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Ex taking new partner to court?

  • 06-01-2012 11:08am
    #1
    silly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,722 ✭✭✭


    My ex has stopped paying maintenance for our daughter completely. Was never a regular payment and was constantly in and out of court.
    I got married a few months ago and ex has said that if I bring him to court for maintenance again he will make sure my husband will be summoned also to declare his earnings. This is something I don't want as my husband is a very private man and I don't think he should have to go to court because of my ex.
    Can he really do this? Can my husbands earnings be taken into to consideration so my ex will get away with paying less/ or not atall??


Comments

  • #2
    ciarafem
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 91 ✭✭ciarafem


    silly wrote: »
    My ex has stopped paying maintenance for our daughter completely. Was never a regular payment and was constantly in and out of court.
    I got married a few months ago and ex has said that if I bring him to court for maintenance again he will make sure my husband will be summoned also to declare his earnings. This is something I don't want as my husband is a very private man and I don't think he should have to go to court because of my ex.
    Can he really do this? Can my husbands earnings be taken into to consideration so my ex will get away with paying less/ or not atall??

    That's terrible. I don't know the answer, but I would think that it is an issue between you and the father. Surely he has a legal responsibility towards his child, not your new husband.


  • #3
    MagicSean
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,897 ✭✭✭MagicSean


    ciarafem wrote: »
    That's terrible. I don't know the answer, but I would think that it is an issue between you and the father. Surely he has a legal responsibility towards his child, not your new husband.

    If they share custody equally and split the school,clothing and education bills between them then why would there be any need for child support?


  • #4
    silly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,722 ✭✭✭silly


    MagicSean wrote: »
    ciarafem wrote: »
    That's terrible. I don't know the answer, but I would think that it is an issue between you and the father. Surely he has a legal responsibility towards his child, not your new husband.

    If they share custody equally and split the school,clothing and education bills between them then why would there be any need for child support?
    I share custody with my daughters father. ( not that he asks to see her much)
    He does not pay one penny towards anything.
    My new husband is not my daughters father.


  • #5
    Slozer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 200 ✭✭Slozer


    He can request this but it is certainly not required and the judge will not ask for it. Your solicitor should be able to tell you this. Take him to court and make him pay for both your daughter's welfare. this is between you and him and should not involve your husband. If your ex is working make sure you get weekly maintanence, half education expenses and half medical expenses at the very least.


  • #6
    MagicSean
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,897 ✭✭✭MagicSean


    silly wrote: »
    I share custody with my daughters father. ( not that he asks to see her much)
    He does not pay one penny towards anything.
    My new husband is not my daughters father.

    Must be hard on the child to be stuck between a father that doesn't want to be there and a man who is there but doesn't want to be a father.

    My point was that if a person has taken on the costs of raising the child equally then why should there be any maintenance payments required? I wasn't talking about your case specifically.


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  • #7
    silly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,722 ✭✭✭silly


    It's not that my husband doesn't want to be her father, but the simple case is he is not her father. It was my decision to not have him pay half for things that her father should be paying. Food/elec/heating is of course paid for by me and my husband. But when it comes to school uniform/outings/ extra cirricular activites/Santa presents/ clothing/dr visits, I feel that her father should be paying a maintenance to help with the cost of this, not my husband who has his own business and doesn't ask me to pay for things for that. We both have our separate bills.


  • #8
    aujopimur
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,953 ✭✭✭aujopimur


    Your husbands income has no bearing on your ex's child maintainance obligation, consult a family law solicitor


  • #9
    Victor
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,580 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    MagicSean wrote: »
    If they share custody equally and split the school,clothing and education bills
    Who is saying this?


  • #10
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    MagicSean wrote: »
    Must be hard on the child to be stuck between a father that doesn't want to be there and a man who is there but doesn't want to be a father.

    My point was that if a person has taken on the costs of raising the child equally then why should there be any maintenance payments required? I wasn't talking about your case specifically.



    Surely its the shared responsibility morally & legally for the father to look after his own child no matter if his ex has moved on with some one else or not.He is the childs father and always will be.


  • #11
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    TBH if your husbands income has any bearing on what maintenance your ex pays then your ex has every right to ask to have his income declared to the courts.

    Put it this way, you're now married so the financial burden on you has lessened, you technically pay less, but you want your ex to pay the same.

    This of course is only relevant if your husband's income effects things, I don't know if it does.


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  • #12
    MagicSean
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,897 ✭✭✭MagicSean


    Victor wrote: »
    Who is saying this?

    I was talking in general in response to the post. There would be cases where demanding child maintenance would not necessarily be fair.
    realies wrote: »
    Surely its the shared responsibility morally & legally for the father to look after his own child no matter if his ex has moved on with some one else or not.He is the childs father and always will be.

    Look after in what way? If a couple share custody and bills equally then why would child maintenance be needed?


  • #13
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    MagicSean wrote: »
    I was talking in general in response to the post. There would be cases where demanding child maintenance would not necessarily be fair.



    Look after in what way? If a couple share custody and bills equally then why would child maintenance be needed?


    The relationship with the mother has failed, that can happen, Are you saying that because a woman meets up with some one else and moves on that there should be no responsibility financially & otherwise from the father of there child ? Has a father not got a duty to pay maintenance for a child that he helped bring into this world,even if the money was being put into a bank acct for later on for college/studies etc.


  • #14
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    Lot of magics in this thread ;-)


  • #15
    MagicSean
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,897 ✭✭✭MagicSean


    realies wrote: »
    The relationship with the mother has failed, that can happen, Are you saying that because a woman meets up with some one else and moves on that there should be no responsibility financially & otherwise from the father of there child ? Has a father not got a duty to pay maintenance for a child that he helped bring into this world,even if the money was being put into a bank acct for later on for college/studies etc.

    Are you even reading my posts? I will say it once again, if both parents share custody equally and split all the childs bills then why should there be a need for any maintenance?


  • #16
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    realies wrote: »
    The relationship with the mother has failed, that can happen, Are you saying that because a woman meets up with some one else and moves on that there should be no responsibility financially & otherwise from the father of there child ? Has a father not got a duty to pay maintenance for a child that he helped bring into this world,even if the money was being put into a bank acct for later on for college/studies etc.
    Where did I say the ex shouldn't pay anything?


  • #17
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    Getting a bit mixed up with your user names


  • #18
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    MagicSean wrote: »
    Are you even reading my posts? I will say it once again, if both parents share custody equally and split all the child's bills then why should there be a need for any maintenance?


    I agree that in its self would be the maintenance.


  • #19
    the_syco
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 37,316 ✭✭✭✭the_syco


    Let me play the devils advocate...
    MagicSean wrote: »
    Look after in what way? If a couple share custody and bills equally then why would child maintenance be needed?
    Lets swing the door the other way: as her mother now has a new husband, does she need contact with her biological father?
    MagicSean wrote: »
    If they share custody equally and split the school,clothing and education bills between them then why would there be any need for child support?
    Although the custody is in theory split equally, the childs' biological father doesn't seem to want to see his daughter much, nor contribute towards his daughter. Is it simply a case of "find a replacement" and the biological father can cut all times with his daughter?


  • #20
    silly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,722 ✭✭✭silly


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    TBH if your husbands income has any bearing on what maintenance your ex pays then your ex has every right to ask to have his income declared to the courts.

    Put it this way, you're now married so the financial burden on you has lessened, you technically pay less, but you want your ex to pay the same.

    This of course is only relevant if your husband's income effects things, I don't know if it does.
    Quite the opposite really.
    I have moved out of my parents home and I now have a mortgage to pay etc.
    But I know that is not my ex's responsibility.
    I'm not asking for much. What was agreed the last time we were in court late 2010 was €50 a week plus €20 off arrears. Arrears was about 2 grand at the time, but I'd more like €4-5 grand now.
    Anything is better than receiving nothing.
    I pay for everything for my daughter myself. School books are expensive as are uniforms etc. Santa doesn't come cheap either. I'm struggling to say the least.


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