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Work xmas party horror stories

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  • 24-12-2011 4:18pm
    #1
    Kimia
    Registered Users Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭


    Was working in a pub during my college days and we had a work night out where we all god absolutely sh*t faced. I with the booze in me start thinking I'm Beyonce and do my moves on the dance floor only to be escorted off because I was holding a glass of rum & coke over my head and apparently it was against the rules, buzz kill.

    Then ended up kissing this guy of about 18 (oh the shame) who I worked with whos mam owned the bar and who was there. :o

    I'm sure there must be some funny stories out there so share!


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    #2
    mathepac
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,991 ✭✭✭mathepac


    Kimia wrote: »
    .... I'm sure there must be some funny stories out there so share!
    I'm sure there must be like, loads. Why not start with your "funny incident"?


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    #3
    Brendog
    Registered Users Posts: 1,976 ✭✭✭Brendog


    was at my xmas work party and i kissed a female colleague that I've liked for ages. Everyone cheered and I think Ricky Gervais took credit for it.....


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    #4
    InkSlinger67
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭InkSlinger67


    Brendog wrote: »
    ....and I think Ricky Gervais took credit for it.....

    Did he do a stupid dance afterwards by any chance?


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    #5
    Senna
    Registered Users Posts: 8,800 ✭✭✭Senna


    We haven't had a proper staff party since the year the boss got drunk and insulted a girl who then left the job over it. In fairness the insults were very funny and she was just a stuck up bitch, everyone else gave as good as they got but some people have no sense of humour.


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    #6
    Kimia
    Registered Users Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    Senna wrote: »
    We haven't had a proper staff party since the year the boss got drunk and insulted a girl who then left the job over it. In fairness the insults were very funny and she was just a stuck up bitch, everyone else gave as good as they got but some people have no sense of humour.

    What did he say to her?


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    #7
    amacca
    Registered Users Posts: 6,843 ✭✭✭amacca


    Kimia wrote: »
    What did he say to her?

    Darling...I find the thought of spending time with you about as appealing as that of being forced to hack my own genitals off with a blunt spoon!

    it was probably that or

    you sir are a minger!


    I cant remember fully what happened at my Christmas party...........I made some sort of drunken shambles of an approach towards a girl I like in work....I dont think she was too into it (I cant say I blame her - despite not being able to remember what I done...I'm sure it was probably about as attractive as roadkill)


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    #8
    Nforce
    Registered Users Posts: 2,924 ✭✭✭Nforce


    Going back a few years now...but at a dinner dance the MD was spiked with laxatives and viagra. I'm sure his wife was highly amused in their hotel bed that night! :)


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    #9
    Kasabian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,689 ✭✭✭Kasabian


    Nforce wrote: »
    Going back a few years now...but at a dinner dance the MD was spiked with laxatives and viagra. I'm sure his wife was highly amused in their hotel bed that night! :)
    .

    Hmmmm


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    #10
    Cantona's Collars
    Registered Users Posts: 33,709 ✭✭✭✭Cantona's Collars


    Nforce wrote: »
    Going back a few years now...but at a dinner dance the MD was spiked with laxatives and viagra. I'm sure his wife was highly amused in their hotel bed that night! :)

    White stuff for coming,brown for going.


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    #11
    mattjack
    Registered Users Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    Wasn't really a horror story...lots of drunken merriment led to four arrests.One for pissing in the street,one for racism ...don't ask ..I dont know ,two for trying to rescue him for the Gardai ..they deserved to be arrested.I myself woke up on a bus in Drogheda, again don't ask ..I don't know...


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    #12
    Kimia
    Registered Users Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    I heard one, an urban legend i think, where a guy woke up in a trolley (trolly?) in tescos carpark wearing a kids munster jersey. I loled.


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    #13
    DEFTLEFTHAND
    Registered Users Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    I was making rather merry one Christmas Eve in a drinking establishment and was asked to leave the premises. I'm usually not one for trouble so it was quite the embarrassment for a man of my social standing in town.


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    #14
    CarMe
    Registered Users Posts: 677 ✭✭✭CarMe


    The CEO's daughter was doing work experience in our company, I got drunk on a night out and told her he's a ride and that I've hung up on him when he asked me to do something I wasn't sure of :(


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    #15
    Kimia
    Registered Users Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    CarMe wrote: »
    The CEO's daughter was doing work experience in our company, I got drunk on a night out and told her he's a ride and that I've hung up on him when he asked me to do something I wasn't sure of :(

    :confused:

    Confused about genders!


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    #16
    Kevin Duffy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    I used to work with a guy who was an Aikido expert and prone to paranoid fits. He proved what a bad combination that was when he opted, for no reason, with no warning and no prior contact, to throw me over a table. Still, I won a tin of biscuits in the raffle and went home with a very hawt colleague, so the horror was short lived.


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    #17
    CarMe
    Registered Users Posts: 677 ✭✭✭CarMe


    Kimia wrote: »
    CarMe wrote: »
    The CEO's daughter was doing work experience in our company, I got drunk on a night out and told her he's a ride and that I've hung up on him when he asked me to do something I wasn't sure of :(

    :confused:

    Confused about genders!
    Told her that her dad is a ride


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    #18
    Kevin Duffy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    CarMe wrote: »
    The CEO's daughter was doing work experience in our company, I got drunk on a night out and told her he's a ride and that I've hung up on him when he asked me to do something I wasn't sure of :(
    Kimia wrote: »
    :confused:

    Confused about genders!

    I'm gonna guess that CarMe is female. Am I right? What do I win?


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    #19
    mattjack
    Registered Users Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    Kevin Duffy wrote: »
    I'm gonna guess that CarMe is female. Am I right? What do I win?

    a table and some biscuits


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    #20
    Kevin Duffy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    mattjack wrote: »
    a table and some biscuits


    If they're the same ones from my story, I'll pass, thanks. If you have my hawt former colleague as a third prize, I'll take her instead.


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    #21
    mattjack
    Registered Users Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    CarMe wrote: »
    Told her that her dad is a ride

    If you played things right, you coulda ended up being being her stepmother .


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    #22
    TheUsual
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,288 ✭✭✭TheUsual


    mattjack wrote: »
    If you played things right, you coulda ended up being being her stepmother .

    Could get a sex-change and be both her step-mother and step-father.

    Wait, I think I've hurt my brain ...


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    #23
    3ndahalfof6
    Registered Users Posts: 5,184 ✭✭✭3ndahalfof6


    nothing much I killed 4 people under a table who were already dead, ate a tin of biscuits to replenish the system, to prepare me for my next mission, killing a ryde.


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