Never good enough

LegacyUser

This is something that has been bothering me for quite a while. I'm a 22 year old girl and I have a bit of a problem when it comes to guys.
Most of my frinds have no bother finding someone to go out with. I'm the odd one out it seems. All the fellas I know or get to know just want to have sex with me. I have been told I'm good looking and I get a LOT of attention from men, it's just all the wrong kind.
Fellas are always texting me to "meet up" which round here is just code for sex. Rarely I do just to give myself the feeling of being wanted but I feel horrible afterwards.
It hurts when I see these guys having fun or chatting to girls they are friends with and have respect for. I hate that I'm never the one who gets brought home to meet their parents. They never want me to meet their friends. It feels like I'm just not good enough. They only see me as a girl for one thing and one thing only.
Girls don't really like me either because of the attention I get but it's not my fault! I just feel terrible because of it.
Why might this be happening? Does anyone have any advice?

skooterblue2

These are 22-24 year old guys? Yep been there worn the t-shirt and everything else. Not one of the finest moments in our lifetimes as regards morals and dependability.

You are probably looking for a more mature type of guy. Try dating older guys. Its a tough one to broach ..... you have to take a chance on one of them.

There are no perfect guys out there but there are a hell of a lot of good ones.

cynder

A lot of genuine guys who are looking for a girlfriend and are probably to shy to ask or think because you are good looking that they would not be good enough, then you have the brazen guy who is after a quickie and that's all they want is another notch on the bedpost.

How to find a boyfriend? the age old question, what will be, will be....

Best places to look would be work, college or a friend of a friend, not night clubs or pubs. If you find someone you like perhaps you should make the first move and ask him out on a date. Be the chaser instead of the chased?

skooterblue2

So true!!! The place is the Serengeti out there with allsorts. As above dont always be the prey. If you want to start to look for suitable material. Observe a guy in a non stalkerish way. The guy who is confident and is comfortable in his own skin with an idea of where he is going is a far better prospect than the "Whirlwind" guy.

Seen my friend with one of these guys. Took her in, rasseled he dazzeled her and when he was done, he spat her out. If they seem too good to be true then they probably are!

lace

Sounds like you're a very pretty girl and that you're attracting the kind of guys who are confident in themselves and will chance their arm for a ONS but have no interest in actually getting to know you or being friends. Guys who are more likely to be good to you, get to know you and actually care about you as a person are probably a little taken aback by your good looks and think they won't have a chance. They probably see you talking to all these other chancers and feel like there's no way you'd be interested in them.

I'd suggest trying a different way of meeting people in the hope of meeting a different calibre of guys. For example, if you usually meet guys by going out to pubs/clubs/parties etc. then maybe it's time to try a book club or a charity group.

Getting involved in a new club/group/activity/hobby would give you the opportunity to meet different guys who are (hopefully) interested in the same things you are. Set aside the idea of meeting a boyfriend just for the moment and just get to know people. Hopefully you'll build up a good base of male friends and maybe even hit it off on another level with one!

Volunteering with a club/charity might be a good way to meet guys who care about others and have an interest in more than getting themselves the sh*g.

jeep37

The most important bit of advice I can give you is to give all types of guys a chance when they initiate things with you, not just the "hot" ones. And out of the guys who don't initiate things with you, give them implications of interest (and again not just the "hot" ones!).

Most females in this country seem to be waiting for Mr. Perfect who's hot, confident and appreciative of them only. For the most part, any given guy will only possess 1 or 2 of those qualities, not all 3. The most important of those qualities to you is the third one, which is the only one you won't be able to see initially. If he possesses the first two (hot, confident), he's very, very unlikely to possess the 3rd quality (appreciative of you only) which is the most important to you. Remembering that should help you find the one you're looking for. Good luck.

Stormageddon

OP I've always had a similar problem (though I'm no stunner by any means, might have more to do with a bust Dolly Parton would be proud of) Though I'm not even looking for some hot guy to take me home to mammy. If I ever meet someone new and try to talk to them about music/movies/what they had for dinner/WHATEVER they either go quiet (chat/msging) or try to turn the conversation around to sex/meeting for sex. I'm not a prude at all, and a bit of flirting is fine but there's literally nothing else.
And lads, I'm not Babestation.
Is it too much to ask to be treated respectfully, and as a friend rather than a crusty old sock?