Finding it hard to relax!

theg81der

Hi everyone!

Found out last week that I`m pregnant am nearly 6 weeks now. Have spotting (since 20th Nov) and cramping (mildish and intermitant). I had a miscarriage 2 years ago and am out of work right now so finding it very difficult to relax and not think about it.

Have appointment with Doctor tomorrow but since its too early for a scan I`m sure it`ll be a wait and see sort of thing. I am just sooooo tense and it can`t be good, actually in bed now because I got a bit too upset earlier and felt unwell.

Just can`t see a way I could cope if I had another mis and pre-emting it is making me very stressed. Don`t feel I can enjoy it till I know its "real" sore boobs is about the only symptom - no tiredness or morning sickness bit emotional aswell.

Victor

Do you want to talk to a doctor this evening. Is there an out of hours doctor service in your area? http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/LHO/Louth/GPs,_Out_of_Hours_GP_Service,_Medical_Card/GP_Out_of_Hours_Service_in_Louth_.html

Short of that, VHI have a phone nurse https://www.vhi.ie/nurse/index.jsp or you local pharmacist.

Is there someone you can talk to about this? Partner, family, friend?

Can you go for a walk to burn off the stress?

Try some relaxation exercises.

theg81der

Thanks but theres nothing anyone can do or say, a doc or vhi can`t confirm anything is ok - they can say cramping and spotting can be normal, I know the stats. I`ve loads of people to talk to none of whom have been through miscarriage.

I suppose I thought I was hoping I would get some comfort from someoone here with a similar experience.

Did you have morning sickness? Does it mean anything that I don`t? Does it mean anything that I don`t feel pregnant?

I feel like I`m readying for the worst is this normal?

Yea have been walking everyday and doing meditations just can`t switch my brain of.

LegacyUser

Hi OP,

I really know what you're talking about. I also miscarried before and have had fertility treatments. I'm now just about up to 12 weeks so starting to relax now. I gave myself permission to do nothing for weeks. I didn't want to take any chances. I haven't had spotting, although many women do, but was cramping badly every day for the first few weeks. In the end I started to convince myself that this was a good sign as it's the uterus stretching out. Remember, after just one miscarriage, your chances of a normal pregnancy are just about as good as anyone else's. Also, call a hospital or a private scanning clinic and get a scan next week. We saw a heartbeat at seven weeks and it really helped. Best of luck and I hope it works out for you

javagal

theg81der wrote: »

Thanks but theres nothing anyone can do or say, a doc or vhi can`t confirm anything is ok - they can say cramping and spotting can be normal, I know the stats. I`ve loads of people to talk to none of whom have been through miscarriage.

I suppose I thought I was hoping I would get some comfort from someoone here with a similar experience.

Did you have morning sickness? Does it mean anything that I don`t? Does it mean anything that I don`t feel pregnant?

I feel like I`m readying for the worst is this normal?

Yea have been walking everyday and doing meditations just can`t switch my brain of.

Hi !!
I had the exact same thing yesterday. Had some brown spottage last week which turned red yesterday so I rushed to hospital.
Doctor said that because the bleeding wasn't heavy enough for a pad and I had no extreme pain that not to worry.
They then Scanned and I saw baby's heart!!
Please try not worry- It doesnt do baby any good.
I have cramps all the time, it's uterus stretching aparantly.
I also have no sickness, just a bit tired at times

theg81der

Hi Javagal,

Was actually just reading the july thread and say your story and someone elses so it did make me feel a bit better thanks just so hard to get over the last time it really blind sided me had no idea anything could go wrong.

How bad was your cramping? this is more like ovulation cramps and abit spasmy.

javagal

theg81der wrote: »

Hi Javagal,

Was actually just reading the july thread and say your story and someone elses so it did make me feel a bit better thanks just so hard to get over the last time it really blind sided me had no idea anything could go wrong.

How bad was your cramping? this is more like ovulation cramps and abit spasmy.

They were very like period cramps but not as bad, I still have them at 9wks. A few of us in the july thread do!So don't worry!

Neyite

I never had morning sickness - not even a bit of nausea. Didnt have any other symptoms either really - a bit more tired, but thats not really a pregnancy symptom you could put your finger on. No sore boobs or nothing! Today at my second antenatal appointment (17 weeks) there was a belter of a heartbeat, so I know all is ok in there.

I had a private scan done at 7+4 - it cost me 100 and was brilliant for peace of mind to reassure me that I was pregnant and all ok. Could you go for one to set your mind at ease a bit?

dublinlady

theg81der wrote: »

Thanks but theres nothing anyone can do or say, a doc or vhi can`t confirm anything is ok - they can say cramping and spotting can be normal, I know the stats. I`ve loads of people to talk to none of whom have been through miscarriage.

I suppose I thought I was hoping I would get some comfort from someoone here with a similar experience.

Did you have morning sickness? Does it mean anything that I don`t? Does it mean anything that I don`t feel pregnant?

I feel like I`m readying for the worst is this normal?

Yea have been walking everyday and doing meditations just can`t switch my brain of.

Hey - just wanted to say that I had a miscarriage and then 10 months later became pregnant again, we were trying 18 months in total. When I fell pregnant the second time I was so so worried - I had really severe cramping from weeks 5-7 - just the same as when I miscarried and just as severe - even my g.p said it was probable I was muscat tying again. I literally started to grieve the pregnancy and felt no hope for it. I then had a scan at 7 weeks when they found not one but two little heartbeats!! Unfort we lost one twin at 9 weeks but I'm currently almost 30 weeks pregnant still with a little girl! It was horrendous, losing a twin , a second miscarriage really, but I have to be positive now for this fab little baba I do have. Basically what I'm trying to say is I did have bad cramping - mostly down to stretching and implantation as the pain was well before I was lising my twin. So pain can be normal! Also I have not sufferered a single moment of morning sickness this whole pregnancy!
It's hard but you have to stay positive literally until you're definitively told that something is wrong - otherwise you will stress yourself silly which is not good for you or the baba! Try get lots of rest and eat healthy and get some gentle exercise , this will all help towards making you feel more optimistic! Best of luck and congrats!!!

cyning

The cramping and spotting are horrendous: I'm 9 and a half weeks pregnant and i've had two bleeds the second one quite heavy last week, and I've had a previous miscarraige two years ago too. I know how hard it is to stay positive: but you can get scanned from 7 weeks: I had a normal healthy heartbeat at 7 weeks (was scanned at 8 weeks again and again last week at nearly 9 weeks so I know the stress). Could you ask your doc for a referral to the foetal assessment unit/early pregnancy unit depending on where you are? My cramps can feel like any thing from a stitch in my side to really bad PMS.

I really have to second the relaxing thing: when I went into hosp last week my pulse was 147 through total stress: cue been told to relax... one of the nurses kept telling me to relax for babies sake so it really is important.

I've been having horrendous morning sickness: so I have read everything I can on it. Not having morning sickness doesn't mean anything. And in my case I was 6 weeks before it started in real proper earnest so don't read anything into it. Don't wish it upon yourself honestly.

theg81der

Hi all just to update went to doc sent to hospital will be scanned next wednesday. Everyone say prayers or cross your fingers or whatever for me!

cocoemma

you know i just read through this and getting all teary everyone is so nice and we know exactly how you feel, i'm only a first timer but some woman are two and three timers and I value their opinions/advice.. ...

I can't help you relax fully but i'll share some of my imput... sometimes it depends were the egg inplants itself in the womb it could be low down like.. I didn't spot and I was WORRIED because I didn't ha can you imagine....I was the opposite I was thinking WHY.... I can understand your previous experience would have you worried but try not too, your body is strong and you'd be surprised how the littlest things survive THE LITTLEST...

I'm 16 weeks today and i do get cramping pains, pains in the pelvis, hips, back, legs,I put it all down to growing pains... I never vomited I got morning sickness at 6 weeks and felt sick most of the time but just kept eating every two hours and that saved me from being sick, I was tired and hormanal and crying every morning ha ha.. last week I was in dunnes and I had cramps so intense I had to stop to breathe through it (i do have a good pain thrushold it was that intense) I was soo worried but I was fine.. You have your appiontment next week so thats great and it'll fly in for you only 5 days and then you can relax.. congradulations BTW

Victor

theg81der wrote: »

Did you have morning sickness?

I'm a bloke and while my waistline suggests I might be pregnant ...

theg81der

Thanks everyone you have no idea how much your helping I feel like I'm allowing myself to feel a wee bit more positive now! :-)

theg81der

Hi just to update all is well found heartbeat and everything even got a picture! So relieved! Thanks for calming me down everyone.

cyning

theg81der wrote: »

Hi just to update all is well found heartbeat and everything even got a picture! So relieved! Thanks for calming me down everyone.

That's excellent!! I know the stress of it, relax and start enjoying it now