Should I call it a day?

mike0c

Hi,

I have been going out with a girl for over 4 years. We have our ups and downs like most couples but for the most part get on really well.

For the last 6 months or so she has changed her attitude. She is really tempermental and flies off the handle over something really small, one minute she's fine the next she could go crazy for very little reason, really up and down and hard to judge. That for the most part I can deal with. It's her partying that has got me to a point of maybe calling it a day.

She now goes out more and makes no contact, granted she always goes home but she will stay out until 5 or 6. The only contact that is ever made on a night out is if I instigate it. I don't want to be texting her while she's out but her lack of contact has me worried. She used to up until this point always send nice messages 2-3 times a night, now she ignores calls and barely responds, if even.

I don't know what to do, this whole change in attitude has me worried and up all night on her nights out. She knows this and says she's sorry but it keeps happening over and over again. I'm not sure what to do, am I overreacting or should I call it a day and just get out??

For the record I've told her I can't go on like this a few times before but she still keeps doing it, saying when she's out she's "not thinking about making contact", shes "only thinking about having fun", but she used to make contact before???

pigman2000

sounds like she's unhappy and wants out but is too chicken to do the deed and end it - it's very common

dixiefly

I dont agree with Sunflower. After 4 years together you deserve more than that and those nights out until 4 or 5 in the morning that dont include you should be few and far between.

On it's own I wouldnt use it as a reason to call it a day but, together with the change in attitude, then you are right to think about whether to continue with her.

Your ages is probably a factor in all of this. She may feel that she is too young to settle down but, if she does think that, then she should be up front with you.

You need to ask yourself whether you still love her and if you think that she loves you. If you are not certain that the answer is yes then maybe you should have "the talk" and consider the options that is best for you both.

cafecolour

Do you still have an active sex life and all that? If not, then she's probably cooled on you, and I'd get out.

Another option - sudden moodiness, partying until 5 am, etc. could mean she's developed a drug addition (ala coke or such). Any other signs of such?

Virgil°

Sounds like she is fed up having to account for her whereabouts

Honestly it sounds more like she has started to withdraw affection and now the OP is left feeling insecure because of it.

I'm sorry OP but i think pigman is right. She's fallen out of love with you and wants to break up but hasn't built the nerve. So she's resorted to picking fights over nothing in a bid to get you to break up with her.

Is she affectionate with you anymore at all?

Sorry for the crap news but I think she may be gone. Ask her straight out about it and decide for yourself I think.

cynder

First port of call talk to her, see what she says and take from there.