Long distance relationship

LegacyUser

Ok i wouldn't exactly call this a relationship issue, i'm just looking for people's views, experience and help if possible.

So i started talking to a girl from Australia last July and it was just a chat room type site me and my friend would go on to talk to randomers from ireland and all that. So i was just talking to this girl as she was very upset over breaking up with a guy she was e-dating and i was just there to console her. so as time went on i became good friends with her as we talked daily. now let me point out that, although i was single, i was not looking for anyone on this site. yes i have visited dating sites in the past but that wasn't the objective of me going on this site.

so anyway, as time passed we became closer and closer and we were getting more attracted to each other. we would talk on skype a lot and flirt a bit and by december we had told each other that we really liked each other. regardless of me ever talking to her, she had planned to go travelling around europe and visit ireland in particular. she also hopes to get a job in london when she finished college in october.

so in knowing all this we planned to meet up when she comes over here in october or november this year and lets just say, it wouldn't be as friends! i live in munster and i wouldn't even do long distance with people in dublin! so here's me trying to hook up with someone in australia but i really fell for her. i also feel that young people these days use the word "love" too fast and they don't genuinely mean it. well i promised myself i'd never say it until we met but with every day passing i was falling for her even more.

a few weeks ago i was talking to her online and she said she's been hiding her feelings for the last month and she told me she loved me. i've only ever had one relationship in my life, which wasn't great, and i'm 23. so hearing this word for the first time left me speechless. some of you might think this is a bit silly but i honestly got the weirdest feeling ever in my stomach and my eyes got all watery. it was at this point i knew that i loved her too so i called her the next day and told her it over the phone. it was a big moment for me in my life as i've never said it to anyone, but it felt right.

I know its 8 months away but i've agreed to not see any women until then, which isn't too hard as i don't go out much. Already i'm finding it kind of hard as 8 months is so far away and i just want to be with her so bad. I know these online relationships can be hard but she makes me so happy and good things have started to happen to me since i started talking to her. She's such a good person. There's not a bad bone in her body. I just think we're perfect for each other

Now my questions for the people here would be:

1) Do you think i'm crazy falling for someone i've never met?
2) Should i have said i loved her, and vice versa, seeing as we've never met?
3) Does anyone have a similar experience to this and how did it pan out if so?
4) What are your views on this whole situation?

Sorry for making this so long and i hope i didn't bore ye :P

Any feedback greatly appreciated. Thanks

LegacyUser

I hate when no one gets a reply just leaves the op in despair anyway here is what i have to say might be of no use whatsoever to you but here goes

Q1.No i don't with skype its like the person is there and you've been talking with months so there is obviously more a connection than just friends

Q2.I think when you've both said its obvious that ye have something special and its not like you said it to each other after five minutes you have gotten to know each other.Others have posted on the this forum before about the same thing so i think its common to develop feelings before you've actually met someone i'm not sure how it works out though but hopefully happily ever after .

Q3.No i don't but when it comes to long distance i suppose if you want something bad enough you can make it work and by the sounds of things ye want it too .Plus i'm a utter romantic and hopeful so i hope it works out for ye

Q4.The whole situation sure just go for it, if it doesn't work out then at least you tried it and can have no regrets or why didn't i do that ? feelings later on and if it does work out then its a cute story to tell the grand kids :P .As for staying monogamous until she gets here sure see how it goes over the next few months as time actually does fly but i know when your counting the days it can go incredibly slow. Just belong honest with each other is the most important thing and from the sounds of it ye may have something special as you said yourself she makes you happy and you've never said 'I love you' to anyone before which speaks for itself .

Although there will be many here who will be completely disagree with me and be all negative but just look on the bright side and ignore the begrudgers :P
I'm joking of course ....


Anyway

Hope this helps ya i know its not the best advice but its something hopefully giving you a bit of optimism and i hope it works out for ye both

Goodluck

(Sorry for the bad spelling i never really write such a long post when replying so its abit all over the place .)

LegacyUser

well i think you should stick it out as it sounds like the both of you really love each other and i wish the 2 of ye best for the future

shortys94

Was in a long distance relationship for a year and a half, it works if both people are committed, I ended it for my own reasons but I think that a long distance relationship really is romantic and makes the time you spend together a lot more special

Princess Peach

I'm in a long distance relationship now. When we started I lived in Munster and he lived in Dublin, which really isn't that far! I live in Canada now. Our relationship works really great because we are both committed.

I think it can work because she is planning on coming to Europe. It would be one thing if neither of ye had any intention on ever moving.

My advice is keep things going as they are since you seem to be happy. Its natural to be unsure about whether your feelings are real given the circumstances, but keep with her if thats what you want. You will know for sure then when you meet her whether you do love her, and can decide then what to do from there.

LegacyUser

Thanks very much for the feedback. You all seem to think what i originally thought so i'm happy about that hopefully it all works out anyway but i think it will be an amazing relationship when she finally gets to ireland later in the year

duke916

Im in the same situation really. Met a girl in Canada on a dating site just after christmas. Didnt think much of it but general chat at the beginning with her being there and me being here. But things soon changed. Both mad about each other and feelings grew pretty quick. She's coming over to see me in May for three weeks and I really cant wait til the day i meet her at the airport. I always thought stories like these only happened in the movies. Anyway, i wish you the best of luck and hope it all goes well for ya!