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My dad wasn't around much growing up....

  • 17-02-2012 10:02pm
    #1
    harmoniums
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 533 ✭✭✭


    He had a sh1t job and had to work as much overtime as possible in order to keep a roof over our heads and foods in our bellies.

    My mother used to worry about not really having a male figure around and was constantly up-braiding my younger brother for sitting down to pee.

    I remember driving down the country once to see our grandparents and him asking to have the car pulled over to use de toilah

    So anyway he got out, pulled down his 1978 porno shorts and proceeded to squat down, to which my mother started screaming, "STAND UP!!! DO IT LIKE A MAN!!!!!"


    So he stood up and shat all down the backs of his legs.

    gas times!


Comments

  • #2
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    I do not even know what to say about that.


  • #3
    The King of Moo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭The King of Moo


    Possible link between growing up without a father figure and making sh*t threads?


  • #4
    Seachmall
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,041 ✭✭✭Seachmall


    1978 was a great year for porno shorts.

    Your father was a wise man.


  • #5
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    cloud493 wrote: »
    I do not even know what to say about that.

    It's better if you imagine Morgan Freeman narrating it


  • #6
    SafeSurfer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,973 ✭✭✭SafeSurfer


    Jesus,Gay Mitchell, pull yourself together

    Multo autem ad rem magis pertinet quallis tibi vide aris quam allis



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  • #7
    El Guapo!
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    I did NOT expect that from the thread title........WTF?? :confused:


  • #8
    Captain Morgan Freeman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 279 ✭✭Captain Morgan Freeman


    Gummy Panda wrote: »
    It's better if you imagine Morgan Freeman narrating it
    Im going to have to start charging royalties.


  • #9
    ChunkyLover_53
    Closed Accounts Posts: 901 ✭✭✭ChunkyLover_53


    Gummy Panda wrote: »
    It's better if you imagine Morgan Freeman narrating it

    I went with Professor Zoidberg from Futurama


  • #10
    Peetrik
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,674 ✭✭✭Peetrik


    hahaha I thought it was hilarious :)


  • #11
    44leto
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,137 ✭✭✭44leto


    I think it was a joke, and a funny one, but in the wrong thread.


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  • #12
    Latchy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    First line was ok ...then it all went down the trouser leg .


  • #13
    staker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,677 ✭✭✭staker


    So he tried to pull a fast one and filled his boots?


  • #14
    harmoniums
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 533 ✭✭✭harmoniums


    44leto wrote: »
    I think it was a joke, and a funny one, but in the wrong thread.

    Not a joke, actually happened!


  • #15
    Red Hand
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,986 ✭✭✭Red Hand


    ChunkyLover_53 wrote: »
    I went with Professor Zoidberg from Futurama

    Excellent choice. I'd pay to have him replace David Attenborough for wildlife documentaries.


  • #16
    44leto
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,137 ✭✭✭44leto


    harmoniums wrote: »
    Not a joke, actually happened!

    What kid watches his ma pee.:confused::confused:


  • #17
    Doc Ruby
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,956 ✭✭✭Doc Ruby


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaqC5FnvAEc


  • #18
    Seachmall
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,041 ✭✭✭Seachmall


    44leto wrote: »
    What kid watches his ma pee.:confused::confused:

    The same kid who grew up watching his father **** himself...?


  • #19
    LH Pathe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,515 ✭✭✭LH Pathe


    The King of Moo wrote: »
    Possible link between growing up without a father figure and making sh*t threads?

    I'd say it's more a case of growing up with a father figure n thus making shît treads


  • #20
    Ficheall
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,034 ✭✭✭Ficheall


    harmoniums wrote: »
    and was constantly up-braiding my younger brother for

    Well, I learned a new word. That doesn't happen often in AH. Cheers, OP.


  • #21
    LH Pathe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,515 ✭✭✭LH Pathe


    I bet he braided his brothers matted cootie hair


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  • #22
    efb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 35,514 ✭✭✭✭efb


    my dad never taught me how to shit, nature did!


  • #23
    nice_very
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,723 ✭✭✭nice_very


    Dean09 wrote: »
    I did NOT expect that from the thread title........WTF?? :confused:

    me either... I was expecting it to be a "thats why I do drugs/rob people/am a scumbag" excuse type of thread, refreshing to see the OP is not any of those things, yet grew up with little fatherly influence!


    so, really... what are the scumbags excuses?


  • #24
    WoollyRedHat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,462 ✭✭✭✭WoollyRedHat


    And how did that make you feel? ( Quistive stare)


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