wont hurt in getting his test levels checked.

Although it would probably be weird if you mentioned that to him considering you dont really know him.

Chinafoot

Graceisace wrote: »

if he liked me enough he'd have called by now.

Have you contacted him?

He's probably mortified.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies.

I haven't contacted him and i know that he's probably embarrassed but my head was wrecked all week thinking that maybe it happened twice cos he didn;t fancy me enough.
Without meaning to sound big-headed I am a good looking girl though and he seemed to fancy me but i dunno....he's a very good looking guy too who i know for a fact scores all the time. I don't know, I can't really get in touch now because too much time has elapsed. If i see him out and about again which i most likely will then maybe it'll be third time lucky...here's hoping:)

Or maybe he won't wanna come near me for fear it'll happen again...ahhh....so frustrating!!!

LittleBook

Graceisace wrote: »

It was down to alcohol. But my thinking is, if he liked me enough he wouldn't have drank so much the second time and if he liked me enough he'd have called by now.

There could be a bit of a catch 22 involved here ... on the one hand maybe he likes you too and needs the old dutch courage (wow, I'm on fire with the idioms today ) to get up the nerve to see you ... on the other hand, this means he can't get anything up.

If you are interested in giving it another chance (and he's interested too) you should consider a dry date.

If there's still a problem ... alcohol is not the problem.

aidan24326

dougieruggie wrote: »

Without offering medical advice, maybe he should see a doctor. At that age, testosterone levels can be low and it might be that he needs to be prescribed some steroids. Whether he does or not is for the doctor to decide but it wont hurt in getting his test levels checked.

Although it would probably be weird if you mentioned that to him considering you dont really know him.

He's only 31, not 61. Likely to be nothing to do with testosterone and lots to do with excess alcohol/possible anxiety.

Graceisace wrote: »

Thanks for the replies.

I haven't contacted him and i know that he's probably embarrassed but my head was wrecked all week thinking that maybe it happened twice cos he didn;t fancy me enough.

Probably (almost certainly) nothing to do with him not fancying you. If he had too much to drink, that'll be your culprit. The second time was down to a combination of alcohol and no doubt anxiety from the previous time.

Without meaning to sound big-headed I am a good looking girl though and he seemed to fancy me but i dunno....he's a very good looking guy too who i know for a fact scores all the time. I don't know, I can't really get in touch now because too much time has elapsed. If i see him out and about again which i most likely will then maybe it'll be third time lucky...here's hoping:)

Or maybe he won't wanna come near me for fear it'll happen again...ahhh....so frustrating!!!

It's only been a week. If you like him there's no reason why you can't contact him and ask him if he'd like to meet up. Minus the alcohol this time, and take it slowly as far as bedroom activity goes. Give him a chance to get to know you and feel more comfortable with you, and get over his previous mishap, and there shouldn't be a problem.

dougieruggie

aidan24326 wrote: »

He's only 31, not 61. Likely to be nothing to do with testosterone and lots to do with excess alcohol/possible anxiety.

One in four men over 30 have low testosterone levels.
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Healthday/story?id=4508669&page=1

Maybe its the alcohol, maybe its anxiety, but it could also be medical.

Chinafoot

Graceisace wrote: »

I can't really get in touch now because too much time has elapsed.

He's probably thinking exactly the same.

Graceisace wrote: »

Or maybe he won't wanna come near me for fear it'll happen again...ahhh....so frustrating!!!

And he could be thinking you won't want to go near him again in case it happens again.

Look, if you like him contact him. It's been a week - hardly ages ago. If you don't want to ring him send him a casual text asking how he is, tell him you had fun last week and ask if he fancies meeting up again. You can even make a joke and say "maybe with a little less booze "

It doesn't need to be a big deal really.