Walks into a bar jokes. (really bad)

Capt'n Midnight

A virus walks into a bar.
the bartender says "We don't serve viruses in this bar."
The virus replaces the bartender and says "Now we do."

A infectious disease walks into bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve infectious disease in this bar."
The infectious disease says "Well, you're not a very good host."

Two bacteria walk into a bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve bacteria in this bar."
The bacteria says "But we work here! We're staff."

A room temperature superconductor walks into a bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve any superconductors in this bar.
The room temperature superconductor leaves without putting up any resistance.

A infrared photon walks into a bar and says "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?"

A neutrino walks into a bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve neutrino in this bar."
The neutrino says "Hey, I was just passing through."

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar.
And didn't.

The Higgs boson walks into church.
The Priest says "We don't allow Higgs bosons in here"
The Higgs boson says "But without me, how can you have mass?

A statistician walks into just your average bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve statistician in this bar."
The statistician says "Well, you're just mean."

A some helium gas just drifts into a bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve noble gases in this bar."
The helium didn't react.

Bootup

A pair of battery jumper cables walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "You can come in here, but you better not start anything!"





A Latin scholar walks into a bar and says, "I'll have a martinus."

The bartender asks him. "Don't you mean martini?"The man tells the bartender, "Listen, if I wanted two or more drinks I would have asked for them."




A brain goes into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a beer, please.

The bartender says, "Sorry, I can't serve you. You're out of your head."

Skuxx

Two blondes walk into a bar....you'd think one of them would have seen it!!

Bootup

A guy walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road."



An amnesiac walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do I come here often"?




A guy with dyslexia walks into a Bra.




A young Texan walks into a bar and orders a drink. "Got any ID?" asks the bartender

The Texan replies,"About what"?