Anxiety/Stress/Depression

budweiser90

Right guys I think I really need help and I don't know who I can talk to. I suffer from anxiety really bad and its beginning to take over my life. I worry about small things and its causing me to worry 24/7. Its effecting me so much that I get a worried feeling in my stomach that I cannot eat. I have my good days when everything can be going ok but my bad days are really bad. For example I'm seeing someone at the moment and I really like them. But he hasn't texted me since yesterday and I'm getting worried he's not interested. Its been on my mind all day. This is just the tip of the ice berg. Please help, is there someone I can see about my situation? I feel so alone right now

Deus Ex Machina

Get 'old of yourself! Why not lash him a lovely aul text: "How are you doing, how are ya gettin' on?" Invite him over for a coffee or something. Anxiety is often fear of the unknown, so be proactive, find out if he likes you, find out of you'll sink or swim, find out if you're tough enough. If you win, happy days, if you lose, you don't have anything left to fear and you can grow stronger by moving on. He who dares wins! Odysseus didn't sit around wondering if he could make it back to Ithaca......

Kimia

Hello fellow anxiety sufferer! I know too well the feelings you're describing. Recognizing that you're worrying for nothing is a really good first step. What helps me is a couple of things:

1) Meditation. I try to stop and 'smell the roses' so to speak, and literally just sit still for maybe 10 - 15 minutes at a time, just relaxing and listening to myself breathe.

2) Mindfulness. This is key. When I'm freaking out and my mind is racing, so much that I feel like sometimes my head is going to explode, I just let it happen and almost look at it from outside myself. I realized that I was being really hard on myself - saying almost subconsciously 'stop this, you're being stupid' etc. But that doesn't help. Just observe yourself getting worked up, and don't try to stop it. Go with it, and you'll soon realize that nothing happens, the sky doesn't fall down, and things will get easier.

3) Distraction. If you're freaking out because a guy doesn't text you - get busy!! Go out with your friends and leave your phone at home. Try to keep busy with stuff you really enjoy doing so that your mind isn't hovering over the phone and what the latest news from him is.

4) Go with it. Ask yourself, what's the worst thing that could happen? So he doesn't text you ever, so what? So you never end up having a real relationship, so what? So you live alone for the rest of your life, etc etc. You'll soon realize that most of what you're fearing is totally irrational and if you go with it, you'll see how mad it sounds and you'll probably end up laughing it off.

5) Talk it out with someone, or write your worries down. Sometimes just releasing them is a great way of removing them from your mind. Read back on them too so that you can learn from your experiences and see how needless a lot of your worry really is.

Best of luck!

qwertytlk

Hi i think everyone has bouts of anxiety and depression from time to time, but most people will be able to work it out themselves as they wouldnt have as severe as you. My advice would be that if you havent been able to get over it or make any improvement on it by yourself that you should see a counsellor. I think this would be of a huge help to you as a counsllor should be able to help you get to the root of whats causing the anxiety/depression and therefore work on whatever that may be, which should hopefully then make an improvement to the anxiety and any other issues.
So if you dont already have a counsellor, the best thing would be to go to your GP who can then refer you to a counsellor. Best of luck and i hope you feeling better soon:)

p.s im regard to the boyfriend issue, well i would be the same as you, worrying if i usually had daily contact and then suddenly silence. But as a above poster suggested, why not just text him? Its a win win situation because if you text he may reply and everything will be fine-he could just be busy/habe something going on. Or,unfortunatley he may not be interested anymore, but as least you will know now instead of sitting there driving yourself mad wondering. And if the latter is the case, well if tats the way he treats people you would be better off anyway without him. Plus you could focus your full attention on getting yourself sorted.
Best of luck. Take care x

Fionne

As a fellow anxiety sufferer I can empathise. It's called Generalised Anxiety Disorder when you worry incessantly about seemingly unimportant things.

I can recommend a book called Self Help For Your Nerves by Claire Weekes. I know, a book, you're thinking how can that help but it really helped me when I was at my worst. The other suggestions given by Kimia are also good advice.

Main thing is, you're not the only person who's ever felt this way and it can and will get better.

lisapenn

Try these breathing execises, they were very helpful to me:

1. The Sigh Breath
This is a very simple technique, easy to remember for the next time anxiety knocks on your door. It will relieve the tension in your neck and chest area also.
Breathe in through your nose – in a moderate (not very deep) way – slowly. Pause and hold the air inside for just a second – then let it out slowly through your mouth. Make your exhale as long as possible – this is the key. Pay attention to every second of it – especially to that moment that exhaling has finished – that silent moment before the next inhale.
As you repeat this for the second time – take a look around you and what’s going on around you – quietly.
You can repeat this 3-5 times until your feel your entire body is relaxed.
2. 4-7-8 Breath – Advanced
This is a more advanced breathing exercise – try to remember it from reading it now so it will be “ready” for you when you need it.
This is done sitting down on a chair with your back straight and your hands lying loose on your lap. Closing your eyes can be helpful for concentration.
Inhale through your nose slowly and deeply until you mentally count to 4. Push out your abdomen when you inhale to fill your upper lungs first. Hold your breath until you count to 7. Smoothly exhale through your mouth to the count of 8. It’s easy to remember this: 4-7-8!
Imagine all your anxiety and tension leave your body while exhaling. You can do 10 to 12 rounds of this as a beginner. It will relax your mind, relax your muscles and balance your emotions.


Source: http://natural-alternative-therapies.com

giggitygig

Breathing is a great way to focus your mind elsewhere. A way I learned to bring myself out of my head was to do a simple sum of 4x2=8. A long slow breath in through my nose for 4 seconds, hold it in for 2 seconds and a nice firm 8 seconds blowing out of my mouth. Do this repeatedly until you feel yourself calming down. No matter how many things are going through your head, you will always only think of one thing at a time. Concentrate on your breathing as much as possible, get to know it.

By putting a colour on the anxiety it can help to look at it differently and maybe even manage better. If the level of anxiety is ok and not over-consuming, not overwhelming, you could give it a green. If you imagine the anxiety getting worse, the colour becomes deeper and darker, onto orange, red, brown, purple and black (whatever colours you prefer). The anxiety around the lad not sending you a text, what colour would that be at?
By combining the colours with the breaths as they come and go, we could be onto a winner Long, slow breaths in through your nose for 4 seconds, look at this as a nice pleasant colour. As you hold for the 2 seconds, the pleasant happy colour is taking shape and rushing into your body. When you blow out for the 8 seconds, look at the colours in this breath, how dark and deep they are. You see them in your minds eye, struggling to hold on but there is no longer a place for them in you. Watch them when they leave, hovering there, but a nice wind comes and scatters them away, never to be seen again, while you slowly take in another 4 seconds of warm, happy colours.

Anxiety can be deeply troubling, fighting it can sometimes make it worse. Using the techniques above can at least help you counter it

I used to/still do (slightly) suffer from anxiety, this would usually spiral out of control and land me in a pretty dark depression. One morning I decided enough was enough and went to see a GP. She prescribed me with medication, but if you do this it's important that you just use it as a crutch and not as the actual solution. The medication helped me clear my head, which helped me focus on the other things that were bothering me, such as social anxiety. Now I am doing even better than ever and have really noticed the difference.

The first step is admitting there's a problem, the second step is seeking help the third and last step is actually doing something with the advice/help you're given.