More confidence!

Dublin_Andy

Well, I took 15 hours of lessons in April 2011 with a fantastic instructor, and towards the end of them I felt fairly comfortable driving around without any trouble or mistakes..

4 months passed and I got my first car in August '11. Went practicing in around sandyford industrial estate and empty car parks with my dad just to get a feel of the car before I went out on the main roads with him..

Now, I'm at at the stage where I go out once or twice at the weekend with him for maybe 2 hours out around the local area and I don't feel confident at all. I feel apprehensive even backing out of the inclined driveway! When its time to go i think to myself "ugh do i have to"! My dad says I look nervous all the time when out driving and I don't look in control behind the wheel. He is critical about certain aspects of my driving but I know he is only trying to help me get better. I am also nervous about other road users and all this stuff plays around in my head " what if this situation occurs, what if i don't make this hillstart at the traffic lights, what if i conk out" etc etc.

I don't know how to overcome these nerves..Am I nervous that I'm not performing to my dads driving standards? Is he making me nervous while driving? I don't know, I feel I have reached a plateau in my driving where I'm not getting better and not gaining confidence in my driving...

any advice on this please?

My Learner Permit is up this month and I'm going to have to renew it! does it really take this long to not worry about going out driving!

Having said all that I'm a cautious driver and haven't hit anything!

Kajemo

OP I was exactly like you I use to dread going out driving, even for days before hand if I knew I has a lesson at the weekend or anything like that. The only advice I can give is don't give up keep at it and eventually you won't even be thinking about it. As for worrying about the hill starts, traffic lights conking out etc don't be thinking too much about them this will only make you more nervous, you'll be surprised how you'll handle these situations when you are actually faced with them. Go out and drive as much as you can it will soon feel like second nature. I was exactly like you and I passed test 1st go last week! So you can sk it don't give up!!

macroman

You're working yourself up about it. Get someone else to go out with you, and just take it one step at a time. It can be frustrating to drive with someone you know and even worse if you've to live with them - I have my license years and usually end up arguing with my Dad when either of us is driving.

I've had loads of people ask me to go out driving with them, I just sit their and let them get on with it, if they've a question I'll answer it, and if they stall if they need it I'll help them. Usually I'll tell them if they missed anything but not in a demeaning manor - sometimes family members can be more vocal, which if you're only learning could leave your confidence at rock bottom.

username123

Dublin_Andy wrote: »

My dad says I look nervous all the time when out driving and I don't look in control behind the wheel. He is critical about certain aspects of my driving but I know he is only trying to help me get better.

Note to OPs Dad - telling someone they look nervous all the time and not in control behind the wheel is NOT constructive criticism or advice!! Thats only going to make them more nervous!! Tell them that they have done great, they are coming along, and they have all the time in the world!!!

OP - I was only discussing this recently with a friend who learned at the same time I did - we reckoned we'd lost pounds in weight in sweat alone for the first couple of years driving. It just takes time. Dont worry - you get used to it.

Fourteen

Yeah, I agree with the people saying it often doesn't help to be with someone in your family. It's not surprising you were more confident after working with the instructor, more of a formal thing, they're patient and won't be overly-critical. My instructor helps a million times more than my parents.

Do you have a friend who has a full license? If so, ask them to give you a hand. That would probably help build your confidence up again. The best thing to do, like with anything else, is to keep with it and practice. The more experience, the more confidence.

Don't worry about what-ifs! Waste of time!

Good luck!