He dumped me for his bestfriend

LegacyUser

Hey guys,
So, posted here before. Boyfriend broke up with me about 5 weeks ago with no valid reason.
Became public knowledge over FB 2weeks ago, he got with his bestfriend(girl)
I had suspected this was the reason he had dumped me in the first place(she suddenly became single, 2 weeks later, he ends it out of nowhere) but to be proven right, it has hurt me alot. Especially when I read comments, to realise, it had been going on a long time, aka when I was about.
I'm lucky enough these two werent in my circle of friends and when we broke up, that was it.
But when I saw this and saw the disrespect in regards to me, I felt very hurt.
He didnt pick up the phone, even throw me a text for heads up. Instead, my friend asked if I'd seen it! And since we actually broke up, he'd been avoiding me. Guilt, I now realise! I thought I had done something extremely horrid for my great boyf to turn into my avoding-me ex.

Now, I cant stop thinking about it. About them when I was there and how two faced they both were. How I was made a fool of by the both of them. I met her twice and thought she was nice. Only to find this all out, just when I was forgetting about it too!

Am I right to be hurt? I would never do this to someone! If I had a thing for my bestfriend, I wouldnt involve someone else and then ditch them at the drop of a hat. And if I did, I would tell them the truth and not let them beat themselves up wondering (like I have!)

I cant help but think relationships/dating is going to be this tough alot of the time.
My ex before him cheated on me too. And when I met the last ex, he was so different.
Yet.... I lose?
I cant seem to get it right!

I mean, I must have doormat written all over me!

Just feel like a fool. Like, our whole relationship was lies - that Im none of the things he said because he must of been practising for her!? Feel silly for saying that but I feel I was his practise run! He hasnt done alot to assure me otherwise!

Anyone have any sort of advice for me? Guess I want alot of HELP to forget this!

*I have, yet again, bottled this up because I cant really express anything about it*

A0

Yes, you're right to be hurt. But there's no advice to give apart from moving on.

Learn from this and always keep an eye on your bf / partner when there's a female "best friend" around. Female-Male very close friendship... does it work :rolleyes:

Fittle

The only bit of advice I can offer is to delete him from FB! If you've already done that, then block him so that you can't see any of his comments on other peoples pages.

'I thought I had done something extremely horrid for my great boyf to turn into my avoding-me ex.'

Well, he wasn't that great in reality, now was he? You need to remember that you have done nothing wrong here - he has made his choice and you have to accept it and move on from him. Don't torture yourself anymore - he's not worth it.

LegacyUser

Hey,
To be honest, perhaps I'm the problem. I mean, all I ever do is put my best forward.. guys think they can screw around when theyre with me. Tell me such wonderful things about myself and then snatch it away as quick. Act one way and do another?

I honestly thought I was getting my first real boyfriend. Yeah yeah 20, long time to get one ya ya. But I felt it. I thought with my college course, great new friends and boyf, new job, I was getting my fairytale after years of bullying, being treated awfully throughout my teens/school life and bad exes etc etc

Fool, I was.

I feel utterly worthless. No matter how many times I rehearse in the bathroom mirror every morning, I still dont believe its their loss. I feel like crap.
When I read my exes stauses(the ex from last year) about his girlfriend and all her wonderful gifts etc, yet hes texting me to see how I am?!

Why am I always second choice? happy bloody xmas to me...

Sisko

Don't be so hard on yourself. You've had multiple relationships by 20, there a lot of people out there who've never had one.

People can grow apart and people can begin to get strong feelings for someone else. Its best the relationship ends instead of going on if the guy does not feel the same way about you that you do him. Things could get much worse in that case.

Don't take it so personally, people don't have a whole lot of control on who they fall for.

You could just as easily fall for some other guy next time your in a relationship. What do you do then? There's no easy way to let your BF know that you don't feel the same way for him that he does you.

Its natural to feel hurt but remember it doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you.